


Rogue Kings In The Wasteland

by BeautifullyEmotionalTeen



Series: Tales of the Desert Revolution [2]
Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Album), Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Art, Better Living Industries, Chess Metaphors, Five Stages of Grief, Fluff and Angst, Loss of Trust, M/M, Music, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-08
Updated: 2017-05-29
Packaged: 2018-09-07 05:29:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 67,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8785018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeautifullyEmotionalTeen/pseuds/BeautifullyEmotionalTeen
Summary: *A sequel to Bloodtrails Dried By The Sun*Wars and battles are a common thing in the desert outside Battery City. Fighting and being persecuted is something normal for rebels. But years and years of conflict built up and exploded one day, creating what future rebels will call the Poisonous Battle. People died. But now there's a new light of hope for the revolutionary side of things. A Queen has come to put the pawns in order and take back what has been stolen. But just how far will they have to go to win the match?





	1. You Go First

_After the Helium Wars, there was a period of time where rebels were on a bad place. A time of fear, a time of hiding. The insurgent group known as the Fabulous Killjoys had taken a big blow. Kobra Kid and Jet Star had been killed. People were dying everyday._

_Until a new character came into view, one of The Five. It's name's Blurryface. It was nesting inside a boy named Tyler Joseph, therefore it's referred as a he. His sudden appearance shone light upon the existance of The Five. Entities, mostly energies which can take a physical form. They're suspected to have power over the human mind in ways we're yet to understand._

_The only members found are Blurryface and a woman with white hair. We are aware of her existance because of various eye-witnesses._

_Both Blurryface and this mysterious woman played a huge part in the Poisonous Battle. Over 700 confirmed rebel kills. Other 100 rebels missing. 1,000 draculoid kills._

_The few autopsies done on rebels reveal strange causes of death. Necks snapped and severe brain damage. Actual dead tissue was found on one of the rebel's brain. What could cause such damage is still unknown. We can make some assumptions._

_Gerard Way, now known as Hesitant Alien, was rescued from the road after a suicide attempt. We believe this was the right choice._

_The Poisonous Battle was the spark this rebel society needed._

_Fueled by anger, revenge and an urgue for freedom, this, is how the Desert Revolution really begins._

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Gerard didn't want the Desert Revolution to really begin. 

Apparently, S.I.G.H.T had been doing a historian job and that was the most recent report in their History of the Zones volume 12. Thousands of pages recorded what had happened here, long before Gerard was even born. 

His chamber was poorly lit, to save energy apparently. There was an IV connected to his arm. He didn't want to think too much about that. Of course they had refused to give him something for his fear of being in a giant flying machine. 

And of course they had put him on suicide watch. 

Which apparently was not so weird around here. He figured that this ship was full of teenage rebels dealing with some heavy stuff. Gerard wasn't a teenager anymore, but he struggled too. After hours of fighting with nurses, they drew some blood and found out about his little drug problem. 

Which let to an hour long lecture about responsability and dangerous substances provided by his new friend Ashlynne. 

Ashlynne wasn't bad. She was just a worried leader. Gerard could see she wasn't just some official barking orders, she cared about each one of the people under her command. And Gerard respected that. 

But maybe the whole 'let's save the world' thing was getting a little into her head. 

He understood that he was a crucial piece in her game, so he kind of already had a worried mom. That reminded him of Ray. 

He was definitely the mom. 

Something great about that floating ship was that it actually was meant to hold human beings, and he was sure most rebels on board were as amazed as he was. There were kids that didn't know what a real bed looked like. Felt like. It was a reward, a heavenly gift for all those years surrounded by dust and sweat. 

There were _showers_ for God's sake. 

And the guards trusted him enough to take a shower on his own. He melted under the constant flow of cool water, hitting his face and slowly falling all over his body. It sent chills down his spine, and he stayed there for a couple minutes. 

And because showers are the universal places for contemplating your existance, Gerard stood under the water staring at the wall with little water drops hanging from his eyelashes. 

What the fuck was he doing? 

Could he just stop being such a depressive fuck? 

Snap out of it, Gerard. 

I know it hurts but have some goddamn dignity. 

Instead of banging his head against the tiles like he wanted to, Gerard took the soap bar and scrubbed himself full force. He scrubbed all his body, washing off the dirt and dust that had stuck to his skin for years. 

The water swirling around his feet turned brown. 

He washed it all off, everything. He washed the past off. He scrubbed Party Poison off his skin. 

The water turned red and he panicked a little bit thinking he was bleeding, but it was just his hair dye coming off. His hair, which was all stiff and dry, came back to life with the magical powers of shampoo and conditioner. Repairing years of damage. 

Then he stepped out of the shower into his room, and dried himself with a towel. He saw a different person in the mirror. It had been years since he had looked at a mirror, way back when he was still in his house. Still in Battery City. 

And he looked like he hadn't aged a day. 

Suddenly he saw the scared teen he once was, wrapped in a pure white towel and pale as a vampire. He could easily picture the black greasy hair and the cigarette dangling from his lips. 

But he wasn't that guy anymore. 

His eyes looked perpetually tired from countless sleepless nights, his skin was jabbed with old scars. The red dye had fallen off with the water since he hadn't renewed it in a long time, leaving the good old natural dark brown. It looked really soft. 

He let himself fall onto the bed, and stared at the ceiling. He was sure Ashlynne was doing everything she could to fulfill Gerard's requests, since she let him watch her work. But she didn't allow him to do _anything_ to help. 

"Heal, then work." she had said. 

But Gerard needed to work in order to heal. It was just the way he was, how he had always done it. Learn to work with the wound. Learn to live with the pain, until it didn't bother you anymore. Out there in the desert there was no time to heal and _then_ work. You had to do both at the same time. 

Apparently, that was not the way's suppose to be. 

But what could Gerard do? He had broken his bones and had them healed wrong. He was wrong, crooked. And he had always lived with it. 

Him, as well as many others, just needed someone to show them how great they could be. 

The problem was, Gerard Way's someone was dead. 

Or, at least, that's what he thought. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frank was pretty sure Gerard thought he was dead. It had been a last goodbye, no more after that. So to the world, Fun Ghoul was dead. 

Except he wasn't. He was suffocating in a hole some people called home. His sleeping place was conveniently under a leak, that either hit him in the eye or damped his thin pillow. The room was dark, there was only one yellow lightbulb attached to the ceiling, that was so freaking low only Frank could stand completely upright. 

He felt like he was running out of air constantly, but Dark Spades and his siblings seemed to be just fine. 

He had carried Frank from the battlefield all the way back to the underground. Under the sun. All by himself. So Frank thought he was really awesome. The fact that he could live in such conditions (which were bad even for a rebel) and still have the strength and will to carry a wounded stranger to his lair in order to safe him was pretty impressive. 

Also his way of caring for people was almost supernatural. 

Frank wasn't the only one. He had swept the Zones bringing in more and more people who needed help. People who were very far down the rabbit hole. People that everyone would have given up on. Full on addicts, rebels missing legs that couldn't walk on their own. Children. 

Dark Spades took everyone under his wing, and somehow managed to keep them all alive. Where he got all the supplies from was unknown. If he ate his portion of the reduced food was also unknown to him. Frank really thought the guy got his energy from the sun. 

Frank had thought Dark Spades's eyes were just a product of him hallucinating vividly, but they actually were like that. Like someone had forged two diamonds into irises and placed them on him like contact lenses. And it wasn't only Frank that saw them. The kids specially liked to see the dots of light they reflected across the room. 

Which was weird, but definitely wasn't the weirdest thing out there, or that Frank had seen. 

The little refugee camp was starting to fall short, and even if Dark Spades had weird magical eyes, he still couldn't be on all places at once. And Frank wanted to help, that's what he could do best in that situation. But instead he was bound to a bed with his leg wrapped in miles of bandages. 

And he didn't like it at all. He didn't like being a burden, someone who couldn't take care of himself. That was the thing about rebels. They made the worst patients in the world. They were so used to being tough (they had to be) and just walk things off, that when they really needed to rest and heal, they wanted to rush through it and jump back into action. 

Rebels like Frank felt like being still and not doing anything was a waste of time. Hell, if they could go on without sleep, their eyelids would not close. Ever. Frank felt like he was slowly getting rusty. And it would be painful to get back on track. 

But his fear of seeing Dark Spades angry was greater than his uncomfortableness. Frank had seen people get extremely difficult with him and Dark Spades' anger was something that needed to be kept inside. Frank wished he could go back to a time without all the supernatural stuff. A time when the weirdest thing out there was BL/ind and their mind-melting drugs. 

Out of all the things he wanted, Frank wanted to see Gerard. His chest tightened everytime he thought about him, how he was completely alone out there in the desert. How he thought Frank was dead and was blaming himself for it. He didn't want to picture his loved one curled up somewhere crying silently, his sobs echoing around an empty diner. A head without the limbs. 

As soon as he can he will jump out of bed and search in every Zone until he finds Gerard, hugs him, and tells him he's not dead. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tyler was someone cheerful, and full of energy. Before Blurryface, of course. After that he became an hourglass. Slowly running out of sand until one day it came to a sudden stop. And he himself had to push that one grain of sand and get it all over with. 

No more time, no more breaths. No more Blurryface. No more Tyler. 

It wasn't difficult at all. He knew his time was up and he didn't think he would leave anything behind. Except he did. He, was the weapon. All along. Born only to destroy minds and break hearts. He was just a vessel, a conduit for a bigger, much darker purpose.

Tyler wasn't supposed to be loved. 

Except he was. He was loved with such passion it granted him a little more than a second of doubt. A small fraction of time where he had his finger over the trigger and was about to pull it. Just a moment when he thought that what he was doing was wrong. It wasn't the right thing to do. When is leaving a broken heart the right thing to do? 

Many times, actually. And this was one of them. Whatever happens to Josh after the bullet goes through his brain, it's no longer up to him. He had loved the guy in his own, fragile broken way, and Josh had made him a better version of himself. At least, that's how he felt. That's what love is supposed to do. 

Think twice about your actions, because there's somebody else being affected by them? Yes, is an inevitable side-effect of love. But Tyler, in that moment, was all alone. It was his desicion to make, his only second of free will. He saw a chance to escape and he took it. 

Josh had been his lantern, the light guiding his path through a long, dark, seemingly endless corridor. But the gun? The gun was an exit sign that led into the unknown. Tyler trusted that unknown to be better. 

So he took the leap. And out of all things he could have felt, he felt weightless. Like his body had fallen to the ground and he was floating around. His surroundings were gloomy, but bathed in a neon blue light. It was weirdly beautiful. He looked for the source of that light, and saw a giant blue star. 

It was shining in between the dark clouds, calmly floating there. He felt attracted to it, like it would give him the peace he wanted. So he slowly glided towards it, and just as he was about to get to it, as he was touching it's warm surface with his fingertips, something wrapped around his ankle and pulled him down. His whole body jerked downwards, and it felt like the blue star was the surface and something had grabbed him and was pulling him down into the ocean so he would drown. 

And that's exactly how he felt, like the creature was throwing him around making him swallow gallons of salt water that burned his lungs, his throat, his brain. It was completely dark for a moment, and then he felt like he was falling. Finally, he hit a hard surface, and laid there gathering his breath. 

The question was, why was he not dead? 

He opened his eyes, his surroundings slowly coming into focus. Apparently, he was on the floor, his clothes were soaked in water and he was lying in a puddle. The walls were pure white, and after looking around he realized where he was. 

A padded cell. 

Something weird flashed in his mind, like the same room but with scratches, screaming and scarlet blood. Then again, his visions were mostly that, so he didn't quite believe it. 

He coughed harshly and spat more salt water on the floor. A constant wave of discomfort was washing over him again and again. It took him some time to gather himself up and notice that he wasn't alone. 

There was a guy sitting on the floor, and leaning against the wall. Half his face was covered by a bright red beanie, he had a white sleeveless shirt with a flowery kimono over his shoulders. His pants were dark and tight with red socks and black shoes. 

His eyes were closed and his lips were curled in a sarcastic smile, revealing two pairs of sharp, white fangs. Most importantly, his hands and neck were pitch black. 

Tyler's stomach twisted as he recognized the guy. 

" _hi, Joseph. _" he said, his smile growing wider. " _Missed me?_ "__

Tyler didn't answer. He just stared at the floor, his hair dripping. Maybe he would never have peace. Maybe the universe wanted him to be trapped with that maniac for all eternity. What had he done wrong to possibly deserve this? 

" _Come ooooon_ " he whined. " _At least talk to me, if we're gonna be here for a while_ "

"Shut up." Tyler whispered, examining the room for a way out. The walls were all the same, no windows. The 'roof' if he could call it that way, seemed to be like an upside down pond filled with dark oil. It had little waves over it's surface, lazily moving up and down.

" _I'm assuming you know how to say something other than 'shut up', 'leave me alone' and 'go away'. I lived in your head, Joseph, I know you can get way more creative than that._ "

Tyler just ignored him. It worked for a while until Blurryface grabbed him by the neck and banged him against the wall, holding him so high up his feet didn't touch the ground. It wasn't so painful given the walls were covered with cushions. But Blurryface stared at him with his deep red eyes and muttered:

_Listen, Joseph, it disgusts me to be here with you as well, trust me. There's no way out, okay? I've looked. You want me to give you a boost so you can go up there and try to swim your way out, be my guest, you'll drown in seconds. Now you might think that I don't give a bloody fuck about you, and believe me I would like to do so, but unfortunately you're directly tied to me and you've caused me enough trouble..._ " 

"Oh, _I've_ caused you trouble?!" Tyler shouted, and Blurryface blinked, surprised that Tyler snapped back at him. "I'm really sorry! Is not like you've made my life a living hell or anything." 

________The sarcasm in his voice was heavy, enough to annoy Blurryface._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

" _Watch how you talk to me, boy_ " he said, his voice low and dangerous. " _A tongue that sharp will cause you nothing but sorrow_ " 

________"Fuck you." he whispered, and Blurryface let him fall heavily onto the ground._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Blurryface scoffed and walked around the cell, his red eyes lost in thought. His anger was boiling in his chest, and he really didn't want to punch Tyler. That would weaken him even more and he couldn't afford that._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He was still shocked, after Tyler's little stunt. He had been in complete control, Josh was making things a little difficult, but he always had. Blurryface was on a killing spree, he was feeling powerful and unbeatable._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________And it was only a second, he watched helplessly as Tyler put a gun to his mouth. And he hadn't been scared, he _thought_ he knew Tyler wouldn't pull the trigger. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________And he did._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Blurryface had never experienced pain. He _inflicted_ pain, he knew how other people felt that pain, but he himself had never been in pain. He thought it wasn't possible. But it was. He had only been in pain two times in his life. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________One, when Tyler had been kissed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________God, it had been awful. And confusing. Tyler's chest had warmed up and Blurryface felt like _something_ was clawing at him and painfully tearing him apart. There was a weird orange light that threatened to burn him into oblivion. And he didn't like that at all. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________And two, when Tyler had shot himself._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Sure, he had tempted and teased Tyler countless times, and he knew he was too weak to actually do something like shoot himself. He got an unpleasant surprise. He had tried to fight Tyler, get him to lower his arm. And he couldn't. He was so determined to put an end to himself that he couldn't stop him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________And a second later, blinding, head-splitting pain. Himself breaking apart like porcelain. Lost and drowning in the darkness he once created._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________It wasn't the first time one of his hosts killed themselves. It was just the first time he felt pain when it happened._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________What was so special about Tyler?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Then he came into consciousness trapped in a padded cell. It wasn't the first time he'd been there. But the weirdest thing of all was that he was corporeal. He wasn't Tyler, he had his own tangeable body. Which was oddly satisfying, to be able to move freely without a struggle against him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________And then Tyler fell in, and Blurryface realized he had lost the majority of his power over him. He used to be able to twist his insides with one flick of the wrist, make his energy and ideas slowly rot and throw him into a dizzy sickness._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________And now he couldn't do anything. He was struggling to bother him in any way with his powers, but they seemed to be failing._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Still, he wasn't going to let Tyler know. He hid his weakness behind a mask of aggresiveness and hostility, being the annoying little shit he was. Because for the first time in many many years, he was losing. He was weak and almost powerless, and Tyler was starting to act up against him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________And Tyler was no longer sad, or feeling hopeless. He was angry. Angry at him. The question remained:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________What was so special about Tyler?_ _______

________Because apparently, he _still_ had something to do on earth. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He wasn't done._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Not yet._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________A big ass floating spaceship had let down many soldiers that were carrying them in?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________That's fine._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Josh always knew aliens were real anyway._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The so called aliens could strap him to a gurney and disect him like a frog in biology class, that's fine. The only thing that mattered was being with Tyler._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He wasn't ready to let go. Josh felt like he would never be able to put the person he had loved the most in a coffin and bury him. Let go of his whole person, only be present in his memory. He wasn't prepared for that._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Josh didn't know what he was doing. Was he waiting for something? For all to be a dream? To wake up next to Tyler, wrapped in blankets, smiling brightly at him?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He had the awful feeling of knowing that this was real. Everything that happened? Yep, as real as it gets. He kept repeating the same thing, trying to snap out of it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Tyler is dead. Tyler is gone._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________You're alone._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Everything went by in a blur, next thing he knew  he was standing beside a bed, and Tyler was tugged in. He was lying on his side, his head on a soft pillow and his eyes closed. His skin was so pale he seemed to merge with the white sheets. Josh just stood there, gently caressing the side of his face, feeling his cold skin under his fingertips._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________It could've been hours, really. In a plain white room with a dead lover, how can you measure time?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The door opened with a creak and a tall black-haired lady entered the room along with two men that looked like they were soldiers. The stiffness of the two guards made Josh think that that woman was somehow... Important. Powerful, maybe._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________She was called Ashlynne. She was a director of some sort. She kept talking and talking but Josh only processed jagged bits of what she was saying._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He hadn't said a single thing since he and Tyler got in the ship, but something Ashlynne had in her hands made him pay closer attention._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Please tell me that's not a ouija board."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________His voice was deep and rusty, and it hurt a little to speak. Ashlynne just blinked twice and said:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"It's okay. There's nothing to be afraid of."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Are you sure about that?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Yes." she said. God, there was something about her, something that made him tense up, telling him to be cautious around her, because she knew more than she showed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Why would I even use it? He's..." Josh couldn't say it outloud. Him stuttering and tripping on his own words made Ashlynne's eyes flash with... Something. Pity? Compation?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Listen carefully, Josh." she started, putting her delicate fingertips together in a thinking manner. How she knew his name was unknown to him. Also a little creepy. "Your friend..."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Boyfriend." he corrected her, and she raised her dark eyebrows a little._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Your boyfriend, Tyler, may seem dead. But he's not. At least, not entirely. You saw the blue star incident in the battlefield, correct? We theorize your boyfriend is trapped in some sort of space similar to the blue star."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"Wait." Josh said, heat starting to rise up in his chest. "You knew about what was happening? You were _watching_?" 

________"From a distance, yes..."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"And you let all those people die?" Josh asked, out of his mind. Now he knew exactly what was going on with Ashlynne. She was vicious. Dangerous. "You just sat back and watched how people dropped dead, only to show up in the last minute when all is lost?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"An earlier intervention would have compromised our whole organization..."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Compromised?! People gave up their lives for the cause and you just stayed behind lines with your huge airship!!" Josh wanted to carry Tyler fire-fighter style over his shoulder and get the hell out. He didn't want the help of a cold, heartless woman. But something in the back of his head was telling him to believe her, at least the part of Tyler not being dead._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Do you want to listen to me?" she asked, her voice steady and calm. "Or do you want to go?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Josh stayed silent, nodding at her and swallowing his anger._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"The reason why we believe Tyler not to be dead is basically Blurryface. We think he somehow didn't let Tyler be gone entirely, he certainly has the power and the motive. But we need to know where Tyler is, it would be a start if we want to bring him back."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Why would she want Tyler back? Sure, Josh wanted him back, but Ashlynne didn't know him. She had absolutely no reason to help him. Josh still questioned as to _why_ they had picked him up. 

________Josh decided to go through with it. Anything that distracts him from reality. He started convincing himself, what if Ashlynne was right? What if Tyler was not completely dead?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He took one last look at him, his pale face and swollen eyelids, chapped lips and small frame covered in sheets. He then sighed and sat in front of the board. Not so sure about it, Josh placed his hands on the planchette._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He wasn't sure if he believed a ouija board was real, but he had seen very weird things since he escaped from Battery City, so the idea of a board that let you communicate with ghosts didn't seem so crazy._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He tried to feel a presence, to call out to Tyler, or something. How did the board exactly work? Was it like a phone where anyone could answer? How was he supposed to find Tyler among the dead?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________But suddenly, the planchette started moving. And Josh was sure he wasn't moving it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Slowly and twitching around, it moved towards the letter J, then to the letter O, and then S, and finally H._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________His hands trembled and his chest stirred painfully, and when he spoke his voice was feeble._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Tyler?" he asked. "Is that really you, Ty?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The planchette moved faster than before into the 'yes'. Josh couldn't believe his eyes. He took a look at Tyler, the real Tyler that was on the bed. He didn't look any different._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Ty are you... Are you dead? Are you in the blue star?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________When the planchette moved towards 'no', Josh felt a weight lift off his shoulders._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Where are you then?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"P-A-D-D-E-D-C-E-L-L" he spelled, making a circle around the repeated letters. Ashlynne was watching closely. A padded cell? Was that like, another dimension similar to the blue star? More importantly, why was Tyler there?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Are you alone?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"No."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Do you know who's with you?" Ashlynne asked._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"B-L-U-R-R-Y-F-A-C-E"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Josh closed his eyes to contain his anger and frustration. He didn't want to explode in front of Ashlynne._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Do you see anything that could help us get you out?" Josh didn't like the way Ashlynne was talking. Like Tyler was just a source of information. A machine that could give you the answers you wanted. Now Josh was sure Ashlynne didn't care about Tyler at all._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"No."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Then that's all." she said, and her heels clicked in the tiles as she walked away. "Remember to say goodbye, don't leave that door open."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Josh stared at the planchette, immobile over the moon that said 'no'. He started thinking about Tyler in front of him, with his ripped clothes and soft eyes, his hands placed over the planchette, ready to move it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He didn't want to imagine Blurryface looking over his shoulder with his gross smile. He wondered if Blurryface was still inside Tyler, or he was now a separated entity. If so, would he look like Tyler?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Josh had always wondered why. Why Tyler. Why was he the vessel, why did he have to carry Blurryface in his soul. _Why him_. 

________He had done nothing wrong, he wasn't a bad person. And yet he had to suffer, Josh had to watch him slowly deteriorate, when it all started out._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Tyler had tried to hide it, 'because he didn't want to worry him', he had said. But Josh knew him too well to just believe he was fine._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________"I'm fine, Josh. I'm just tired."_  
"I'm fine, Josh. I just had trouble sleeping."  
"I'm fine, Josh. I'm just not in a good mood."  
   
Things he said to try to hide what was really happening to him. And Josh had been worried sick, and since Tyler just kept denying that something was wrong, Josh had to have a kind of blind faith, that he was doing the right thing. 

________Not to ask any questions, just be there for Tyler._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________But now Josh was on his own, and Tyler wasn't the only one with troubles. He had demons too. And without Tyler, they surfaced. But he needed to be strong._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Hey, Ty." he started saying, thinking about how Tyler was probably feeling alone and afraid. "I'm not giving up on you, okay? I'm here and I'll help you out. I promise. We've always been there for each other, best friends and now lovers, remember? I love you, Ty. Never forget that."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He could almost imagine Tyler smiling at him and his cheeks blushing deeply._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"I-L-O-V-E-Y-O-U" the planchette spelled, and Josh felt warm in his chest._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________But suddenly, the little triangle moved up sharply, making Josh snatch his hands away from it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"T-Y-L-E-R-I-S-D-E-A-D" the planchette moved frenetically across the board, Josh hardly understanding a thing. "T-H-E-R-E-I-S-O-N-L-Y-M-E"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"No!" Josh yelled, seeing with scared eyes how it formed nonsense words and made a horrible sound, the planchette scratching against the wood._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________In a rush of adrenaline, he took the planchette and forcefully dragged it down until it reached 'goodbye'. Then it stopped. The air was heavy and Josh felt like he wasn't alone. He kicked the board under the bed and went out the door. It was going to be a sleepless night so he didn't want to spend it in the same room as a ouija board. He could check on Tyler at times, but something told him he wasn't going anywhere._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________~~~~~~~~~~~~_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________Korse knew this day would come._  
He dreaded it deeply.  
But when it came to it, he knew he was prepared.  
He will do _anything_ to win. 

________It had been a long match, but he won. That didn't mean he won the tournament. The war is not won by just winning a battle. The king hasn't fallen, the war wasn't over, the game is still going. The board was reset, and the armies were facing each other once again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________It wasn't common chess. They could cheat. And Korse was a really good cheater. And there weren't just pawns and bishops, both sides had some hidden, unique pieces._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________So Korse sat back, looking over his scheme and said:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________You go first_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	2. The Aftermath of a Battle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not everyone was saved from the field. While some are in S.I.G.H.T's ship, safe and sound, others are still down in the unforgiving desert, suffering the aftermath of one of the bloodiest battles they faced.

Black Believer had never had it easy on him.  
It had all started to go downhill when he left Battery City, being seventeen years old and with no purpose or direction. He wasn't happy being in Battery City, it was like he was weirdly aware of what BL/ind did. 

So he left, and probably would have died if it wasn't for Phoenix. Sweet and caring Phoenix that took an annoying teen Pete and molded him into Black Believer. 

Because that's what Phoenix does. And to him,  Pete was just another one of the many others he helped adapt to the desert life when they had no idea what to do. He wasn't the first one and he wouldn't be the last one. 

But Phoenix saw something different in him. Something special. He wasn't like the others in his own strange way. When the training was done, he was supposed to leave. He was supposed to go out into the wild again, but no longer lost and naïve. Pete was supposed to find his own path, make his own desitions and win his own battles. 

"He grew attached to you." Alpha had said when he asked him about it. 

And when the time came, when he was all grown-up and could fight better than his teacher, Phoenix asked him to stay. To be a part of a group that would soon turn into his family. The family that made him smile or cheered him up whenever his emotions got out of his control.  

The brothers that shoved him out of the way in battles to keep him save, they cared for his wounds. Phoenix smacked the pills out of his hand and hugged him that one time on a rooftop when he felt like giving up. 

Now his head was incredibly blurry and there was a sharp pain on his chest, as if he had a burning-hot spear jabbed in his right side. He was barely able to open his eyes, but he could feel someone's strong arms below him, carrying him. 

"Pete Wentz, you better not die on us." he heard Alpha's voice, a little muffled by the effort of carrying him. 

He smiled, making a little trail of blood flow down his chin. 

He recognized the dusty ceiling of the diner. How could he not? He had spent hours staring at it. They laid him down on a table and he just wanted to curl up into a ball of pain and pass out. 

"Stupid, stupid..." Serpent whispered under his breath as Alpha ran around looking for supplies. 

"Hmm?" Believer said, and it sent a wave of pain through him. 

He kind of deserved being called stupid by Serpent. Believer tended to act idiotically when things got too crazy in battle. An example was kissing Mikey Way and then passing out. He was surprised he was still awake, he was always losing consciousness after a fight. He didn't know why. 

But he remembered clearly the stupid thing he had done. 

"Taking Blurryface on his own." Alpha muttered. "What was he thinking?"

Apparently, they thought he was unconscious. But Pete was listening, and trying to keep the tears from spilling. 

"His rib is definitely broken." Serpent said, jabbing his side with his fingers. "Maybe more that one."

"Please stop that." he wanted to say, the pain was so intense it was hard to breathe. Very hard. 

"Oh God." Serpent whispered. 

"What? What's wrong?" Alpha asked, concern present in his voice. 

"There's an air pocket around his lung. He can't breathe."

That wasn't very comforting. 

"What do we do?" Alpha stuttered, and Pete could hear the fear in his voice. 

_Am I gonna die?_

"We get the air out." Serpent stated, keeping his cool. "With that."

Silence. 

"Are you sure?"

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

_Yes_

Serpent took something that looked like a small, thin blade and clenched it for a second. Pete saw his hand tremble for a moment, but it was firm when he used the blade to pierce his skin in one quick stabbing movement. 

That's when Pete passed out. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

Brendon was a good fighter. 

He could be all kinds of fighter. He could be smooth and precise. He could be violent and explosive. You would think he did great out in the desert, with all his skills. But the truth was that the desert was hell for him. He felt really lonely most of the time. He thought about going back to Battery City a lot, he was sure he could blend in easily. But it would be like giving up, like taking a hundred steps back.

So it wasn't an option. But roaming around in the sand haunted by memories wasn't so good either. 

He had fought along with the other rebels, and seeing so many people dying sent him into a state of panic. He saw hope and purpose shatter before his eyes, and he felt like he was fighting for nothing. 

Nicotined Bachelor was now walking down the road, holding a bleeding wound on his shoulder.  Suddenly, he saw someone standing just a few steps ahead. It was a woman covered in a dark cloak. She looked like a statue, staring at the ground, the wind moving her clothes around. 

"Hey." Brendon said. "Are you okay?"

She didn't even look his way. 

"Come closer." he heard a soft voice, and was a little spooked at how it sounded so close to his ear. 

He took hesitant steps towards the woman, who suddenly moved so fast her figure was a blur and stood inches away from Brendon. 

And he was about to say something, but she placed a slim, delicate finger on his lips and stared at him with big, innocent eyes. 

"Nothing is real, Bren." she spoke softly. "Don't believe what you see. Listen, and listen very carefully. I can't let them find me, I was not supposed to do some things. But everyone deserves a second chance, even me, don't you think? You have a strong mind, but a vulnerable heart. I need you to shut down your heart. Rip it out of your chest if necessary."

"Why?" he asked, stepping backwards a little. He didn't like the way she called her 'Bren'. How did she know that in the first place was really creepy. 

"The Joseph kid stopped him. He took a shot to the head but he's not gone, no. War isn't gone either. And if they take him out of his cell it will be a thousand times worse. He will find the rest of us and make us pick sides. Don't let them. It's something not meant to be controlled."

"Who's him?"

"The red-eyed demon." she chanted, and started fading away with the wind. "Don't let the red-eyed demon out of his cage."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Pete woke up, he was still lying on the diner table, but it was dark now. He must've been out for a couple hours. Not enough time apparently, since he could still hear some ringing and screaming in his ears. 

He felt strangely numb, like he had taken too many painkillers and was starting to feel drowsy. He tried to get up without making noise, but let out a little yelp at the weird feeling in his chest. It was as if little tiny pieces were inside his ribcage. 

He looked around to see if he had woken someone up, and saw Serpent asleep over a table, and Alpha was sitting by his side, completely awake. 

He looked at him once, and turned his head to keep staring out the window. Believer supposed he was standing guard while Serpent rested, but was he mad at him? 

Should he try to talk to him about it? 

He let himself fall hard on the table, and started shaking shortly after. It was cold, but he was sweating, making his clothes stick to his skin. He could have asked for a blanket, but Believer was sometimes arrogant and full of pride. So if Alpha didn't want to give him, his wounded brother, a blanket to spend the night, then he wouldn't ask for one, even if he froze to death

He didn't sleep either. He would like to say it was because he didn't feel like it, but really it was because the cold was incredibly bitter that night and his body was shaking so violently it seemed like he was having a seizure. 

Despite that, he kept staring at Alpha who kept staring out the window, both ignoring each other intensely. When Alpha's eyelids started closing, he shook Serpent out of his sleep and collapsed. 

Serpent blinked a couple of times and stood up, stretched a little and looked at the sky thoughtfully. He carried Alpha into a mattress and threw a blanket over him, to which Alpha hummed, pleased. 

Believer frowned and pouted like a little kid. Why couldn't he get a blanket? Was it some kind of punishment? 

But Serpent came back with a blanket and carefully covered him with it. He even rubbed him a little so he felt warmer. Believer's heart clenched painfully. How could he even _think_ such horrible things of his family when it was obvious that Serpent cared for him even if he was bad and annoying to them? 

"Is he mad at me?" he whispered, and wasn't sure if Serpent heard him. 

It wasn't the first time he asked Serpent that question. Believer himself could say that he was, sometimes, very problematic. And Phoenix being the leader and himself, always got extremely worried and therefore extremely angry. He would never forget that time he found Phoenix crying out of anger and telling him he was reckless, that he was gonna get himself killed and that that was driving him crazy. 

After doing something stupid that endangered himself or the others, Phoenix would storm out of the room and Serpent would follow him. After that Believer would ask Serpent how bad the situation was. 

"Yeah." Serpent answered, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "But Pete, after you fell to the ground, we thought you were dead. I myself am pretty pissed."

"Why?"

"Why? You dare to ask why! You took Blurryface by the arms and it was obvious he was burning you. You asked Spooky Jim to shoot his lover, even though he stated many times that no one would kill Blurryface. I don't know if you heard, but we screamed for you to stop, to let go, but you didn't listen."

"I..."

"And then we see Blurryface, the powerful man that had been killing people with his bare hands, stare you down and make you fall with... An awful sound. And we thought you were dead, we thought Blurryface had snapped your neck and that you were gone. So yes, Alpha is mad at you for pulling that kind of stunt."

"But I'm not dead..." he tried to argue. "I know it was a stupid move, but I'm okay..."

"You have to understand that Joe is..." Serpent started saying, but stopped suddenly and bit his lip. 

"You better not say what I think you were going to say."

"We lost Patrick." Serpent said, finally, and it felt so weird to pronounce his name outloud after what had happened. 

That simple sentence made something inside him spark, and Serpent noticed it. 

"I didn't..."

"We haven't lost Patrick." Pete whispered in an angry growl. "He is not dead."

"I didn't mean it like that." Serpent said, looking sad all of a sudden. "He's not with us, okay? And after what he said through the radio the other day Joe feels responsible for us. And the thought of losing you hit him pretty hard. He feels like if you had died, he would have disappointed Patrick, given he asked him to take care of us."

Pete didn't say anything else. He was feeling tired and he didn't want to keep filling his head with worries. Serpent wasn't going to get any more sleep until sunrise, so he sat down besides him in silence. He wondered if he could stand guard for a while. Then he thought it wasn't even worth asking. 

"Am I really okay, though?" Pete asked. He couldn't have healed from a Blurryface attack just like that. 

"You will be." Serpent said, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders. "You've had broken bones before, you'll heal in a couple weeks. And we have enough painkillers to keep you sane, so you're gonna be okay."

Broken bones, huh. Why though? Why would Blurryface break his ribs but _not_ kill him? The guy was supposed to be like, the embodiment of evil. It seemed vague, not worthy of such a powerful entity. 

Still, there were bigger things to think about. Like what were they going to do now? They had lost the battle, it was yet another victory for BL/ind and they seemed to be weaker than ever. Even done for. Like the war was over. Better Living Industries had successfully erradicated the rebel community. 

Every man and woman was now under their control. They were all the same, no differences or anything out of line. There were no more signs of self-expression or any other act that could compromise BL/ind's desires. 

Were they really done for? Was it time to drop the masks and lower the rayguns? 

While being sleep-deprived, he started thinking about what to do. His life now revolved around being a rebel, what would he do if suddenly he had to stop? 

"Hey, Andy?" he said, sighing deeply. 

"Yeah?"

"What would we do if... Better Living won?"

"If they won?"

"Yeah, I mean, we wouldn't fight them anymore.  It would be pointless. They would still chase us around and if they got to us they would probably kill us for 'war crimes'. So... Would we continue running even though there's no purpose anymore?"

Serpent fell silent. His dark eyes were wandering around the room and the dim moonlight shone over the lines and colors that covered his arms. He seemed... Small. 

"The Zones and Battery City can't be the only thing on earth." he said, thoughtfully. "There has to be more out there so... That's what I would do at least. Get out. BL/ind can't be controlling the whole world. I would take a car and drive straight forward, see what I can find. Maybe change name and leave all this behind."

Pete pondered his answer deeply. It sounded like a good backup plan, if everything went to shit, but he felt like there was something missing. 

"You need to get sleep."

"I can't."

"Well, there's still a sleeping pill if you want to knock yourself out."

That sounded so tempting, but it didn't feel right. He didn't deserve it, if someone did it was Alpha, or Serpent. Not him. 

"Have you ever missed someone so hard it hurts?" Pete asked. Pete was definitely the guy who asked existential questions very late at night. They all knew that, and they would hit him in the face with pillows or kick him softly. But now Serpent was the only one awake and kind of in the same mood. 

"I guess not." 

"I really miss Mikey." he said, and Serpent raised his eyebrows when he heard that name. Guess it didn't matter anymore. So Kobra Kid was named Mikey, huh? 

"I kind of miss the guy too, you know?" Serpent said, smirking a little. "Given how often he was at our house."

"I miss that too." Pete said, actually smiling at the thought of him and Mikey goofing around in the rooms. "The storage house."

"Yeah. The diner is nice too, but... It's not ours." 

"I hate missing them, Andy." Pete whispered. "I miss Mikey to death, I miss our petty little house. I really... Really miss Patrick. I even miss Bachelor and Fever a little. And it hurts, you know? The feeling in your chest, when you just really want to be with someone."

"Oh God, Patrick..."

Indeed, Andy. That was missing from the runaway plan. They couldn't just drop everything now and run. Pete closed his eyes and pretended to sleep, but really his head was running wild with plans. 

It was time to not listen to his leader's orders one last time. 

He was going to get Patrick out. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ashlynne was never afraid of leadership. She had watched generations go through it and they always came up with something new. Now it was her turn to make the hard desitions and keep everyone alive. 

The world was counting on her. 

But she being in command may be more important than any of the others. She held the reins in a critical point in history. A milestone, perhaps. 

Special Industry for Guidance of the Heart and Talent was no longer a secret to the world. She had pulled it out of the shadows, because she considered it was time to stop hiding and actually do something. 

The elders might have called her reckless, but she thought everything she did had risks, and she was willing to take them. If she made the right moves, she could actually put an end to a war that had been going on for decades. 

Ashlynne was never afraid of leadership. No leader had cracked under the pressure before, and she wasn't going to be the first one. Someone needed to be sane in that ship. 

Something Ashlynne was also not afraid of, was Better Living Industries. She had grown up seeing the atrocities they did. She no longer flinched at the sight of such things. She was sure Better Living did fear them. They feared _her_. It wasn't the first time S.I.G.H.T and BL/ind stood on opposite sides. 

But now things were different. Ashlynne was no longer sitting behind lines hopping they would win. She was in charge of winning. And winning seemed a little hard in that moment. 

Korse's move had thrown her off a little bit. It just... Didn't make any sense. BL/ind had always been like a virus. Exterminate everything that's inconvenient. It was characteristic of them to always play offensive. 

But Korse wasn't playing offensive. Not at all. He was laying back, not a care in the world. 

_You started this. You go first._

It was a provocation, an incitement. A 'come at me with everything you've got.'

And Ashlynne wasn't so sure about that. She had a plan, obviously, but was now starting to see it's flaws. It wasn't _flexible_. She needed to think fast. Act fast. 

Getting Blurryface back and into her side wasn't fast. 

Using Gerard Way's potential wasn't fast either, given how unstable he was. He can't be used while he's on suicide watch. 

Gerard Way. Oh Gerard Way and his request. Which she still had to fullfill. And currently, she had no idea how. She could swear the rebels were now hiding _from her_. It was like trying to catch cockroaches. 

"Miss Ashlynne." a voice came up through the speakers.

"What is it." she snapped back. She didn't have time to waste on petty little things, so that better be important. 

"It's Hesitant Alien, miss."

That couldn't be good. 

"What about him?"

"He's asking to see you." the guy sounded a little scared, his voice was trembling through the speaker. Gerard Way was a rebel. Rebels could be scary when they were driven by emotion. They could get physical too. He must not be asking nicely. 

"I'm busy, what does he want." 

"He... Appears to be looking for someone that was in battle. He says you told him that everyone who was found alive was here."

"And it's the truth, if he could tell me who he's looking for, I may be able to help him."

There was a pause.

"He wants to do it himself."

Dammit. Rebels could be so difficult sometimes. 

"Well tell Gerard things don't work that way around here." She said, her voice stern and serious. "He'll have to wait. Remember, he's on suicide watch _and_ he's a recovering addict. _Do not_ let him out of that wing, you understand?"

"Yes, miss."

Ashlynne sighed. She would have to wait a long time before Gerard Way could be useful. She figured, she should just... Attack. See how that goes and keep working on her long-term plans, which were Gerard and Tyler. She had to deal with problems like that all the time, but she was thankful Josh hadn't given her any. 

He just kind of... Walked around the ship at night like a ghost which was a little creepy, but other than that he was virtually harmless. 

She had the resources to attack. All she needed to do was set a target and give the order. It wasn't her style, to go out on the enemy like that but she felt like she was running out of time. 

But if some rebels with just a raygun and willpower could withstand a war with BL/ind, Ashlynne and S.I.G.H.T definitely could too. 

If Korse wanted to play that way, they would play that way. 

She was about to press the button to inform her new plan of attack, when a transmition interrupted her actions. 

"Fuck! What now!?" she yelled. "Is it Gerard again?"

"Yes, miss." the voice sounded a lot more insecure now. 

"Is he still acting like a spoiled teenager? Throwing a tantrum in the hall?"

"More or less, miss."

"Tell me what is going on!"

"We believe is the abstinence kicking in so..."

"He's aggresive, and desperate, and delusional, I get it, he's not the only one here with that kind of problem. I trust you to figure out this things by yourself!"

"But miss, the standard protocol says to make use of force if..."

"Yes, and?! Gerard may be special but he can't do whatever the hell he wants. He is not in charge, and he is not in the position of making demands any longer. I don't want him banging at the walls like I assume he is doing right now because of the screaming I hear in the background."

"How shall we procced, miss?"

Learn to think for yourself, for starters. Ashlynne didn't have time to be solving minor disturbances in the recovery wings. 

"He needs to calm down. Sedate him."

There was a pause. 

"Are you sure, miss?"

"Did I fucking stutter?" 

Something Ashlynne didn't appreciate was people below her questioning her orders. 

"No, miss, is that Mr Way doesn't like needles..."

"Do I sound like I care? I myself will stab him in the neck with a syringe if he doesn't behave."

"...yes, miss."

"Drag him into his room and don't let him out until I say so."

"Yes, miss."

"Now, we will attack one of BL/ind's bases, with our heavy weaponry."

"Which one, miss?"

"Doesn't matter. They want a taste of our power so we'll give them a mouthful. Tell me when all is ready."

"Yes, miss."

Ashlynne sat back and stared through the big glass windows, seeing the clear blue sky with no clouds in it. Suddenly, a thought popped into her mind, but upon analizing it she realized she couldn't do anything about it, so she just whispered:

"Let's just pray the base we attack isn't the one American Phoenix is in."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gerard was suffocating. He needed to get out somehow. He also needed Frank right about now. It had been weeks since he came on board and everything in his head was happening so fast it was dizzying. 

At first, he had cried. A lot. For all the things he had lost and all the deaths he was somehow responsible for. He stayed in bed for days on end, not wanting to move no matter what the nurses told him. They didn't seem to understand that Party Poison was gone. Hesitant Alien was not a hero, he wasn't brave and right now he was broken. He could see the nurses giving him looks full of pity. 

"Look at him. That's the great Party Poison. Or, at least, what's left of him. He's defeated and now condemned to lay down as his heart slowly comes to a stop."

"It's tragic, seeing a glorious hero dying out like this."

"It's hard to imagine him in full attire shooting dracs and saving lives. All I see is a broken man."

They were all right. He was dying, he could _feel_ it. Specially with the ache and burn of his veins asking for relief, his brain running even wilder than before. Take the pills you need to take them you need them come on do anything to get them you'll feel better afterwards please please.

He used to run. Yes, run. When you live in the desert you _need_ to be able to run miles under the sun at a good pace. So he did, run around the wing at top speed and scare the hell out of the nurses. It kept the thoughts from becoming too much, since all he could think of was among the lines of 'my legs are burning holy shit.', 'I can't breathe, help.', 'I think I'm gonna pass out.' and 'was that a wall?'

__He would wake up in his bed all cleaned up and with fluids attached to his arm. God, he hated the little bag of liquids so much. He even consider it to be drugs, or some magical medicine that was the solution to everything._ _

__And because he needed them so often, the nurses had completely ignored his pleads and cries for mercy and had permanently stuck a needle to the inside of his elbow. It had taken them a total of eleven minutes to put the thing in place, and five other tries to keep Gerard from taking it out._ _

__"It's more convenient." they had tried to reason with him. "You won't have to get pierced three times a day."_ _

__He didn't like any of his possibilities. He didn't like to look down on his arm and see a tube sticking out. He had scratched his way through the bandages and took the needle out of his arm five times. And five times they put it back. Gerard was only making things harder for himself._ _

__A couple weeks later, when he had learned to ignore it, a thought popped into his mind._ _

__What if Frank wasn't dead?  
What if S.I.G.H.T had rescued him before he could get shot? _ _

__What if he was _in the ship_ but wasn't allowed into the recovery wing where he was currently trapped? _ _

__His brain was just trying to make some sense, and the most logical thought was that if he could see Frank, everything would be okay. Because Gerard was desperate, scared and lonely. He _needed_ Frank to be alive. _ _

__He tried to get out, screaming for him and wanting to look for him himself. All that got him was some dudes pinning him down and injecting him with sedatives. They dragged his drug-induced body into his room and locked the door._ _

__"No..." he whispered, trying to fight the urgue to sleep. "Frank... I need him, Frankie, where are you?... Where are... You?"_ _

__He didn't even make it to the bed. He fell asleep on the floor, curled up and with his name still dancing on his tongue._ _

__~~~~~~~~~~~~_ _

__Patrick wasn't always a fighter. He used to be this little chubby kid who used to get shoved around a lot. And when he got out of Battery City, it wasn't so easy either. There was no one to help him out, teach him how to survive or even offer him a place to stay._ _

__It was only him, and Joe. Both young and naïve with no guidance whatsoever. You would think all the situations he had gone through would have hardened him, made him close up and hide behind an armour of rudeness and disinterest._ _

__The desert had hardened him, yes, molded him with pain and exhaustion into what he was now. But he didn't let the world change him for bad. He treated the world better than the world treated him. He wanted to be the savior of all those kids who were lost and just wanted to be free._ _

__He didn't have a savior back when he was younger, so he became just that. That's how he got Pete and Andy, that along with Joe would become his treasure, his priority. His family. And he was willing to die in order to protect that family._ _

__But there's a very fine line between being nice, and being stupid. Patrick practically lived on that line. He had to constantly be reminded that he shouldn't put other's wants over his own needs, that it wasn't selfishness, it was self-respect._ _

__The thing was that Patrick was extremely good at taking care of others, but terribly awful at taking care of himself. He forgot to do basic stuff when he was stressed. Pete, Joe and Andy kept him sane, made him snap out and told him when enough was enough, as he seemed to forget that often._ _

__Being a dick would've been so much easier. It's always way easier. If he had been a dick, he wouldn't be trapped in a cell. He would still have his left hand. But, then again, he wouldn't have met Pete and Andy. Joe and him would have been alone._ _

__Nice people like him had a limit. And when someone crossed the line with them, they turned into someone you should absolutely fear._ _

__And Patrick was done being nice._ _

__If Korse walked through that door to give another speech of greatness, he would punch him with his remaining hand. He didn't care if the guy was almost two feet taller than him._ _

__He had spent weeks caged in that cell and he wasn't having more of it. He grew weaker every hour and seriously questioned _why_ Korse hadn't killed him. Maybe he was letting him starve to death, slowly cutting short his supply of cardboard-tasting food. _ _

__What angered him the most was that he had to watch Korse and his army leave the base for battle and he couldn't do anything about it. He had to stay in a solitary base not knowing what was going on outside. Pete, Andy and Joe could've been killed for all he knew._ _

__Everyone could've been killed, he could be the last one standing and he was trapped like a rat in a lab. But in the back of his mind, behind the anger and frustration, he knew he was done for. He prayed every night for his family to be okay, to be alive. But he? He was a dead man._ _

__Just waiting for Korse to finish him off or his body to give up. Either way, he wanted it to come fast. He was tired after all._ _

__American Phoenix didn't want to die. But given the circumstances, he found comfort in the thought of him dying and by that keeping his family safe. Suddenly, every living thing in the base started moving. He looked in between the bars and saw Korse shouting orders. Everyone was being so loud that Patrick didn't understand a thing._ _

__Korse divided the remains of his army into two groups, and only one of them started moving out of the base. The other one took their positions as they did normally. When Korse noticed Patrick staring at him, he shrugged and said:_ _

__"Sorry, little Phoenix. But you're gonna have to stay. You see, there's an attack incoming and we have no idea how this is gonna play out. So my smart move is to get the fuck out. But don't worry! They will stay here with you until they die or the attack is over. I don't know what's gonna happen to you, but really I don't care. This might be the last time we see each other. I really hope it is. Goodbye, goodbye!"_ _

__And then he was gone. Patrick could see a pinch of fear on the dracs' faces, like deep down they didn't want to be there. Because it was about to get really ugly._ _

__It felt like that was going to be the end. The end he had been waiting for._ _

__Patrick knew it was the end when the first explosion shook the whole building and the ceiling started collapsing._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I finally finished finals and now I can dedicate more time to this story :)


	3. Roadsigns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pete is determined to get his friend back, even though everyone seems to believe his actions are in vain. 
> 
> Being in the underground or roaming around the roads doesn't protect anyone from trouble.

Pete was never known for being cautious. Or prudent in any way. He was explosive. He spoke his mind about everything and didn't keep things inside. He wasn't shy, he would totally go up to someone and say 'hey, you're cute, let's go out'. Just like that, without so many detours. 

Hell, he kissed Mikey, who was (almost) a complete stranger after a battle and then passed out. So yeah, he was pretty smooth. 

It was good for Pete to be in a group, despite all the stuff he put them through. Because Patrick was quite literally 80% of his impulse control. Without him he would jump into a mission with no backup plan and a very slim chance of success. 

Like he was doing right now. 

It had been a couple weeks. Even Pete himself was surprised he had managed to stay still for so long. Well, the amount of painkillers he was taking helped that a little, since they made him so loopy and either Joe or Andy had to keep a constant eye on him. It was like watching over a toddler. 

But now he could stand and do his own thing. He had found a backpack and he took it as a sign, that he should set his plan into action. He filled it with water bottles, a can of baked beans, a radio transmitter, and some medical supplies. He didn't exactly know what he was going to encounter. He never did. 

Andy saw him first walking towards the door, and stepped in front of him with a sarcastic smile on his face. 

"Where are you going?" he asked, blocking the door with his arms. 

"Out." he answered simply. Like going out with a backpack full of supplies was so normal. 

"Believer." he said. Oh they'd switched to rebel names now. Meaning he knew that the moment Pete crossed that door he would be Black Believer on a mission. "You can't go out on your own."

When people told Believer something he couldn't do, he tended to try and prove them wrong. Results were not always guaranteed. But this time he was able to squeeze himself through a window. 

Believer started walking down the road, not sure where he was going. He just planned to get far enough from the diner and then figure out something. He heard the steps behind him and Alpha's voice saying:

"Where the fuck do you think you're going?" he sounded pissed. 

"I'm bringing Phoenix back."

Silence. Believer continued on, and Serpent stepped up and placed his hand on his shoulder, trying to hold him back gently. No, nobody was going to hold him back, he was going to save his friend. 

"Your ribs are not fully healed yet." Serpent whispered, concern dangling in his voice. 

"I don't care." Believer answered coldly. 

"They could break again." he insisted. 

"It's dangerous out there, Believer." Alpha said, his voice stern. "You're not in good conditions to go out into the desert on your own."

"I don't care." he repeated, but that didn't shut them up. 

"Your ribs could pierce your lung. You could die."

"I don't care!" Believer shouted, stopping on his tracks and turning around to face them. "How many times do I have to tell you!? I don't care if I die! And neither should you!"

"Pete..." Serpent breathed out. He sounded hurt. Alpha just looked mad. 

"You're acting like a child." he said, staring him down. "You're gonna come back inside and act like an adult for once."

Believer spun on his heels and started walking.  He didn't make it so far. 

"It's an order." 

He stopped. Everything stopped. Serpent looked at Alpha as if he had just kicked a puppy and Believer clenched his fists tightly. 

"What the fuck did you just say?" Believer growled, turning around once again. 

"I said, it's an order." Alpha repeated. "You're going on a suicidal mission that won't do any good to anyone. Get back inside."

"You are not my leader." Believer said, very slowly. "I only follow Phoenix's orders. Not yours."

Alpha sighed and frowned, so Believer walked up to him until he was inches away from his face. 

"You're only seeing what you want to see." he whispered. "I am incharge now."

"Listen, buddy." Believer retorted. "This God complex you've got going on is absolutely ridiculous, you need to go back to your place. And you need to stop pretending you're Phoenix! You're not our leader and you will never be!"

"Phoenix is gone!" Alpha shouted back. "You keep fantasizing about saving him without realizing that he's already dead!!"

"Shut up!" 

Believer punched him right in the face, making him fall onto the ground. Suddenly, Serpent wrapped his strong arms around his waist, stopping him from moving. 

"You two need to calm the fuck down." he demanded. "We've already lost someone and now you're tearing us apart even more. If anything we should stay together."

"What's the point of being together if you two fucks are just giving up on our _leader_. I'm not gonna let that happen."

"Let him go, Serpent." Alpha said, wiping the blood off his lip. 

"What?" Serpent asked, confused. 

"If he wants to go out and get himself killed, then I'm not gonna stop him, and neither are you. Let him go."

Serpent hesitated for a moment, but then he let his arms drop to his sides. Believer took a deep breath and started walking away, not caring if that was the last time he saw them. 

Phoenix was not dead. And he was going to find him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

Frank was sitting on his mattress, playing with a loose thread of his bandages, that were still wrapped around his calf. Meanwhile, little chubby fingers were running through his long hair, braiding it neatly. 

"Are you done?" he asked. 

"Almost done." the kid answered, a big smile on her face. 

"Is it looking good?"

"Yes, very pretty." 

He smiled. Up to this point Frank was just waiting for his leg to heal so he could get out. He talked to Dark Spades about it, and he too wanted to find Gerard. He had also asked him if there was any way he could help him out. The poor guy had to work himself out everyday and just did it with a smile and never complained. 

His brother, Crinsom Clovers was old enough to help him and be his kind of nurse, and you could see them walking around together carrying supplies. 

But his little sister, Winged Hearts, was still a kid and Dark Spades couldn't watch over her all the time. Therefore, Frank was left to be a babysitter. 

Winged Hearts was only eight years old, and hadn't seen much of the desert. She was still cheerful and innocent, unknowing of everything that happened in the surface. She would have to learn how to survive at some point, but Frank was grateful she could be a child a little longer before she had to become a soldier. 

She was also really sweet. She liked Frank a lot it seemed, she played with him and would often share her 'secret candy brother should not know about' with him. Frank grew attached to the girl, actually being happy to take care of her while her brothers worked. 

"How did you injure your leg?" she had asked one time

"I fought a giant." Frank had answered dramatically. 

"Really??" her blue eyes shone, amazed. "Did you defeated it all by yourself??"

"Nah, I wasn't alone. I had the help of a great warrior."

"A great warrior?"

"Yes, he had fiery red hair and wore a yellow mask. He was awesome, really."

"Was that giant really big?"

"Yeah, _really_ big. Like, this big." Frank had thrown his arms up, and Hearts had stared at the space (which was not much) like the giant was standing in front of her.

"Weren't you scared?" she asked. 

"A little. But we worked together and like, got one of his eyes."

"Awesome!"

And like that had started the tradition of him telling Hearts epic stories about him and a great red-haired warrior. It distracted her from the urgues her little body had once in a while. Dark Spades had told him the whole story about them and his sibling's drug problem. 

Still, Frank cared for the girl as if she was his daughter. He let her play with his hair, braid it and put shit in it. She loved to put bows and dry flowers on his hair, telling him he was so pretty. And Frank let her be. He would never admit he kind of enjoyed it. 

Suddenly, Frank heard some panic-filled voices and murmurs, and wondered what was going on. Because he was stubborn and didn't listen to Dark Spades, he got up from his mattress and limped a little to see what the hell was going on. He saw people running and coughing, covering their faces with clothes and rushing out. There was a thick, purple smoke coming in from somewhere, and Frank had the horrible feeling it was toxic. 

Hearts hugged his good leg and looked up to him with frightened eyes. Frank looked around for Dark Spades or Crimson Clovers but couldn't see clearly through the people and the gas. He knew they needed to get out of there before the gas killed them. More importantly, he needed to get Hearts out. 

The problem was that they were on the other side of the base and the nearest way out was almost 40 feet away and the path was covered in purple gas. It was spreading fast, and Frank thought he could hear someone shouting to get out of there. 

"Hearts, we have to get out of here, quick." he said. "Listen to me, you see the exit? I need you to run to it as fast as you can."

"B-but there's s-smoke everywhere..." she trembled, and held onto Frank tighter. 

"I know, but it can't hurt you if you don't breathe it in. Just hold your breath and run towards the exit. You can shield your eyes and make it to the other side, okay?"

"I-I'm scared." she said, and Frank crouched besides her to look her in the eye. 

"I was scared too, when I fought that giant, remember?" he said with a soothing voice. "But sometimes you need to be brave, and I'm sure you can be braver than me, by far."

"...really?"

"Yeah, think about your brothers who are on the other side and you need to get to them. But to do that you need to be brave and cross, can you do that?"

She looked at the purple gas and then at the exit, and balled her little fists. 

"Yes."

"That's my girl." he smiled at her and watched her as she took a deep breath and sprinted towards the exit. Her little figure disappeared in the smoke and Frank also held his breath and waited for her to appear on the other side. He prayed so that her small lungs could handle it. 

After some very tense seconds, he saw a blond head surface and someone helped her up and out. Frank let out the breath he was holding and was thankful Hearts made it. Now he had to figure out how _he_ was going to make it. 

He could hold his breath longer than Hearts, sure, but he was considerably slower. He wasn't sure he could handle the pain of his leg and the effort it would take him to cross over. But it was either try or die. So he took a deep breath and hoped for the best. 

It was really hard to see and the gas burned his eyes, but he kept limping as fast as he could. He could see the light, the outside, but he suddenly had the realization that, well... 

_I'm not gonna make it._ , he thought. 

His lungs were burning and his head was starting to blur. He needed air desperately but there was still a few feet to cover and he felt like he couldn't hold his breath any longer or limp another inch. 

He fell. The fall knocked the air out of him, which formed a little cloud in front of him. He tried to regain his breath and crawl, but the gas got into his lungs and burned his throat, made his eyes water and his head hurt.

He coughed, and crawled a little bit in a last attempt to get out, but it wasn't enough. He went limp, and passed out shortly after. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Brendon didn't know what the fuck to do. He felt like he had been trusted with a very important message. A 'could save the whole world' kind of message. But he didn't know who to deliver it to. He had this need of passing the responsibility on to someone else and just disappear for a while. 

He wanted nothing to do with the rebel world. He wanted to just be a guy in sparkly clothes minding his own business. He didn't ask for a mystical lady to give him a task to complete. 

He wanted the world to leave him alone. 

But that just wasn't in the world's plans. 

Because Brendon was a magnet for strange people and just kept bumping into the craziest of characters you could find in the desert, he saw some figures up ahead. 

He hated seeing figures up ahead.

But these weren't a mystical white-haired woman, these looked more like soldiers. They were dressed in black, with a navy blue eye symbol on their chests. It looked like a gang or something. 

They came up to Brendon and stopped, looking at him through sunglasses. It was obvious these people weren't common rebels. Common rebels didn't have that kind of uniform and they sure as hell didn't have sunglasses. In this desert if someone had sunglasses then it was a bad sign. 

"Nicotined Bachelor?" one of the men asked. Brendon didn't answer, he just stepped back a little bit. They didn't look like they worked for BL/ind, but Brendon had learned not to trust anyone he didn't know. 

"You shall come with us." other guy said.

"Why?" Brendon asked, frowning. Who were this people? And who did they think they were? 

"It's for a greater good, Nicotined Bachelor. You're needed in S.I.G.H.T's lines as an important part of the rebel community."

Brendon actually chuckled. 

"Listen, guys." he scoffed. "I don't know _what_ the hell are you talking about or _where_ did you come from or _how_ do you fit into the picture. What I do know, is that out here we rebels make our own rules. So no thanks, I have absolutely no intention of going with you."

The guys didn't say anything. Brendon, being done with life, started walking in the opposite direction, because who cared, it's not like he wanted to keep going forward anyway. 

But suddenly, he felt a pair of hands circle around his wrist trying to restrain him. Well that was unexpected. He got free with one harsh movement and turned around to face his opponent. 

In a rush of adrenaline he remembered all his training. Legs apart, knees bent, fists up. His eyes firm on the guy's chest area, ready to predict his movements. He saw a punch coming right at his face, so he ducked down and swinged his fist at the soft abdomen in front of him and smirked a little when that knocked the guy off his feet. 

He didn't get to feel good about it for much longer since the other guys came at him as well. 

Brendon was furious. He had all this... Repressed energy inside of him that needed to come out somehow. And what better way than getting into a fight with some dudes he could easily beat up. 

Or so he thought. He would have totally won that fight. If one of the guys hadn't had a taser on him. Brendon had a gun, yes, but he wasn't going to just shoot these random guys he met in the desert. He wasn't that kind of man. 

The electricity ran through his whole body and when he fell to the ground his head was burning and he was suddenly out of breath. 

"You shall come with us. You're important to Miss Ashlynne's plans."

Brendon decided he didn't like this whole S.I.G.H.T thing nor this Ashlynne person. Who was she and _why_ did she send soldiers with tasers to kidnap him. _Why_ did she have soldiers that she could order around? Did she think she could make Brendon into his puppet or something? 

Was she like, a female Korse? 

Was S.I.G.H.T like, BL/ind's equally evil organization sibling? 

The desert didn't need another set of those things. Hadn't they had enough? 

The men cuffed his hands together and propped him up. They pushed him and forced him to walk for a while, Brendon struggling to get free the whole time. He wasn't scared though. He felt like he had lived through a lot, was tired and just couldn't be bothered. 

But when he saw a fucking airship decend from the sky and open it's gates for them, he started to freak out. Were this guys people at all? Were they aliens? 

And this little airship just flew somehow into a much bigger airship that seemed like a house with many many long corridors. They guided him in and through that maze of a place and just threw him into a room. 

The door locked with a click and Brendon just sighed. He thought he was alone, but when he turned around he saw a guy on a bed that looked extremely pale and small, and another one sleeping with their head on the edge of said bed, like a critical patient and the asleep relative.

There weren't any machines attached to him, so it just looked like they were both sleeping. Upon paying closer attention, Brendon realized this weren't just some random strangers. 

If it wasn't Blurryface himself, by now his face was etched in every rebel's mind and was accompanied by flashbacks of blood and screams. Because that was just what Blurryface meant and represented for them. 

But the guy in the bed wasn't exactly the killing machine they had seen. It was the boy, the human that was always by Spooky Jim's side and in reality he was struggling with his blackened neck and hands. 

And of course, the other guy was Jim, with his bright pink hair pushed back. He knew that just because he had spent some time talking to the rebels in the diner when he dropped by. He wondered if _they_ remembered him. 

He didn't want to wake them up, since Blurryface looked so... peaceful. Jim on the other hand was frowning and had dark shadows below his eyes. 

They didn't seem like prisoners. Had the soldiers tased them and forced them into the ship too? Or was that only him? 

Brendon sat down on the floor, leaned against the wall and sighed. What was he supposed to do now? Wait for someone to come, kick some ass and try to escape? Well, escaping from a giant ship suspended thousands of feet in the air seemed a little impossible. 

But if Brendon had learned something, was that _no one_ could force him to do anything he didn't want to. Because he had escaped from Battery City _to be free._

And he wasn't about to let what happened to Ryan happen to him. Or to anyone. Not in a million years. 

As he was there sitting, the words the woman had said started spinning around in his head, making no sense at all. He needed _something_ to understand what they meant, and exactly why they had this sense of urgency in them. He looked around the white room, and his eyes wandered until they stopped on Blurryface. 

And then it clicked. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

Believer walked angrily down the road, with the radio on his hand trying to pick up a frequency. Doctor D had the habit of changing it once in a while. Meaning all the time. Finally the static cleared and Believer was able to transmit what he needed. 

"D? Are you there? It's me, Black Believer, from the Youngbloods."

" _Believers never die, what can I do for yah._ " he answered miraculously. It was almost impossible to contact him sometimes. 

"I'm looking for American Phoenix, can you trace back the call he did and tell me exactly which base is he trapped in?"

" _Emmm, well..._ "

"Can you do it or not, D?" he pressed. He was in a hurry, with no time to waste. 

" _Yes, yes I can but... It was a long time ago and..._ "

"If you say the word 'dead' next to his name I swear I will find you and kick you in the face."

" _Okay, okay, geez. I'll track your call and his and you can connect the dots. Give me a moment._ "

Finally some cooperation. He stopped walking and waited for D to answer. The diner was nowhere to be seen, and neither was... Anything really. Just the dusty road and some yellowish plants. 

He wasn't so tired, yet. But his physical condition was definitely weaker from all those days lying down. He silently prayed for the base to be near by. Or at least not a hundred miles away. 

" _Good news, kid. Walk up to the next roadsign, turn left and all forward. You should see it. The field is completely open, no place to hide. But then again, it's not like you're known for your stealth. Good luck, and be careful._ "

After that he went off, and probably changed his frequency again. He got lucky then. As he was walking, he started to make a plan. If he wanted to get both of them out and alive he couldn't just barge in. A base like that should have some ventilation system he could crawl into. He was small after all. 

The plan was incredibly sloppy, but Believer trusted it to work. If not, we would think of a plan B. And C and D if necessary. But he wasn't about to back down. The roadsign had a big 50 painted on it, and was fading slowly.

As if someone here respected the speed limits. He turned left and tried to see a building of some sort on the skyline, but saw nothing. He guessed it was just farther from there. 

The sun was shining strong, making him sweat and a little hard to think. He tried to stay focused, walking in a straight line. He didn't want to get lost and have to call D again. He thought about Alpha and Serpent back in the diner probably doing nothing while he was out there in a rescue mission. 

He wanted to see their faces when he came back with Patrick. They really needed him, without Patrick the Youngbloods were a mess. No, actually, Pete was a mess. _He_ needed Patrick to be back and put things in order like only he knew how to. 

After a while, Believer started to worry, because he wasn't seeing any base and he was sure he had been walking for at least an hour. Had D given him wrong directions? 

Just as he was getting desperate, he saw something. Not what he was expecting to see. It wasn't a building. If anything it was the remains of a building. A sinking feeling filled his chest and he started running towards it, denying everything. 

He arrived panting and stood in front of a building in ruins. There were giant metal rods sticking out of the giant pile of cement and cinder. 

"No..." he whispered, and rushed towards the ruins, not very sure of what to do. 

He started digging up in between the debris, grunting and panting as he desperately removed the blocks, hoping and praying for him to appear. Hours passed. His hands slowly started filling with cuts, sweat drenched his clothes and tears watered his eyes. 

He didn't stop. His strength started flattering, but he continued making each heavy block aside until, right when he was about to give up and go home, defeated, he saw something. 

An arm. A dusty, bloodied arm, _that was missing a hand_.

He let out a sigh of pure relief, and disbelief. With tears running down his cheeks, he started removing the last blocks, careful to not make others fall. Finally, he was able to pull his leader out of the ruins. 

Patrick looked awful. 

His blond hair was dirty and sticky with dried blood. His clothes were torn and stained with blood that had already gone brown. His beautiful face was completely covered in dust and bruises, his lips were chapped and bloody and deep shades of purple littered his cheeks and jaw. 

Believer realized, horrified, that he was skinny. The 'I haven't eaten a decent meal in weeks' kind of skinny. His cheekbones were sickly sharp, and his collarbones were worryingly visible. His once strong arms now seemed like they couldn't carry anything too heavy. He placed his ear over his mouth, and held his breath with fear. 

He wasn't breathing. 

"Oh God." he whispered. Serpent had taught him how to do CPR, he could do it. He could totally do it.

With shaky hands he tilted his head slightly back, pinched his nose and placed his mouth over Patrick's. He blew into his throat and then,  placing one hand on top of the other, he started pressing his chest strongly. He counted and even hummed the tune Serpent had taught him. 

"Come on, Patrick." he pleaded, after doing the routine five times without stopping. "Please... Breathe..."

He kept going. He wasn't sure how much time had passed, only that he had started to cry and his movement had become more desperate and erratic. A million things were going through his mind. 

What if he stopped? 

Would he be able to carry his lifeless body back? 

What would Alpha and Serpent say? 

Would it be his fault for not trying hard enough? 

Would he be able to look them in the eye? 

Would he be responsible for his best friend's death? 

He couldn't let that happen. No matter how much his arms hurt or how suffocated and out of breath he felt, he needed go keep going until Patrick started breathing again. 

Suddenly, his body, that had been immobile for so long, jerked upwards. Pete snatched his hands away and watched how Patrick coughed and took a deep breath. Pete let out the air he didn't realize he was holding, and smiled. Patrick slowly opened his beautiful blue-green eyes and blinked a couple times, trying to focus on the blurry image of the person leaning over him.

"...Pete...?" he asked in a low whisper, his voice broken and weak. 

Pete let out a sob and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, holding his head delicately against his chest. He cried, hard, not letting Patrick go but careful not to hurt him any further. He must be so confused and in pain, but he recognized the presence holding him and curled up against the warmth of Pete's body. 

They stayed there, holding each other in a loving embrace, completely silent. He almost lost him. He almost lost him and now he was between his arms, breathing, alive. 

Pete was beyond happy. He was lucky, fortunate, prosperous, cheerful, content, delighted, elated, ecstatic, euphoric, joyful, jubilant, overjoyed and every other word that meant happy in the freaking dictionary. 

He wanted to kiss him. 

So he did. 

He cupped his cheeks and brought his face close to his, sealing their lips together in a soft kiss. He moved his lips against Patrick's dry ones as delicately as he could, and then pulled away only to press their foreheads together, eyes still closed. 

Patrick hadn't closed his eyes. He was tired and his head was spinning, but he lovingly caressed Pete's cheek before melting completely into his touch, letting himself be held by his friend. 

Some moments later, Pete let him lie on the ground while he got something out of his backpack. Then he helped him up and gave him some water, which made him moan in pleasure. 

Pete watched him closely as he slowly ate out of the can, shaking and trying not to eat too fast. Pete looked at the sky and saw it was getting darker. He bit his lip, thinking that they needed to get out of there before nightfall. 

They didn't talk, just looked at each other deeply. Pete felt like he could get lost in Patrick's eyes. Suddenly, he heard the roaring of an engine, and stood up quickly. Patrick looked around, and Pete held his gun close to him, ready to protect him from anything. 

But then, a red truck came into view, and he heard Patrick sigh with a smile. So they had fixed the truck. And now that he thought about it, the Doctor could have told them where he was when he hadn't heard anything from him in a long time. 

Alpha and Serpent jumped out of the truck and rushed towards Patrick, only to find Pete standing in between them menacingly. He was treating them like they were enemies, and kept protecting Patrick with his body. That wiped the smile off Alpha's face, who frowned at him and stood a little bit taller. 

Patrick was smiling too, but stopped when he saw what his friends were doing. He looked at them, confused, and tried to stand up. What had happened? Why weren't they all hugging like a family? 

Pete turned around and saw Patrick's half-hurt half-confused expression and crouched to help him up. He lifted Patrick in his arms bridal style, and his heart clenched when he noticed how light he was. Patrick was so tired he closed his eyes and let himself be carried. But he felt safe, there in Pete's arms everything was going to be okay... 

Pete carried him and jumped into the back of the truck, throwing the cloth over them and closing the little door. He lied there with his arms around Patrick, feeling his breathing in his neck. 

He kissed the top of his head and Patrick hummed in approval. They both lied there with each other and waited for the truck to start. Pete was now going to take care of Patrick, until he could be himself again and put everything in order. 

"Come on, buddy." he said, even though Patrick was probably asleep. "Let's go home."

~~~~~~~~~~~

Ashlynne smiled to herself. Her plans were slowly coming together, and she didn't feel so overwhelmed anymore. She had Nicotined Bachelor now, one more piece the other side didn't have. 

Her offensive move had been successful, and she was sure she shook the enemy a little. It was good, that they knew what they were dealing with. Her project with Blurryface was also going well, and undercover as well. With time, she would have a very powerful piece in her game. 

The only thing she needed to be careful about was not letting Josh find out. That would be a problem given how fond he was of Tyler. He was in love with the guy. 

Ugh, love. It made things so much more difficult sometimes. But it could be an advantage if she knew how to use it. 

Because at War, everything counts. 

Ashlynne wasn't afraid to have her morals questioned. She cared more about the results she could provide. 

In the end, a good player wasn't afraid of sacrificing some pieces if that ultimately gave it the opportunity to corner the King. 

And win.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays to everyone! I hope you have a great time with your loved ones <3


	4. How Easy it is to Fall in Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank is now part of a much bigger family, as he has earned the love of Dark Spades and his little sister, and he protects those who he cares about.  
> Tyler is coming to terms with his own personal demon, while Josh is still waiting for him to wake up, even if Bachelor now tells him something he doesn't want to listen.  
> Meanwhile, Pete finally has Patrick back and it is determined to make him better

Frank had cheated death once. He didn’t think he would do it again. Except this time it wasn’t because of some weird magical will-power, it was just because this time, he wasn’t alone. When he woke up, he was lying on the sand and the sun was shining directly into his eyes. It instantly triggered his rebel instincts, if you were lying on your back on the open; you needed to get out quick before the vultures start circling around you.

Except he couldn’t bolt forward and start running. He simply sat up and rubbed his head, trying to remember exactly how was he alive. He looked around, but there was nothing but sand. He couldn’t see anything that could tell him where he was. In the middle of nowhere, he found himself there quite a lot. Frank wasn’t alone, though. He started recognizing faces, people he had seen wandering around in the refuge. Then he remembered everything, the gas, the screaming, him running towards the exit… but not quite making it.

Suddenly, he was knocked down by a small figure that wrapped its arms around his neck tightly. Frank smiled, caressing the dirty blond hair in front of him.

“Hey, Hearts.” He whispered. “Nice to see you.”

“We thought you were dead!” she said, her blue eyes filling with tears.

“Me too…”

She left Frank feeling baffled and ran through the crowd until he couldn’t see her anymore. The people around Frank were wounded even further, and some were still coughing up purple smoke. They all seemed lost, and scared. Those red-rimmed eyes were frenetically looking for someone to come and say everything was going to be okay. Right now, it seemed like they were all stranded in the middle of the desert and had no idea how to get out. Even how to _survive_ the night, Frank remembered most of this people had lived their whole lives in the underground and knew nothing about how to get around in the outside.

So where was Dark Spades?

Frank tried to get up, bearing the pain on his still wounded leg, and looked around for him. Most of the people were on the ground, so he had a clear view over their heads. Then, out of nowhere, Hearts came back to him and took his hand, guiding him towards a figure that had its head on its hands and was just looking distressed.

“Is that your brother?” Frank asked, and Hearts nodded at him with a serious expression. “Where is Crimson Clovers?”

“Helping some people out.” She answered, sighing. Something about her was different, like she had aged all of a sudden. “Trying to help, at least. He’s not Spades; he’s not used to it, not to this many people. We need him back but he doesn’t seem to listen to anything I say.”

She sounded worried. Frank suspected he knew what was happening to Heart’s sibling, he had seen Party go through it before. He kind of knew how to handle it.

“He’s paralyzed.” He murmured to himself as he slowly approached the sick-looking Dark Spades.

His dark blue hair was spiked in all directions, as if someone had shocked him with a car battery or something. He was visibly trembling even though he was sweating, his hands shaking uncontrollably in front of him. His skin was pale and he was hyper-ventilating, and Frank wasn’t so sure he knew where he was.

“Hey, Spades…” Frank said under his breath, slowly getting closer to him. “It’s me, Ghoul. I’m fine, see?”

He slowly turned his head towards his voice and shook the hair out of his eyes, so Frank got a good look at them. Dark Spades eyes’ were something special, and not quite normal. Frank had seen them change color depending on what he was doing. When he was working, his eyes would turn orange and yellow, warm colors that seemed to soothe you in a special way. He had that touch, that spark that you could follow and never get lost. But now…

His eyes were constantly changing, ranging from angry red to ice-cold blue, to dark green to the purple of bruises. Grey like a storm, black clouds and white lighting, everything all mushed together and shoved into his irises. He saw chaos; he saw hell in those eyes. Frank took his hands between his own and tried to hold his gaze, but he staring into his eyes was starting to fill him with panic and fear as well, and he couldn’t let that happen.

“Ghoul…” he sobbed, looking at his feet. “I…I…can’t feel my fingers…”

He was also insanely cold. Dark Spades was incredibly strong. He carried everyone’s problems on his back and took care of them as a mother would do, and he always did it with a smile and without a complain. But he had seen his home, his shelter, crumble and become poisonous. He probably had to take out the people that couldn’t walk on their own, because no one else would. He probably couldn’t save all of them. And now he was out in the open, not his comfort zone and with a hundred people to look after. Frank assumed he had finally cracked under all that pressure, and now he was panicking.

“That’s okay, you’re gonna be okay.” He said, trying to be the voice of reason.

“I…I don’t know w-w-what to d-do…” he stuttered, and tried to get free from Frank’s grip. “There’s p-people I need to…”

“No, no. It’s enough, Spades. You need to think about yourself, just for one second. The others can wait, you hear me? Think about how _you_ feel.”

“I-I feel…” he babbled, but his breathing was now calmer. It was progress. “S-Scared… all those kids, they’re under my care and I… I don’t feel like I can… like I’m letting them down and…”

“Now that’s a bunch of nonsense.” Frank said, and dared to look at him directly. He saw how scared and confused he was. His world was spinning wildly and now it was Frank’s job to stop it. “Listen to me, Dark Spades, I am not letting you get yourself down like that. Because you are extraordinary. You represent hope for so many people and that is because you have been able to do this for so long. People count on you, and it can get overwhelming sometimes but, you are strong enough to overcome any situation. This? This is just another one of those situations you have to step back and think about. You are a leader, Dark Spades. And you can do this. It is perfectly okay to be scared, but I’m telling you there’s no reason to be. Because you’re the last hope of many of those people who are out there wondering where are you, and the most important thing about that is that they trust you. So why are you not trusting yourself?”

“I don’t know what to do…” he cried, shaking his head.

Frank placed his hands on his shoulder and forced him to stand upright. Like that he was almost a foot taller than him, so Frank had to tilt his head upwards to look at him directly in the eye and say his last words of encouragement.

“But you will. You will figure this out and we will get out of here and into somewhere safe. All of us.”

Dark Spades closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them again, they were a soft greyish pink, but more importantly they were determined, and somehow grateful.

“Thank you.” He said, and Frank knew he really meant it.

“You need to let others take care of you.” He advised him with a serious tone. “Your siblings are worried sick about you.”

“I don’t know what happened to me I just… couldn’t breathe or think straight…” He started rambling, but Frank stopped him before he could get overwhelmed again.

“You had a panic attack.” He explained. “But do not think for one second that is a sign of weakness. You’ll learn to control it on your own if you need to, but there are a lot of people who care about you, and are willing to help you. Like your siblings. Like me.”

“You… care about me?” Dark Spades questioned, looking away from him. Frank frowned. What had happened to him? Why didn’t he see his own value?

“Of course I care about you.” He stated, and started guiding him while rubbing his back. Hearts saw them coming back and ran towards his brother. A smile instantly appeared on his face as he opened his arms to receive the little girl. He kissed her head and carried her for a while.

“I cannot thank you enough for saving her.” He whispered, and Frank just smiled at him.

“You don’t need to, I’m like, her guardian by now.”

He laughed. It sounded a little weird and raspy on his voice but he was slowly coming together. Dark Spades stood over a sand dune and looked over his people. He sighed deeply and handed Hearts to him. Frank stood a few steps back holding his little sister as Spades scanned the surroundings. He saw people’s eyes light up when they saw him, and his own ever-changing eyes were warm with compassion. And then he was off, running around and tending for the injured and receiving the hugs from the children with dirty faces. Crimson Clovers came over and hugged him tightly, and didn’t let him go for a few minutes. Frank let go of Hearts and sat down, the pain of his leg starting to be a little too much. If they needed to travel, then it would be hell for him, but in the end it would help him get used to the pain, if having it as a permanent side effect was a possibility. Rebels were full of badly healed injuries that resulted in chronic pain.

But he would learn how to work with it, that wasn’t such a big problem, at least for him. Frank looked up and saw that the sky was turning dark. Which meant the heat was about to leave the sand and the cold air was going to start creeping on them. He wrapped his arms around himself and rubbed the fabric of his old clothes. They were dusty and dirty, they had endured sweat and blood and being torn and sewn together a thousand times, but they felt familiar and it made him feel like himself.

Dark Spades who was back to being the mom of hundreds of addicts and orphans, and would do anything for them, went back inside the base with only a bandanna covering his nose and mouth to recover all the things they would need to spend the night in the open. Crimson Clovers spent like half an hour trying to convince his brother of how dangerous it was, how they weren’t sure if the gas was completely gone or if there were toxic residues that could kill him. He did it anyway. He got blankets, supplies and (even if Frank was strongly against it) some doses so the abstinence didn’t kill anyone. Things were already getting a little crazy, when recovering addicts were also homeless and scared. Dark Spades could only do so much about it.

Hearts went to sleep with Clovers, leaving Frank all alone with his blanket and his thoughts. It was cold but nothing so bitter he couldn’t take. After a while of being wide awake but feeling incredibly tired, Frank decided to start trying to fall asleep. But nothing quite worked, his mind was racing and in the back of it he knew it was going to be another sleepless night. Dark Spades came over and sat beside him, looking at him with bright electric blue eyes. It made him look sad, nostalgic.

“Can I ask you something?” Frank questioned. Dark Spades was standing guard over his babies so he wasn’t going to be sleeping either.

“Yeah, anything.” He said, but he didn’t look at him.

“Why are you crying?”

He didn’t seem to notice the tears rolling down his face. He raised his hand to wipe them from his cheeks and sighed.

“I couldn’t get everyone out on time.” He said, and sobbed quietly. “People died. And I guess I can’t help but feel a little guilty about it.”

“You know this wasn’t your fault, right? No one could be prepared for such thing.”

“Yeah, I know. I think I have been crying for a while now, but I haven’t noticed. Maybe it’s because, subconsciously, I believe those people who died deserve that somebody cries for them. Most of the guys and girls here don’t have any family left or… anyone who cares if they die or not. Only me.”

“Spades.” He called him. “Why are you like this?”

“That’s kind of a long story.” He answered with a sad smile. “But you mean like, why am I so selfless? Why do I help this people even though it hurts me sometimes? Why do I keep doing this if all I get is… trouble? And yeah, it’s true. I bet you’re wondering why it is hard for me to… see my value.”

“Do you read minds?” it wouldn’t surprise him if he did.

He chuckled.

“No, I’m just really good at reading people. And while some are an open book, I really had to put an effort in unraveling you.” He said, and sighed deeply. “Well, it was a very long time ago. I was desperate for a change, and as I see it, I was blessed with a gift. You can say I know how to get my way with people, lead them into believing what I want them to believe.”

“That sounds like some kind of super power that could be used by a bad guy to do very bad things.” Frank said, and he kind of enjoyed having that conversation with him.

“Trust me, it is. But I didn’t ask for it to use it to become an evil mastermind. I just wanted… the world to change, you know? It sounds childish, but I was very young at that time. I didn’t fully understand what I could do, but to put it in simple words, I am a canal. I feel the other’s pain as if it was my own, so I seek to take it away.”

“Wait, so all of those people’s problems…”

“They become my own problems, yes.”

“That sounds horrible.” He didn’t mean to say that, but that was what he thought about the whole situation. Feeling the pain from another person, that might as well be a complete stranger? With so many people under his wing his world must be hell. No wonder he broke down after the attack, he felt the panic of everyone present. He felt them dying…

“I know it does.” He said, giving him a small smile. “But I also feel other’s happiness, gratitude, relief, love. It’s not horrible all the time. People channel their fears and insecurities into me, yes, but in the end they are at peace, and therefore I am at peace as well. It helps me understand them when no one else can, since I am in their shoes. So I help them out as much as I can, and I guess that has turned me into the responsible adult that guides them when they’re lost. It does come with a price, that is it hard for me to see my own value, because I am always placing everyone before me. That can become a dangerous thing, so my brother is always fighting me about it. I also do not expect people to be nice to me in return, that got kind of erased from my brain. And... I guess I never had anyone tell me something like 'Im proud of you' or 'you matter', so my self-steem is kind of on a negative scale. The gift can become a burden, since you start living for others instead of for yourself. But I guess is up to me to not let it consume me.”

“What about your galaxy eyes? Is that part of being a canal?”

“Yeah, it kind of came with the package. It is like being an open book. If I feel something, you can see it in my eyes. Literally. Sometimes is really inconvenient. I can’t really lie, or keep secrets. I’ve learned to keep them one color so I can talk to clients or strangers, but this is how they really are. Then again, people have told me they could get lost in my eyes and they really can.”

Now Frank felt like he had to tell Dark Spades something really personal about himself. Because the guy had just spilled everything about his gift and what is his purpose on this earth so Frank felt compelled to do so too. Except he didn’t have a gift, and he didn’t exactly know his purpose on earth. Even though Dark Spades was just a couple years older than him, he seemed mature and wise. His eyes made him look like he was centuries old.

“I’m a bit lost myself, you know?” Frank murmured.

“Yeah, I can tell.” He said, and his eyes sparkled with laughter. “I see you miss someone. So much it hurts. Is it Party?”

“Party Poison…” Frank sighed. “I really miss that guy.”

“Because… you love him?”

Frank felt his cheeks grow red and was thankful it was dark. He didn’t know if Dark Spades had night vision with those eyes. But it begged the question, did he love Gerard? And the answer was yes. That didn’t mean he got to keep him by his side and live happily ever after. He didn’t _know_ if Gerard loved him back the way he did. Sure, he had told him so but it was the night before battle, he could have said it just because it was the end of the world. It was Frank who had been crushing on him for years. He didn’t know if Gerard had thought about him that way in the past.

“I guess I do…” Frank admitted. “But, how do you date someone with a mental illness?”

“Oh.” Dark Spades muttered, arching his eyebrows in surprise. “You love the shit out of them. Whatever Party is going through right now, he needs you. He needs you to help him through it because… well, is something he cannot control. He must feel helpless, and alone. That’s when you need to make him see he’s not. It’s just a matter of listening and supporting, that way he can find his own strength by taking yours.”

Frank sighed. To be there for Gerard he first needed to know where he was.

“Don’t worry.” Dark Spades told him. “We’ll find him.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tyler really wanted to be found. Anything that Josh was doing to get him out of that prison, he needed to do it faster. Because being trapped with the demon that had tormented him for years was not fun. His only comfort was whenever Josh would talk to him through the Ouija board, and he got to hear his voice. Of course their conversations didn’t last long without Blurryface interrupting. Instead of feeling down like he used to do, Tyler started to feel angry. It annoyed him to hear Blurryface’s grotesque voice chanting things he didn’t want to listen. All that frustration had built up and it couldn’t be long until he exploded.

There was no way to keep track of time in the cell, so he didn’t know how much time they had been trapped together. It felt like an eternity. While Tyler tried to keep his mind busy walking around in circles, Blurryface just couldn’t be bothered. Being trapped didn’t seem to affect him in any way, so he just sat down with his legs crossed and stared at Tyler most of the time. He would talk to himself out loud too, and it was driving Tyler insane.

To keep himself from madness, Tyler started composing. Just melodies at first, rhythms that he would tap and hum over and over again. He started getting creative with the few sounds he could make with his surroundings. He created these melodies with the sounds of his palms against the padded walls, the floor, his thighs and his chest. After a while he started noticing that it bothered Blurryface, it pissed him off to hear his melodies and they seemed to take his peace away from him. Once Tyler started playing, he was no longer calm, instead he looked uncomfortable.

So of course Tyler kept doing it every day. Then he started mumbling words, sentences he said under his breath until those sentences became verses and those verses became songs. And the words came to him with ease, so much he could just compose as many songs as he pleased, and they would permanently record in his brain. Tyler didn’t know he could do that before, or if it was just some magical property of being trapped. Either way, making… music, if he could call it that, was giving him a sense of… relief. All the feelings he had inside and had repressed for so long were pouring into the verses he mumbled, and that’s how Tyler discovered that for him, music was cathartic.

It was purpose. It was what he craved and needed for so long. And he had found it, while being trapped in another dimension with no company other than his demon. His demon, who was starting to lose control over him. Tyler no longer felt filthy and impure, he felt no longer powerless. He felt – no, he _was_ free. He wasn’t going to live his life under the yoke of a red-eyed demon that had cut his wings back when he was younger, leaving him flightless, incapable of escape.

Well that was over. Tyler was in control now.

A little eternity later, he was confident enough to stop whispering the lyrics to himself and instead unleash his voice and really sing. It had been scary at first, listening to his voice with nothing in the background, just the words he pronounced, raw and honest piercing through the silence. But it was also… beautiful. There was something about his voice, he felt like it was a flexible instrument that he could manipulate and get the sounds he wanted. He discovered he could reach some high notes, and it turned out he could literally break his voice into a scream that was weirdly pleasant.

Blurryface flinched every time Tyler opened his mouth. It was almost as if he was hurt by Tyler’s music. This was only an incentive for him to keep singing out loud. He tried to stop him from composing as hard as he could, but for Tyler it was only slightly amusing.

“ _I know, where you stand._ ” Tyler repeated to himself, focusing on finding the next words.

“I’m sitting, actually.” Blurryface said, from the other side of the room. His plans to stop him consisted basically in making sassy comments while Tyler was trying to concentrate.

“ _Silent, in the trees._ ” He continued, ignoring him.

“Trees? How do you know what those are? Have you ever even seen a tree?”

~

“ _I have killed a man_ ”

“No you haven’t, Tyler. I, on the other side, have indeed killed a man.”

~

“We all know you’re qualified to fix a chair…”

“What does that even mean!?”

~

“…giving birth and stuff…”

“What da hell, Tyler.”

~

“ _I scream, you scream, we all scream…_ ”

“For ice cream!”

“ _…‘Cause we’re terrified… of what’s around the corner._ ”

“Oh.”

~

“ _I put socks on my feet_ ”

“Yeah no shit, Tyler.”

“ _Just so that my soul won’t fall through my toes_ ”

“What.”

~

“Oh and now you’re screaming, okay, you need to be stopped.”

Blurryface had tried to _physically_ stop Tyler, only to discover that Tyler was now stronger than him. He learned that the hard way, and that gave Tyler even more power over him. He didn’t like being in that situation, the only comfort he had was the fact that he was still linked to Tyler. The connection was weaker, only a thread was left, but it was there.

Which meant that if Tyler got out of the padded cell, he was getting out as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Listen, you can’t bring him back.”

Josh was usually a very laid-back, calm person. Or at least he needed to be whenever Tyler was having a particularly hard time. But now Josh was pissed. He had his strong arms crossed tightly over his chest, his head was slightly tilted down so he could look up to the person in front of him with a glare of pure annoyance. Add to that the fact that he hadn’t been sleeping enough lately and the dark shadows under his eyes were starting to turn a deep purple. He was physically and emotionally exhausted.

He had managed to doze off for a couple hours, not in the best position. In his defense, he spent the day in that same position, and sleep had just come and finally took over him. That certain position, hunched over Tyler’s bedside, couldn’t be good for his back. And now he was sore, pissed and tired. Josh had woken up only to be received with yet another problem. Josh was done with the problems. It was slowly building inside of him and driving him into a state of discomfort he was not very happy about. He was anxious, all the time. He wanted to scratch himself out of his skin.

More importantly, he wanted Tyler. He didn’t think _anyone_ really understood what he was going through. People dressed in black would constantly come into the room to give him meals, and Josh bet they all thought Tyler and him were some kind of tragic lovers, since Josh didn’t really move from his ‘waiting for Tyler to magically wake up’ position and just stared at his boyfriend, just yearning for those eyes to open so he could see the chocolate irises he loved so much. He wanted his face to stop being all pale and expressionless, and instead light up with a smile.

And now, as if the universe didn’t think he had enough on his plate, he woke up all grumpy only to find a guy in sparky clothes telling him that.

_“Listen, you can’t bring him back.”_

Josh didn’t say anything for a while, just glared at him. That’s when the guy realized he had made a huge mistake by saying those words in that particular order, so he opened his mouth to try and redeem himself, but Josh interrupted him with a harsh voice.

“No, you listen.” He growled, and saw how the guy’s expression dropped into one of defeat. “You don’t get to tell me what I can or cannot do. Especially when Tyler is involved. You, whoever you are, need to understand that I am going to do _anything_ to get him back. I have a whole organization working on this, and you? You’re just another dusty rebel. You’re no one.”

“I know you’re hurting but…”

“I’m sorry but has your lover been in a coma for months?”

“My lover has been dead for months.” Bachelor murmured, and Josh knew he had gone too far. What was he thinking? He was better than that. “Yours at least is still alive. But you need to listen to me.”

Josh wasn’t mean. He wasn’t the kind of guy to make fun of other people’s tragedies. Especially the ones involving death. He wanted to say he was sorry, but he stayed quiet. “Remember the woman with white hair that we saw in battle?” He started explaining. “And she had all this powers and was kind of similar to Blurryface? Okay, I know we really don’t know much about exactly who or… what Blurryface is, but this woman is different just like him. And she came up to me and said some weird metaphors that basically meant I needed to put my feelings aside and then she said. ‘Don’t let the red-eyed demon out of his cage’. And that is really specific.”

Red-eyed demon. Blurryface’s blood red eyes and gross smile suddenly flashed in his mind and he had to blink the image away. The guy noticed he was startled now, and took an expression of pity.

“I think he was placed in there for a reason.” He said softly, walking closer to him and raising his arm as if he was going to place it on Josh’s shoulder to comfort him. “And Tyler was just collateral damage…”

Something inside him shattered. He clenched his fist and punched the guy right in the jaw. He felt bone colliding against his knuckles and pain flaring up his wrist, but he didn’t care. The guy stumbled backwards and held his jaw, his eyes clenched shut with a painful expression.

“Never call Tyler that.” Josh thundered, feeling a sudden burn in his veins.

“ _Josh…_ ”

He froze. That voice…

He turned around to see that Tyler, even though he was still unconscious and barely breathing, had his arm outstretched with his hand open towards him. And he wasn’t like that before. Josh, still completely stunned, walked towards him, and took his hand. He felt a lighting of energy go up his arm that made him fall to his knees. His veins started showing over his skin and it felt like his arm was going to be torn apart from his body, but Josh just squeezed his shoulder with his other hand to try and relieve the tension, and didn’t let go.

The door flew open. Josh only heard it but didn’t turn around to see who had barged in. But by the sound of heels against the tiles, he knew it was Ashlynne. He assumed she stared at the guy who had a growing bruise on his jaw and then her eyes darted towards the scene happening between Tyler and Josh. Josh could feel how a dark cobweb crawled underneath his skin, all the way up his arm and slowly growing near his heart…

He screamed out in pain when he felt like his heart was being pierced by little needles, that knocked the air out of him and started sucking the energy out of him, bit by bit, making his head feel like it was about to explode and the world started swirling around. His vision went out of focus when tears started filling his eyes and rolling down his cheeks, as he was in an agonizing pain that had him screaming on his knees and wishing he would pass out or just…die.

He had expected many things from Ashlynne in that moment. But what she actually did was a complete surprise and didn’t comfort him at all.

“It’s working…” she whispered, and Josh could notice something different in her voice… delight?

Josh couldn’t take it anymore. He let his head fall back and his eyes went completely white, a few choked whimpers leaving his mouth before falling backwards and hitting his head pretty hard against the tiles.

Bachelor and Ashlynne both stood there, seeing the boy with pink hair on the floor, completely immobile and with a puddle of blood under his head, which kept getting bigger as the crimson liquid flowed out of his half-opened mouth.

Bachelor’s eyes were placed on Josh, but Ashlynne’s gaze was now focused on Tyler, who had just opened his eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The truck had stopped in the diner and Pete still didn’t let Andy or Joe get close to Patrick. If Patrick hadn’t been drowsy and confused, he would have protested a lot. But in that moment he was completely out of it, letting himself be carried by Pete wherever he wanted to go. Pete wanted him to eat a little before going to bed, but looking at his friend’s peaceful features as he slept made him decide against it. He laid him down on the mattress and covered him with as many blankets as he could find, since Patrick’s skin was cold as ice.

He hummed and curled up, making himself smaller. Andy and Joe were standing a few feet away from them, afraid Pete would punch them or something now that Patrick wasn’t watching. Instead he decided to completely ignore them, until Joe went up to him and said:

“You can’t keep avoiding us forever. He is still our brother too.”

“Well you should’ve thought about that before giving up on him.” Pete said with a really calm and steady voice. That was so unlike him it made Joe and Andy even more afraid.

“We were moving on…” Joe started to argue.

“Without even trying.” Pete whispered, since Patrick had started stirring around as if he was bothered by the noise of their argument.

“You don’t get to treat him like a child that you have custody of.” Andy murmured, crossing his arms over his chest. “He’s an adult, he can make his own decisions.”

“Have you seen him?” Pete asked with his voice full of disbelief. “Have you seen how skinny he is right now? He’s weak and probably can’t stand on his own. You don’t know what the hell happened out there. You see this?”

He showed them his palms, full of cuts and bruises.

“I literally had to dig him out of the remains of the building. And I didn’t even know if he was there. I spent hours moving blocks with only the hope of finding him. I was the one who spent what felt like hours trying to resuscitate him because he wasn’t breathing. If I hadn’t bothered to go on that mission that you called meaningless and suicidal, he would be dead for real. And it would be your fault.”

None of them said anything for a while, until Joe walked out of the room and into the kitchen, shortly followed by Andy. Pete then proceeded to get into the mattress and under the blankets so he could finally rest. He was staring at the ceiling, a million thoughts going through his mind when suddenly he felt Patrick moving closer to him. He wrapped his arm around Pete’s chest and tangled their legs together, hiding his face in the crook of his neck. Pete held his breath, afraid even the slightest movement would bother Patrick. After a moment he wrapped his arms around the guy as well, feeling his hot breath in the skin of his neck.

Pete buried his face in Patrick’s blond hair, which smelled like metal and dust. He let himself relax into him, convincing himself that he was actually there, that he had really saved him. He thought back at the moment he had kissed him, just out of euphoria. It was a really short kiss and Patrick was still dizzy, but Pete wondered if in a world where the circumstances were different, Patrick would have kissed him back.

Probably not, because Patrick was straight.

Then again, he had never had a problem with them kissing him on the cheeks, or giving each other forehead kisses. It was just a thing they did, because sometimes hugs weren’t enough to show how much someone mattered, even if it wasn’t romantic. Apparently Patrick had no problem with cuddling with Pete in the middle of the night. But he didn’t know if he was doing it on purpose or just trying to get more warmth. Either way, it felt really good.

The next couple days, Pete spent them nursing Patrick back to health. He would never leave his side, always ready to give him anything he needed or wanted. Pete was so happy to have Patrick with him again he didn’t realize exactly how much damage had been done to him. How broken he really was. It all started with little things. The shifty eyes, the slight tremble of his hand, him flinching every time someone made a sudden move close to him.

Then he started having nightmares. At first it was just him shifting around in his sleep and mumbling, but then they started getting more serious to the point where he screamed and struggled almost every night.

Like someone was hurting him.

Because of the nightmares he wasn’t getting any sleep, and that didn’t help him get better. Pete was worried sick, especially because Patrick acted like none of that was happening, like he was fine, when clearly there was something keeping him from sleeping. And Pete wanted to know what his nightmares were about, so maybe he could help him.

“Patrick, please.” He pleaded. He was desperate. “Talk to me. You’re not fine.”

He didn’t say anything. His blue-green eyes were filled with pain when he looked away from him, holding his stump with his hand. Maybe that was it. Pete hadn’t really considered the fact that Patrick had been locked up for months and that his hand had been chopped off. No wonder the poor guy was having nightmares every night. Who knew the horrible things they did to him while he was in that base.

“They hurt you, didn’t they?” Pete whispered, and Patrick’s breathing hitched. He closed the space between them and embraced him into a tight, comforting hug. He kissed his temple and brushed the hair out of his face. “You’re okay, Patrick. They can’t hurt you. I’ll protect you.”

Pete had an uneasy feeling about that. Patrick had always been the one to face danger every time it came around the corner, he was the one to console them whenever they got upset for any reason. Now _he_ was the one in need of a hug, the one that needed to be comforted at night, the one who needed a shoulder to cry on. And Pete would be glad to be that shoulder.

Patrick looked up at him with his beautiful ocean eyes, and Pete held his gaze for a couple moments. There was something about that look that made Pete’s insides twirl and his heart skip a beat. A little chill down his spine, a sensation he hadn’t felt in a very long time.

That’s when Pete realized how easy it would be to fall in love with Patrick.

He didn’t have a crush on Patrick, not quite. But he could. Patrick was really sweet and caring, he was beautiful and attractive. Pete didn’t look at him that way, but he realized _he could_. The love wasn’t there yet, but he could totally see himself with Patrick if he tried. But there was still something stopping him from doing just that.

First, Patrick was straight. He wouldn’t be attracted to Pete, not because he thought Pete was unattractive, but because he just wasn’t into guys. So dating Patrick would just be a daydream that couldn’t come true. And he figured that having a crush on someone that you had zero chance with wasn’t healthy.

And second, even if Patrick could somehow like him back, he didn’t think he was prepared to let himself love someone again. It seemed so long ago, but his heart still clenched when he thought about Mikey. It still hurt. Pete hadn’t had the chance to mourn properly, so his wound was still open. And he wouldn’t want Patrick to be the stitches. He hadn’t lost anyone so important to him before, so he didn’t know how to handle the pain and grief he felt. He hadn’t had time to talk to Patrick about it either, and he didn’t want to bother him with something that had happened so long ago.

Sometimes he seemed to forget that Mikey was dead. His brain would come up with something like ‘ _I really miss Mikey, I should go visit him_ ’ and then let Pete fall into the horrible realization that it wasn’t possible. That he wasn’t there anymore. Love was a privilege, but it was also dangerous.

“ _If something happens to me_ ” Mikey had said. “ _Don’t get stuck, let yourself heal_ ”

He had also told him to let himself love again, the last time they were together. Pete had refused to agree with him, but deep down he knew that Mikey wanted him to move on and be happy.

What if Patrick could make him happy?

Still, it wasn’t going to happen. It would be silly of Pete to suddenly develop a crush on Patrick.

But he kept having this… urges. He wanted to have him between his arms, he wanted to feel his soft skin under his fingertips. Sometimes Patrick would intertwine their fingers and squeeze whenever he was afraid, and Pete would feel a sudden chill and linger a little, holding his hand. He would run his hand through Patrick’s blond hair, and Patrick let him since it lulled him to sleep. Pete would keep doing it long after he had fallen asleep. Sometimes Patrick would start frowning and whining when he was having a nightmare, so Pete started peppering him with soft kisses that he placed in his forehead, his cheeks, the tip of his nose, and his eyelids. Eventually Pete would give him a soft peck on the lips. Patrick never seemed uncomfortable, if anything he pressed himself closer to him.

Suddenly and out of nowhere, Pete’s stomach would fill with butterflies every time Patrick smiled at him. His heart would start going faster every time Patrick touched him. He would feel himself blush every time Patrick came ridiculously close to his face while they were sleeping, to the point where he could feel his breath and would only have to lean forward a little bit… to softly press his lips against his…

He really tried to stop himself from getting flustered like that around Patrick, but the truth was that he was hopelessly falling in love with his best friend, slowly at first and then all at once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas! and now onto New Year  
> I'm very happy with how this is turning out and your comments and kudos brighten my day so thank you ;)


	5. Love Is Always Scary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After being trapped for a while, Tyler finally wakes up, only to find he's not quite the same. Still, his priority is to protect Josh over anyone. Even if that means doing things he's not okay with.
> 
> Pete has come to accept the fact that now he seems to love his leader. Or at least that's what he feels. He soon realizes just how much Patrick means to him, and how much he means to Patrick. 
> 
> The match is not over yet, but one player has some clear advantage over the other

_Brendon wanted to run towards Josh to see what had happened to him, he had expected Ashlynne to do something about it. But she didn’t. She walked past his twitching figure towards the bed, purposely stepping over the blood on the floor._

_“Gentlemen.” She spoke, her voice unaltered, as if there wasn’t a man bleeding on the floor. “Please take care of the rebel over here.”_

Some soldiers, similar to the ones Brendon had seen before, came into the room and started moving towards Josh. Now Brendon was shocked, his world had lurched all of a sudden. But Josh was a rebel, and rebels take care of each other. Even if he had punched him in the jaw, Brendon wasn’t going to leave Josh to his fate. When he tried to get the soldiers away from his body, Ashlynne turned around to give him a look of pure hatred and annoyance.

“Take care of him too.”

With those simple words, the soldiers under her command knocked Bachelor out and dragged the two unconscious rebels out of the room. She didn’t like when things didn’t go her way because of someone being too emotional. Tyler was oblivious to what had just happened, he just seemed really confused. Like he had just woken up from a very long nap and had no idea what time it was. He propped himself up into a half-sitting position and looked around a bit, his brown eyes landing on Ashlynne. She smiled.

“Hello, Tyler, glad to have you back.” She said, planning out her words carefully as Tyler looked at her, his head tilted in confusion.

“Where am I?” He asked, his arms tensing up. “Where is Josh?”

The second question. He’s been awake for less than a minute. Ashlynne noticed him trying to read her, but her poker face was too good and could fool anyone. She knew that. 

“I will explain everything to you, all in its due time.” She said, avoiding the questions and walking up to him. “But there’s something of extreme importance I must ask you first. Where’s him?”

Him. Tyler knew what she was talking about, how could he not? But Tyler didn’t answer. He stared straight ahead and didn’t say anything. Ashlynne waited for a couple moments, but nothing happened. Tyler just looked at his hands, now clean, free of the blackness they once had. He looked astonished, and after a while he closed his eyes and sighed. 

“He’s still here.” He said, raising his hand towards his chest. 

Ashlynne smiled. 

“But it is different now, isn’t it?” she pressed, trying to get the answer she wanted so desperately. “He isn’t in control. You are.”

Tyler went back to staring at his hands, and for a moment Ashlynne thought it had been useless. That she had spent so much effort and hours trying to get this boy out of the padded cell, only to have Blurry disappear. Maybe she wasn’t fast enough. Maybe Tyler had gone completely insane from being isolated for so long that now he wasn’t in his right mind. She was about to curse at her bad luck, when she noticed something happening in Tyler’s hands.

The blackness was slowly coming back, but it was different now. It swirled only around his fingertips and in the center of his palm, as if Tyler was holding a little ball of dark smoke under his skin. Ashlynne’s smile only widened, because she was wrong. She had achieved what she wanted and now Blurryface was on a leash. Tyler’s leash. And if she could get Tyler on a leash…

She was going to win.

“You’re probably really bemused.” She said, smiling kindly at him. “You should get some rest, it will all be clear in the morning.” Tyler nodded slowly, still looking dumbfounded. That gave Ashlynne enough confidence to leave the room. Once she closed the door, the lights turned off and left the whole room in a peaceful darkness. __

Tyler wasn’t bemused. On the contrary, he felt like his senses were sharper now and his muscles were stronger. He was fully awake, aware of his surroundings and how shady the whole situation seemed. He had been trapped on a padded cell for what felt like months, so of course he didn’t want to lie down. But the woman who had talked to him was right about something. He _was_ different.

Instead of being the one chained, he now was the one holding the chains. In his brain there was no trace of panic. Just pure and cold determination. He could do anything he wanted. He felt powerful. He waited a bit until he was sure the woman was gone, and then jumped out of bed. The floor seemed to shift below him, making him lose balance for a bit. His legs felt a little wobbly, but he managed to make it to the door.

He opened it just a bit to take a peek at the corridor. There was no one in sight, so he stepped out and closed the door behind him very quietly. He was barefooted for some reason, so he felt something wet when he stepped on it. He looked down only to see a trail of crimson liquid going down the path of immaculate tiles. Tyler felt something inside him tug towards the end of the hallway, so he moved slowly and silently.

He didn’t make a single sound. Only the constant buzz of the engines in that place was breaking the silence. Tyler went by many rooms, but didn’t get anyone’s attention. To the other people in that place, he was like a ghost, just a scary looking shadow slowly making its way down the hallway. The blood trail ended in front of a door made out of shiny steel. There was no doorknob, nor any way to look inside of the room.

Tyler simply placed his palm against the cold metal, and it started to melt. After a couple seconds, there was a hole with blackened edges, the size of a small person. Tyler, not at all shocked by what he had just done, stepped inside without hesitation. And then all his defenses dropped to the ground making a loud clattering sound.

_Josh._

He was pushed up against the wall, his clothing all soaked in blood that seemed to come out of his mouth. His head was resting in his chest and his arms were inert, hanging from his shoulders as if he was a rag doll that just got thrown on a corner. The tips of his eyelashes were pure white, like he had little snowflakes resting on them. He looked pale and sick, but Tyler noticed he was still breathing. 

He approached him quietly and knelt down in front of him, placing his hands on his cheeks and bringing his face up. Josh didn’t open his eyes, Tyler didn’t even see them moving behind his eyelids. 

“Josh…” he murmured, shaking him lightly. “Josh wake up…”

“ _Stop touching him, you dumbass._ ” Tyler gasped when he heard that voice very clearly in his head. He could picture a little Blurryface sitting inside his brain, by his ear, seeing everything through his eyes as if he was watching a movie. “ _You’re making it worst._ ”

For some reason, Blurryface seemed to be acting differently. He was… calm. He hadn’t done anything to hurt Tyler, and up to that moment he hadn’t said a word. And now he was giving him advice? Since when did he care so much about Josh? Tyler was pretty sure he hated Josh. But his lover was not moving and he had just woken up, the wisest thing to do was listen. He snatched his hands away and then saw what Blurryface was talking about. The blackness hadn’t gone away, it was present there like oily paint, but it was different from before. Back when his hands were completely covered by the black, it hurt him, made his hands feel useless and heavy. Now it was concentrated in certain areas in his palms, like he had control over it. It didn’t feel useless and heavy anymore. It felt powerful.

Tyler realized his hands were not meant to heal, they were meant to destroy.

Just like the door, his hands were damaging Josh even further, and touching him was not a good idea. But then, how was he supposed to help him? He didn’t know how to treat him or what had happened to him. He barely knew why he was awake or why he was on that ship.

If he couldn’t help Josh, he would find someone who could. Fortunately, the woman from earlier had noticed that he was out of the room, and was now on her way there. Tyler could feel her coming closer to him. There was something off about that woman, but if she could help Josh, Tyler wouldn’t question her. She stood at the doorframe, staring at him with her head tilted to the side. She almost seemed to be mocking him.

“Please.” Tyler said, and that simple word was all he needed. It didn’t come out like an appeal, it sounded more like a keyword, something forced. Like he didn’t want to be saying it. And he didn’t, but he knew that his only chance of helping Josh was being amenable with her. Make her feel like he wasn’t challenging her authority. 

“You see, I spent the last months trying to track exactly where that padded cell was.” She started talking. “I practically had to scramble through your brain in order to find it. And let me tell you, boy you got a messy mind.”

As if he didn’t know that already.

“It’s very overwhelming, there’s too much stuff in there and it’s like it all hits you in the face at once and… very confusing. Very unsettling too. But when I finally reached out to that tiny padded cell you were on, I realized I needed a copious amount of energy to get you out. Vital energy to build a bridge so your conscience could come back to your body. But I started thinking exactly how was I going to make that happen. And then I discovered that I had the perfect source of energy. I just had to poke around your brain a little and make you call out to him, and the rest is done by itself.”

Of course Josh wouldn’t hesitate to take his hand and let him come back, even if it almost killed him. Tyler frowned and glared at the woman for taking advantage of Josh like that.

“Now you ask me to fix him.” She continued. “But there’s nothing to be fixed. Your boyfriend is not broken, he is just complete deployed of his vital energy. There’s only so much I can do about it.”

“Then do it.” he spat, and the woman arched an eyebrow at him. Tyler realized it had come out like a demand, and this lady didn’t appreciate being bossed around. So he lowered his head and whispered: “Please.”

She smiled. That meant she had won.

“Very well. The only solution I see suitable is to just give him a little shot of adrenaline.” She thought to herself, as if she was a doctor doing a prescription for a patient. “That might shake things up just the way we want to.”

~

Tyler had somehow convinced the woman (whose name was Ashlynne) to give him and Josh a little privacy by allowing them to be on their own in a room. They hadn’t seen each other for months and Josh specially had suffered through them, so Ashlynne figured it was fine.

Tyler had waited patiently, and instead of growing anxious, he grew calmer by the second. His body became looser and more relaxed as Josh started showing more signs of being alive. Ever since Tyler had woken up (about two hours ago) he noticed that his body wasn’t the same as always. He didn’t slouch at all while walking, and his body didn’t have that slight swing while doing it. It was completely stiff most of the time. He was also aware of his own breathing, blinking and even his tongue sitting in his mouth. It was like he had been an entity for so long he forgot how it felt to have a _real_ body. But as Josh started to wake up, his stiffness seemed to calm down a bit, and he was now able to feel the heat in his chest and just the… excitement of finally seeing Josh after so long. At first he was confused. He had blinked a couple times and looked around for a bit, until his big, warm brown eyes landed on him and his features seemed to light up with joy as he whispered:

“Tyler…?”

Tyler smiled, it feeling a little weird on his cheeks. 

“Hey.” He murmured, because he didn’t know what else to say. Josh got up from the bed he was lying on and ran towards him like a baby deer, his legs not quite supporting him. He grabbed onto Tyler like he was the only solid thing in the room and buried his face in his chest, breathing him in as Tyler wrapped his arms around him as well and rested his chin on top of his head. It was a privilege of being a couple inches taller than him.

They squeezed each other for a long time, not wanting to let go, making up for all the time they had lost. Tyler moved his hand to run his fingers through Josh’s pink fluffy hair, and placed a kiss on his temple, closing his eyes and taking in the _feeling_ of having Josh between his arms. He had felt so empty upon awakening but having Josh there, hugging him tightly, his skin, his scent so close to him, all of the small things about him started feeling up that hole in his chest, there was nothing missing from him anymore. 

It was Tyler the one who pulled back just enough to place a kiss on Josh’s lips, and he felt his hands come up to cup his cheeks and pull him closer, kissing him back eagerly. With that kiss Josh said how much he had missed Tyler, how much he had suffered over the past few months of hunching besides his bed, how much his own thoughts had tortured him, made him lose hope for a while, how many hours he had spent awake on his bedside, praying for Tyler to come back to him. 

That’s when Tyler realized how much Josh really loved him. He felt Josh’s pure adoration in his gestures, in his touch, in his kiss. He hadn’t felt that before, it was like every emotion filling the room was now enhanced and he could feel it in a much sincere, deep way.

Josh pulled away to gather his breath, and Tyler just stared at him. The air had not left his lungs, he could keep kissing Josh for hours and never run out of breath. He still didn’t know why he knew he could do that, but it had to be related with all the changes he was going through. Of course, he didn’t say anything to Josh, he didn’t want to ruin the moment with his doubt. 

“I love you.” Josh whispered, like it was their little secret. Tyler suddenly felt like he was back in Battery City, much younger, with Josh, and he was whispering those three words into his ear. No one could know, it had to be their little secret. 

Tyler felt human again. Not some entity sharing a body with Blurryface and having his powers.

“I love you too.” And as those words rolled off his tongue, the world was stable again, it was no longer a swirling mess with too many things that hit you in the face all at once, like Ashlynne had described his mind. He was at peace, he could smile, and it calmed his overactive mind. 

That’s what love did to Tyler Joseph. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ashlynne did not like what love did to Tyler Joseph. 

Ever since the boy had woken up, she was keeping a very close eye on him. His vitals, the energy he seemed to be producing like a dark aura around him. Ashlynne was amazed, astonished at how _powerful_ Tyler was. With a little bit of work, the boy could make the world bow to him. That was the kind of destructive power she needed. But while sitting in her office, looking at the sky with a cup of tea in her hands, the numbers went down heavily. Tyler’s dark aura went out like a flame without oxygen. 

Ashlynne rushed to see what the hell was going on, only to watch Tyler and Josh making out like they hadn’t seen each other in months. Which was basically true. She reflected upon it and realized that Josh Dun wasn’t so harmless anymore. He _weakened_ Tyler, up to the point where he was _normal_. Why? Because he loved him. Love had become an obstacle, a restrain keeping him from reaching his full potential. 

Ashlynne looked away from the screens for one second, and the next they were both gone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I need you to trust me.” Tyler had said just a while ago. “Ashlynne, there’s something about her that doesn’t add up. I can… _feel_ she knows more than she shows. She’s hiding something. All this, it seems unreliable… I know it sounds crazy, Josh, but I need you to believe me.” 

“I do believe you.” He had answered. Tyler had taken his hand (the blackness didn’t seem to be hurting him) and guided him around looking for an exit. Some walls had paintings and patterns drawn all over them, making it odd to run really fast through the halls. “Tyler… what are you trying to do?” 

“Get out.” Josh noticed how hard Tyler was trying to go unseen by all the guards, as if they were going to restrain them. Josh had gotten used to walking past them, neither of them acknowledging their presence. 

“There are cameras everywhere, Ty, I don’t think…”

“They can’t see us.” Tyler said, and he sounded very sure of himself. Tyler knew Josh and him were invisible to the cameras, he somehow knew that the lens couldn’t capture his image, and couldn’t capture Josh’s if he was holding his hand. Even though most ghosts did appear on cameras, Tyler felt like he was made out of smoke, the cameras saw through him. The guards, on the other hand, could see them running around, so they needed to be careful. 

Finally, they stumbled upon a small gate with a switch on it. The angry red on the handle couldn’t mean something good. There was a small window that showed the sky outside the ship, and the glass seemed to be inches thick. Without much hesitation, Tyler pulled the handle and the door came off, the air hitting his face wildly. He set the door aside and leaned forward to see that they were, indeed, very high up. What he didn’t notice was that Josh had fallen to his knees and was pressing his temples with his palms. 

“Josh? Josh what’s wrong?” he asked, suddenly concerned for his lover. 

“Don’t you feel that?” he wheezed, like he was having trouble breathing properly. 

“No, Josh. He doesn’t.” Ashlynne’s voice said through the speakers. How did she find them? Tyler was absolutely sure she couldn’t see them through the cameras. If she could, she wouldn’t have waited so long to do something about them running around. She didn’t like things not being under her control, and Tyler and Josh were breaking a few of her rules. Had a guard seen them by any chance? “Now listen to me. I know you feel like you can jump out of this ship and survive, Tyler Joseph”

It was true. Tyler had been gazing at the sky, looking down at the ground and thinking he could make it. He felt like his legs would hold him fine if he jumped and landed down there on the sand. He wasn’t saying it wouldn’t hurt, but he wouldn’t die.

“I know you feel like nothing can kill you.” She continued. “And even if that might be true, I know someone that can surely be killed.”

Josh.

“Now you wouldn’t want that, would you? And let me tell you that I can and I will persecute you. Because you are a valuable piece whatsoever. You may not feel it, but the pressure in the room you are in is dropping, and little Josh over there is suffocating. Make your decision, I’m giving you an option here. You either take Josh into your arms, jump out of this ship and run for the rest of your life, knowing that I _will_ hurt him if necessary, or put the hatch back into place and forget this ever happen. So what’s it gonna be?”

Tyler clenched his fist and gritted his teeth. That cold, manipulative woman. All of the cells in his body were screaming at him, ‘jump, jump, jump.’, a part of him wanted to feel the wind hitting his face as he fell, the empty feeling of free-falling. He could make it so that Josh wouldn’t be hurt when they reached the ground, surviving the fall was not a problem.

“Ty…” Josh whimpered, on the floor. He couldn’t breathe. Tyler needed to decide now.

With a grunt, he took the door and forced it back into place. The wind stopped. After a while, he heard Josh breathing in deeply, and catching his breath. He waited for Ashlynne’s pleased voice to fill the room, but it never did. Tyler could only imagine her smiling to herself.

“Why?” Josh asked, sitting up. It was not an accusation, like he thought Tyler had made the wrong choice. For Josh there was no wrong choice. He simply wanted to know why.

“I couldn’t put you through that.” He answered while he helped Josh stand up. “I wasn’t sure I would be able to protect you. So I couldn’t risk it.”

He leaned towards him a little, his lips close to his ear. He couldn’t afford Ashlynne listening to what he was about to say, if there were microphones in the room.

“But I will find another way for us to get out of this place.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Patrick didn’t like to think about the fact that he had given up. As a rebel, you’re always taught that if you’re going down, you have to go down swinging. You fight, until the very last second, until your final breath leaves your lungs. If the enemy has you cornered, throw a few punches and kicks even if it’s useless.

But being in the cell for so long had drained him. He reached the point of just sitting and waiting for death. Which was not what you’re meant to do when you’re a fighter. But he did appreciate knowing when it’s enough. Pete, on the other hand, never knew when to back down, and even though that had been a problem and had caused him several headaches, now it had saved his life.

If Pete hadn’t gone against all logic, he wouldn’t be alive right now. Suffocated and buried beneath tons of cinder and cement, that would have been Patrick without Pete.

That’s why he didn’t mind Pete being so clingy all the time, and protective of him. Pete had always being eccentric and outgoing, but now he was more… loving and caring. Patrick couldn’t tell exactly what or why, but something about Pete had changed. Something in his eyes seemed different, like suddenly he had aged and was now more an adult than a teenager. For Patrick, Pete had never stopped being a teenager, he might’ve grown into a man, but deep down he was still full of energy, recklessness, and wonder. And now… it was gone.

He had matured? He did seem wiser than before. Something Patrick liked about Pete was that no matter how hard things got sometimes, the desert didn’t change him. The life as a rebel often did that to people, it hardened them. That had never happened to Pete. Patrick was afraid that was the case. He wouldn’t blame him, though.

Bit by bit Patrick started to regain his strength, and Pete stopped being so worried all the time. He still didn’t know what had happened between Pete and Joe. Sure, Pete was always the one to pick fights for small things, but it wouldn’t last very long. They weren’t even looking at each other, and Andy seemed to be caught in the middle of their bickering. Patrick had abstained from making an intervention, and decided to let them play it out. Except they didn’t. What Patrick didn’t appreciate very much was how they acted around him, Joe often lowered his head whenever he entered the room and his interactions consisted in apologetic looks and long silences.

But Patrick didn’t _know_ what he was apologizing for.

He realized he was doing that thing again. Where he worried about others but didn’t take care of himself. Patrick had seen a lot of rebels who were amputees and were as badass as anyone, but not having his left hand really was affecting him. For starters, his brain wasn’t really processing the fact that his hand was _gone_. He would start tapping the table and then be surprised, because those imaginary fingers he was moving didn’t make any noise. It got ridiculous, to the point where he went to grab something and just hit his wound with it.

He just ignored it whenever that happened, but Pete could see the pain in his eyes.

Pete opened his door and found him changing his bandages, and they both jumped as if Patrick was doing something inappropriate and Pete had just walked in on him. Patrick bit his lower lip and let the bandages fall over the sheets, sighing.

“Can I help you out?” Pete asked cautiously.

Patrick just nodded. As Pete was wrapping the bandages around what was left of his wrist, Patrick just stared at it, as if he could see his hand. He barely felt the familiar sting of the wound, maybe it meant it was healing.

“Patrick?” Pete said suddenly, breaking the silence that had fallen over them.

“Yeah?”

“Can I talk to you… about something a little personal?” He mumbled, and his cheeks turned red all of a sudden.

“Of course, Pete.” He answered, moving closer to him and crossing his legs, ready to listen to whatever his best friend needed to say. It wasn’t the first time Pete had asked if he could talk to him, which basically meant he needed to vent. And Patrick was happy to be there.

“I… have been really lonely, in like, a romantic sense, after everything that happened with Mikey.” He started explaining. Patrick nodded and moved his arm towards Pete’s hand, only to pull away slowly, realizing that arm didn’t have a hand anymore. “And I kinda swore to myself I wouldn’t love anyone anymore. Because he and I…”

“You had a bond.” Patrick completed, shaking his head. “That was so strong you can’t let go of it, even in death. I get that.”

 _Of course he does, he lost Elisa all those years ago…_ , Pete thought to himself, and his plan didn’t seem so bright anymore. Not that it was bright at all anyway.

“But…” Pete bit his lip, and hesitated to say the next sentence. “There’s this guy…”

“Really?!” Patrick chimed, and Pete saw how his eyes lit up. It had been a while since they had done that. Pete felt himself becoming smaller, his insides twisting. “I mean, that’s great! It’s good that you’ve feelings for somebody, like, feeling that kind of thing again, it’s amazing! Sorry I’m kind of rambling, I’m just really happy for you, Pete. Tell me tell me more about him!”

Patrick knew how sad and torn Pete had been after what had happened to Mikey. He was worried that his friend would have to wander with that broken heart for years, but now he had found someone, and Patrick thought Pete really deserved to love and be loved again.

Pete’s heart clenched painfully. He’s happy he had a crush on _someone_. What was he supposed to do now? Watch how his smile faded when he told him it was him?

“He’s…” Pete’s voice trembled, so he looked away from Patrick’s curious expression. “Amazing. He’s um… blond, and his eyes are like… blue but green at the same time. And… he’s really tiny, even more than me.”

Pete was screaming internally by this point. But Patrick seemed completely oblivious about those features being his exact description. He even looked like he was thinking really hard, trying to find somebody blond, with blue-green eyes and smaller than Pete.

“Do I know this guy?” he asked, frowning.

 _Oh, do you know this guy._ Pete thought, and the situation couldn’t get any worse. But because he was Pete, he managed to do just that.

“He’s really sweet, and loving, and nice to other people. He’s a little shy, but I think that’s cute. I think he is cute. And the thing is that I’ve known him for a long while, and just now I realize how great he is. It’s like… something changed and suddenly I started feeling…”

“Butterflies?” Patrick asked, with the sweetest smile on his face. He looked so adorable…

“Yeah, butterflies all over my stomach. And my heart starts going really fast whenever he looks at me.” His heart was, in fact, trying to beat its way out of his chest. “And I think I might be in love with him.”

Patrick literally turned his head to the side and went ‘aaawww’. This time, he did grab Pete’s wrist with his hand, looked at him right in the eyes, and said:

“Mikey must be so happy right now.”

Pete scoffed, and smiled a little. _Mikey must be either laughing his ass off at how pathetic and painful this is, or cringing out of second-hand embarrassment._

“I wish he would like me back, because well… I could make him see how amazing he is. He’s got this kind of thing where he doesn’t realize he is the most adorable and incredible person there is and I really want him to know that but…”

“Oh, Pete. You’re so cute when you’re in love.” Patrick beamed. Pete completely changed when he was in love with someone. Patrick had seen it a couple times, and he really wished this new guy could be just like the way it was with Mikey. When his heart started beating for another person, Pete changed from tough and reckless to tough and reckless that can be turned into a puddle, blushes and gives the best smooches.

“It scares me, though.” Pete murmured to himself.

“Love is always scary.” He shrugged. “But it can become the best feeling in the world. And I really hope it does.”

Pete wanted nothing more than to scream ‘It’s you, silly! I’m in love with _you_!’ But he couldn’t do that. Instead he just gave Patrick a half smile and sighed.

“Thanks buddy. Hey, is that hand of yours giving you trouble?” Patrick’s expression fell, and he held his wrist with his hand, looking down. Pete regretted bringing that up.

“I guess. It’s just weird really. To have an arm that ends in a useless stump.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll get you a cool hook for it. And then you can be a pirate.”

“Don’t jinx it, I don’t want to lose an eye, or have to wear a peg leg” he joked, and it seemed to lift the mood a little bit. Before the silence could get any more awkward, a very tired Andy opened the door, panting hard, his eyes full of worry.

“We have a problem. A big one.”

Pete jumped into action, following Andy out of the room and hearing the roaring of engines get louder and louder. Joe was also up, and looking out the window. His hand was clenching the ray gun tightly, as a curse slipped through his lips. Patrick’s eyes wandered around them, looking for an answer, Andy was looking distressed and playing with his hands.

“We got no time to escape. We’ll have to fight a whole unit of them.”

“What? How did they find us? This place is supposed to be deserted!” Pete asked, feeling electric chills go up his spine. He heard Patrick gasp, and when he turned around he was holding the back of his neck and looked like he was about to cry. He looked up to him and whispered:

“They’ve got a tracker on me.”

Pete let out the air he was holding and ruffled his hair for a moment, thinking about what to do. They didn’t kill Patrick, they just kidnapped him and if they put a tracker on him, they must want him alive. Or they’re just using him as bait to get them all and kill them. Whatever reason it was, none of the Youngbloods were letting BL/ind take any member of their family. Patrick was completely out of shape, and even if he protested he was the main priority. Pete was not going to lose him again.

But when the unit actually burst through the door, it all went by in a blur and was probably over in a couple seconds. They all hoped to put up a longer fight, but when the enemy is outnumbering you and has big loud guns, there’s not so much a three man team can do. What they realized though, was that even if Korse himself was there, they weren’t coming to kill them. No, BL/ind often liked to play sick games and this was one of them.

The dracs got hold of Joe and Andy, and dragged them out of the building while they kicked and screamed with all their might. Pete on the other hand had a gun pointed at his head and was unable to move without risking getting shot, and Patrick was kind of in the same situation. Korse looked at them both, smiling at Pete but frowning at Patrick.

“I thought you were dead.” He said out loud, looking genuinely confused. “You really are a tough cookie, huh.”

Suddenly, the soldier holding the gun to Pete’s head pushed him forward, and let him stumble over into the middle of the room, the others circling around him. Korse walked up to him and Pete considered kicking him in the shin and make a run for it, but decided against it since Patrick was still a hostage.

“Oh, Believer.” He sighed. “You really are a trouble maker.”

Pete growled at him and kept clenching and unclenching his fists, trying to keep his cool. Anger was flaring up in his chest and he felt like he just needed to get it out somehow. Korse kept talking, but Pete’s attention was drifting between the giant man standing before him and his best friend trying to break free. Pete wanted to yell at him to stop struggling, afraid the drac holding him would shoot him.

“Always running around with your reckless attitude. Almost suicidal.” The BL/ind leader continued. “And those rebels that just don’t seem to be afraid to die are the most dangerous, and the most difficult ones. Some are even impossible to turn. Most of you guys have embedded in your pretty little heads that I am your enemy, but the truth is I don’t have to be. We don’t have to fight, and that means no one has to die.”

Pete didn’t believe anything Korse said. He knew better. But what he was saying did seem tempting. To stop fighting? To be safe? All that was appealing to any rebel, especially one like Pete who had lived through a lot of fighting and had seen death occur countless times. But to stop fighting meant to submit. And rebels did not submit.

“People like him” Korse said, and pointed at Patrick, who froze in place. “Are the ones that can make peace possible. They’re rational, mature, and objective. They are the ones who can overlook the popular rebel beliefs and actually get to an agreement.”

“I would never come to an agreement with you!” Patrick said, clenching his teeth and giving Korse a murderous look. 

“Oh but you will.” Korse laughed, and made a gestures with his hand that made the drac holding Patrick push him forward. “I need people like you, Phoenix. Strong, determined. But your heart is too big, and trust me that will be a problem. You’re too attached to this people, Phoenix, I need you to let them go…”

“As if I would do anything like that.” Patrick interrupted him, and Korse didn’t seem too pleased by that. He wanted Patrick to be on his side, that’s why he went through the trouble of putting a tracker on the guy. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but that didn’t mean he liked it. He opened his hand and one of his soldiers placed a gun on his palm, and he proceeded to toss it in the circle, at Patrick’s feet. As he expected, the Youngblood picked it up and pointed it at him. Korse was about to explain why that wasn’t a smart idea, but Believer did that for him with just one look.

“I do think you’ll make this deal. Both Inked Serpent and Alpha Dog are good, they’re like you in a way. There’s only one problem with you guys. Him.” He said, making a gesture towards Pete with his long fingers. “I can’t have the trouble-maker, Phoenix. I’m sure you understand that.”

“I won’t go with you.” He whispered, clenching the gun in his hand.

“I can make you, that’s not a problem.”

Two dracs stepped forward and held both of Pete’s arms behind his back, making him gasp in surprise.

“Shoot him.” Korse demanded. “That way I’ll know your heart won’t be a problem, which means you and the other two guys outside get to live. Or shoot yourself, because I can’t have a soft-hearted man in my lines. But without you the other two won’t follow me, so I might as well go back to try to kill them as I do with any other rebel. Either way, it’s your choice.”

Patrick looked at him, horrified. Korse just smiled and made a ‘go ahead’ gesture. Patrick’s breathing hitched and he let out a shaky sigh, his hand starting to tremble. He blinked twice, trying to focus since his sight had started swirling from all the panic washing over him.

“Patrick.” Pete whispered, and when Patrick finally made eye-contact with him his blue-green eyes were full of fear. He tried to soothe him without words, just looking at him with eyes full of compassion. “It’s okay. Don’t be scared.”

“I can’t do it.” Patrick whispered back, so low only Pete was able to hear him.

“Yes you can.” He tried to convince him. Black Believer was not afraid to die. He had never been. And if him dying meant his brothers would stay alive, then so be it. He didn’t care if Patrick was the one to shoot him. He rather have him do it than a random draculoid. But Pete wasn’t really thinking about how Patrick would feel in the moment, how he would feel afterwards, just his own end. How would he feel if instead it was him shooting Patrick? Would he really have the strength to raise the gun and pull the trigger?

No, probably not.

So he wasn’t surprised when Patrick started shaking his head and mouthing ‘no’ while his eyes filled with tears. Pete’s heart broke a little bit further. _No one_ should have to make that kind of decision Patrick was being forced to make.

“Please, ‘Trick.” He begged. “Shoot me, it doesn’t matter.”

He shook his head once again. Pete hadn’t been _truly_ scared until he saw Patrick raise the gun and point it at himself. He pressed the barrel of the gun under his jawline ad sighed deeply. This time it was Pete shaking his head and saying ‘no’ over and over again.

“Patrick, Patrick, stop it. No, no. Put the gun down. You can’t do this.”

“Yes I can.” He said, and his voice broke.

“Shoot _me_.” he pleaded, tears rolling down his cheeks as the drac’s grip got tighter on him.

“No.” Patrick said, and his voice wasn’t trembling anymore. Instead, he smiled. “I could never hurt you.”

“Why…” Pete sobbed, and he didn’t mean to say that word out loud. Why? Why couldn’t Patrick just use him as a scapegoat, let him be a martyr and do something good for a change? Why couldn’t Patrick let _him_ be the one sacrificing himself for once?

“Because I love you.” He whispered, and gave Pete a look so full of love it made his heart skip a beat.

Korse was watching everything closely, his eyebrows raised at the scene playing in front of him. He was getting a little impatient. He wasn’t a fan of this kind of sentimentalism and drama. Patrick closed his eyes tightly and graced over the trigger, ready to press into it but actually really scared of what would happen next. He prayed for his guys to be okay afterwards. He begged for Pete to forgive him someday. He knew it would be over quickly. He took comfort on it. “ _Just pull it. It will be easy, fast, like turning off the lights…”_ he thought.

“PATRICK, NO!” he heard Pete scream, but he pulled the trigger anyway.

And it clicked. And did nothing else. Everything seemed to stop as Patrick opened his eyes in surprise. It must’ve been a mistake. He cocked the gun and pulled the trigger again, fast and hoping this time it would work. It didn’t. He did it again. Nothing. Meanwhile Pete was developing various stress ulcers as Patrick went through the whole chamber, afraid there was actually a bullet in there. There wasn’t. But that didn’t make any sense. Why would Korse give Patrick an empty gun?

“Well, that was an interesting choice, American Phoenix.” Korse said, and took his own gun out, pointing it at Patrick. “Let me just…”

He was interrupted by the door being opened violently, and both Patrick and Pete saw a familiar face barge in along with a woman they had never seen. Korse’s expression fell as the woman walked in with her chin up, giving him a defiant look, almost triumphant. Blurryface was by her side, holding his hand up to Korse with empty eyes.

Suddenly, Korse’s hand started to dry out, veins popping up like little snakes under his greyish skin, and he grunted in pain. It made him drop the gun and hold his wrist, looking at Blurryface with shock. Soon the leader fell to his knees and looked up to the guy holding him down with some force he couldn’t explain. It wasn’t the same guy who had smiled at him with red eyes when he told him about his plans. It wasn’t the same guy who had helped him bend the world and make it kneel before him.

But he looked like him. It was the same power. And now the tables had been turned horribly.

Blurryface could easily kill him right there, but then again someone didn’t want that to happen. The woman with the white hair. She just seemed to be in the right place, right time, always. There was something about her, how she went back and forth between the enemy and him, like she was desperately trying to fix something. She gave Ashlynne a look of anger, and then she flicked her eyes over to Blurryface. There was a hint of recognition in the guy’s eyes, and a speck of surprise when he felt a wave of her power hit him back.

She wasn’t strong enough, she wouldn’t stand a chance against the real Blurryface. But it wasn’t quite him, it was also Tyler. That little detail let her get away with Korse and his army. Even though he escaped, Ashlynne smiled. She didn’t want the games to end just yet. She was the kind of player who wanted to win, but also enjoy. It was something she could do, make the game a little longer just for the thrill of it.

Because she was winning. And while Korse was now far away from her, she said a word he was sure to hear.

_Check_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! it's late but I really wanted to finish this chapter.  
> it's a good way to keep going this new year.  
> Comments and kudos are very much appreciated <3  
> Hope you have a great week! ;)


	6. You Are Not Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Many different things happened, things that many people have been dreaming about for a long time.  
> For some it is glorious.  
> For others doesn't go as planned.

Korse doesn’t know if he can call himself lucky. He doesn’t want to call himself lucky. Being lucky just meant he had to be saved by something so vague like fate. But now he doubted it was fate at all. Korse had known Devotee for quite a while, ever since he started working with Blurryface and his kind of people. But Devotee was different from the others; she tended not to be violent, and wouldn’t side with anyone. She just, watched.

She had never agreed nor disagreed with him, and now she was saving him from a certain death? Something must have changed. That Devotee was taking action in his favor meant something must be off. Korse could see past her mysterious façade and notice how badly she wanted things to be alright for everyone. Why? Her people rarely take interest in what happens with the mortals.

She seemed exhausted, her hair wasn’t so pure white anymore, and her skin had a sick greenish tone. This wasn’t the powerful woman who had blinded hundreds.

“Listen, it’s not like I don’t appreciate this but…” he started saying, but got cut off by her ice-cold glare.

“Do not thank me for this.” She muttered, shaking her head. “I simply made a mistake, altered the course of events and now I’m trying to fix it. That’s all.”

“By helping me?” it just didn’t make any sense.

“Don’t flatter yourself, Korse.” She spat, clearly annoyed. “There’s a reason I don’t take sides. And that’s because both sides are crooked and I shall not be part of any of it.”

“What do you mean? You say you don’t take sides and all that bullshit but you’re helping me, which means going against S.I.G.H.T.”

“There’s only one person I’m rooting for. And that isn’t you. Neither is her.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gerard had been bored out of his mind for the last few days. He knew something was going on, he wasn’t deaf to the whispering between soldiers. But when Ashlynne said he wasn’t allowed out, she meant it. Gerard didn’t understand how being locked in a room by himself was supposed to help him, instead it was driving him even more insane. His brain was going crazy since it had nothing to do, and it caused Gerard to be in a mood swing all the time. He knew deep down that throwing a tantrum wasn’t going to help his situation, so he quietly waited for Ashlynne to decide he had learned his lesson.

Gerard wasn’t learning any lesson. He wasn’t wrong. He wanted something, and life had taught him that sitting down like a good boy didn’t get him anywhere. He had to go and get it. He didn’t care if he ‘challenged Ashlynne’s authority’, it wasn’t like he was another soldier she could order around. As far as he was concerned, she was the one working to fulfill his request and conditions. Meaning he was of some importance to her. Apparently that had all gone out the window because as soon as she found out he was an addict, he lost all the privilege he had.

He was troubled, there was no denying that, but to Gerard that didn’t mean he deserved to be treated like a child. While he was having one of the many talks with himself, humming tunes that didn’t quite exist, a voice filled the room through the speakers.

_“We’d like to inform you that our aircraft is in process of landing. Captain’s orders.”_

So after months of being in the air, they were going to solid ground. That actually sounded like good news to Gerard, but he still wondered if he would have the chance to step out of the huge flying machine he wasn’t really fond of. Luckily his room didn’t have any windows, and as long as he imagined he was in a giant bus, he didn’t get anxious about being suspended thousands of feet in the air.

The low and now familiar rumble of the engines came to a stop, and Gerard’s door opened with a click. He lost no time in sprinting down the hall and maybe get lost a couple times before finding the exit he had yearned for so long. Once he stepped into the sand, something shifted. Like what had been wrong was now back into place. He looked at his worn out boots, the golden sand below them and felt the slight warm on his soles. Breathing was easier now that it wasn’t the stale, synthetic air of the ship. The dying sun he had loved and hated bathed his skin, and he felt like he was home. And empty, soundless home, but still home.

He looked up to the darkening sky and saw something he hadn’t expected. A cloud. A big, grey cloud was looming over his head, and suddenly a loud sound shook the ground below his feet. His hairs stood on end for no reason and he felt something wet hit his head. When he raised his hand to touch his hair, another little drop fell on his nose. Startled, he gasped just as the water came down on him like a waterfall, all at once. Gerard stood there in awe, watching his hands fill with water and his clothes getting damped. He saw the sand turning dark as another thunder echoed through the field.

_It was raining._

Gerard with all his years living in the desert had never seen actual rain falling from the sky. The only storms most rebels knew were made of sand. Some even said it didn’t rain anymore, that it was just a myth. Gerard never believed them, but that would explain why everything was so dead even for a desert. The water they drank came from Battery City, so it wasn’t a surprise nothing other than them was able to survive out there. But now there was an actual storm, dark clouds were raining down gallons and gallons of water all at a time, making it almost impossible to hear anything but the sound of the water crashing down.

It was also really hard to see. Gerard had only taken a few steps away from the ship, and was currently the only one outside. The rest of the crew was taking cover from the rain at the mouth of the ship and waiting for more orders. Frankly, Gerard didn’t care about the reason why they had landed, he was out of there and that was all that mattered. There were some figures in the distance, dark and unrecognizable, but Gerard knew they were people. And Gerard was incredibly happy to see people, seeing people meant someone had survived out there after the Poisonous Battle. Someone’s loved one was alive, it wasn’t all death and despair. He felt joyful, even if he knew the figures weren’t someone he loved. He suddenly remember how alone he was, and hoped even more for someone to find their brother, sister, boyfriend, girlfriend or just a comrade in that group of people that were slowly and cautiously approaching the ship.

The only thing that guided all those rebels were two dots of multicolored light that kept changing from blue to green to purple. It took him a while to realize those were _eyes_. They looked weirdly familiar… Not too far from the source of light, there was a figure Gerard felt it was staring at him. The person had long hair and was… really short… As they all came closer, Gerard realized who it was. The vest, the long sleeved stripped shirt, and the jet black hair that was soaked and sticking to his temples.

“Gee…” he saw him mouth, before he started running towards him.

Gerard started running too, not really aware of what his legs were doing. All he could think of was ‘Frank’s not dead’, he had no doubt the little man was his loved one. He wasn’t completely alone. He wasn’t the one with no one to hug.

They collided quite painfully, but neither of them cared. They threw arms around each other and squeezed harshly. Gerard buried his face on Frank’s soaked hair, feeling the smell of rain, completely out of breath. He felt Frank’s hands grip his clothes as if Gerard was the only solid thing in the world. They held each other in a painfully tight hug, and Gerard felt his chest grow warmer, and fill up. The emptiness he felt in his heart, which had been weighting him down all this time, was now full of Frank. Frank was the only thing that mattered in that moment, and his eyes watered as he processed that he was finally there, that the nights spent screaming and crying his name were over. The sadness, the despair, the hopelessness and emptiness were all over.

It was Frank the one to pull back a little just to grab Gerard by the hair and smash their lips together in a desperate, hungry kiss. It was a mess. They were both trembling, not entirely from the cold, and they kept breathing heavily trying to figure out what to do with their hands. It was just that they couldn’t get enough of each other. There was so much pain involved that whatever they did just _wasn’t enough_ to show exactly how much it had hurt to be apart. They did not let go for a very long while, the world didn’t exist, didn’t matter.

“Frankie…” Gerard whispered in a shaky breath, their lips still touching. “I love you, Frankie, I love you so much…”

Frank could hear the pain in Gerard’s voice as he kept whispering the same three words that Frank had dreamed about hearing for years. ‘Gee loves me back, he loves me back’ he thought. Everything about Gerard was beautifully overwhelming. His hands, his lips, his scent, his skin jabbed with old scars. Everything was chaotically perfect.

“I love you too, I love you.” he whispered back into his ear, like sharing a secret. “I missed you, so fucking much.”

“I thought you were dead… I thought I’d lost you… I thought I was…”

“You’re not.” Frank said, caressing his back as his shoulders shook with sobs. “You’re not alone.”

“Never let me go, Frank, please…” he pleaded, his voice breaking.

“I’m not leaving anymore, okay?” Frank said, consoling him. “I’m here, I’m staying with you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ashlynne watched the two rebels hug and kiss under the rain, and couldn’t help but smile. She looked behind her to see four guys all leaning on each other, tired and in pain. She smiled at that too. Korse may have gotten away, but the fact that the Youngbloods were with her was far more important. With all the rebels reunited, Ashlynne couldn’t be happier.

She had all the pieces she wanted, it was time to start playing for real.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ashlynne had them all sit in a conference room, soaked and trembling harshly. Pete and Patrick were still in shock for what had happened and neither of them had looked at each other in the eye since the events at the diner. Joe and Andy weren’t talking much either. Gerard had a spark in his eyes, his lips curved into a smirk of delight from seeing all his friends safe and sound. Frank had Gerard’s hand between his and was drawing smooth circles with his thumb. Dark Spades was also there, his galaxy eyes reading everyone in the room, including Ashlynne, but he didn’t say anything. All the other rebels travelling with him were in the ship too and they were back in the sky.

Tyler Joseph was sitting besides Ashlynne, his fingers intertwined and looking absent. His mind was elsewhere, something he did whenever Ashlynne would treat him as a weapon, which was something he knew he would have to get used to. In reality he was thinking about Josh.

“Gentlemen, it is my pleasure to have you all with me.” She started talking, a kind smile on her face. “Here, you’ll be taken care of, so you do not need to worry about your needs. I acknowledge you’re all very strong, very capable men. And that’s the reason you’re alive, and the reason you’re here.”

She continued to explain who she was, what S.I.G.H.T was, and some of their objectives, which were basically taking BL/ind down. Everyone in the room was listening to what she was saying; fighting the exhaustion they all felt. Ashlynne noticed how they were blinking rapidly, shifting in their seats trying to stay focused. She understood that, but the information she needed to get across was more important.

“There has been a recent change in the game, that many rebels have not taken into account yet, and it is of extreme importance. We’re not the only ones fighting this war; there are… people, like my partner Tyler Joseph over here.” Tyler just blinked and his eyes went red for a moment, making them all tense up. “But mainly what’s inside him. An entity you are all familiar with, named Blurryface. Now I assure you, being aware of what Blurryface has done in the past, that he will be no harm to you or anyone in this ship. Tyler is now in complete control; therefore he is able to harvest his power with no repercussion. Now, there are more entities like Blurryface, one of them being the woman with white hair you may have seen. They both make part of a group we call The Five. This has to do with the war because they are the most powerful weapon there is, and now we know the white-haired woman is working with BL/ind…”

“Devotee.” Pete mumbled. It was the first thing he had said since they entered the room. “Her name is Devotee.”

“Very well.” Ashlynne answered, pleased. “We drew the parallels between The Five and the five stages of grief, Denial, Anger, Bargain, Depression and Acceptance. Blurryface is in fact, Depression, and Devotee is believed to be Denial. Which can only mean Anger, Acceptance and Bargain are still out there and just imagine what their powers can do for us, but what they can also do for the enemy. Now I only want you to know that with you on our side, Blurryface’s power and S.I.G.H.T, we are closer to winning this war than we have ever been, any of us. We will win this war, together.”

Ashlynne finished her speech and looked around, seeing how everyone had somehow been inspired by it, were sitting straighter and looking at her in the eye. She smiled. But there was someone she couldn’t quite convince. Phoenix, the blond with only one hand. He didn’t look determined like the others; he was staring at her with his head to the side, without saying a word. He didn’t believe her? What could she say to get him to trust her? Ashlynne knew that if the leader of the Youngbloods didn’t trust her, none of them would.

“You can go; my people will show you where you can rest. American Phoenix, I’m going to ask you to stay for a while longer.”

“If he stays, we all stay.” Joe said firmly, and Andy and Pete both nodded.

“Very well.” Ashlynne whispered, watching as Gerard, Fun Ghoul and Tyler exited the room. She made a few calls with her back turned to the Youngbloods, and a few minutes later a soldier came into the room, holding something wrapped with a black cloth. Ashlynne thanked him with a nod, and then turned to Patrick.

“May I ask, Phoenix, how did you lose your hand?”

Patrick swallowed visibly and gripped the arm of the chair. Pete looked at him with a concerned look, but Patrick just sighed and answered:

“I was held captive at a BL/ind base. They wanted me to make a distress call so they would come to save me and get trapped too. Of course, I refused to do such thing. They tortured me, and chopped my hand off.”

“BL/ind sent it to us.” Pete added. He heard Patrick’s breathing hitch. He wasn’t aware of that. “As an act of war.”

“I see.” Ashlynne said, the object still in her hands. “I recognize your incredible loyalty. But please, let me help you.”

She unraveled the object and let the cloth fall to the ground, revealing a shiny, metal hand. The room fell silent as the Youngbloods stared at the machine with wide eyes.

“We have some amputees here.” She explained. “And this is our way of helping them. This mechanical replacement has all the dexterity of a real hand, and it is also lighter and stronger. It connects with your nerves so it is fully functional. Would you like to try it?”

Patrick bit his lips but nodded, offering Ashlynne his left arm, his stump still covered in bandages. Pete tensed up while Ashlynne walked towards his leader, and starting to unwrap his wound. It was mostly healed by now, but that didn’t make it any less unpleasant to see. Patrick inhaled sharply when the cold metal touched his skin, and let out a scream of pain once the machine connected with his nerves. This made all three Youngbloods stand up and rush to his side, glaring at Ashlynne as if she had just hurt him.

Patrick held his wrist tightly, but slowly started to let go as he recovered the mobility he had thought was lost forever. He marveled at the metal fingers, and closed his fist slowly. He turned his wrist and flexed each one of his fingers, smiling when the hand responded to all his commands.

“It might take a while to get used to, but it is certainly worth it.” Ashlynne added, smiling to herself.

“Thank you.” Patrick murmured, and Ashlynne saw true gratitude in his eyes. She also saw the same kind of gratitude in Believer’s eyes, which dedicated her a long, thankful look. The Youngbloods excused themselves out of the room and Ashlynne decided to call it a day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Patrick went out of the room without saying a word. He was having very mixed feelings and needed some time to think. On one side Ashlynne seemed to be very generous and fall right into rebel standards and objectives. But on the other side, Patrick was really confident when it came to his judgment, and Patrick did not trust Ashlynne.

He had spent the whole reunion reading her as a person. How she moved, how she talked and the words she used. Her eyes. He say a woman with power, maybe too much of it. He was still doubtful about this, because what if he was wrong? What if Ashlynne was their big opportunity to finally end the war? So he decided to wait out. Get a little more evidence in favor and against before deciding if he should be on her side or go rogue on her.

Patrick was evasive for almost a week. The other Youngbloods wanted to talk to him, but he kept dismissing them and apologizing for it.

Firstly he went to Tyler. There was something awfully different about him. But that was because of his new-found power and Patrick was in no position to judge, given he didn’t know exactly what Tyler felt. But next to him, was Josh. Josh had always been a little nervous but very protective of Tyler, and it seemed like the tables had been turned. Patrick assumed something was wrong between Josh and Ashlynne, because of the way she treated him, especially when Tyler wasn’t around.

She was harsh with him, put in unnecessary slurs in her sentences and just treated him like he was a bother. And Patrick could tell that really brought Josh down. But when Tyler was in the same room, things were different. Ashlynne would still have that hatred in her voice, but would mostly be polite. Tyler glared at her, probably knowing what she did and said when he wasn’t present. Tyler was also treated differently from other rebels. To put it in simple words, Ashlynne had objectified Tyler and was treating him… like a weapon.

That was what set Patrick off. How Ashlynne didn’t care about Tyler as a person and mistreated Josh, calling him useless.

But as if to confirm his worries, Bachelor came into the picture. Patrick was absolutely delighted to see he was alive, and literally everyone was. They had all been really worried about Bachelor after everything that happened, they all knew he was all alone now and some even tried to find him, but never succeeded. It was nice to see that it all turned out okay. Except Patrick noticed it wasn’t completely okay. Bachelor – no, Brendon wasn’t the same. Sure, he had bags under his eyes, his sleeping pattern was a mess and you could see him roaming around at any hour of the night, he had bruises and scars he didn’t talk about, but all that was very common in rebels.

What really gave him away was his fear. Him rubbing his hands against each other so much the skin was starting to peel off. The shifty eyes, making himself look smaller, stopping in the middle of a sentence when someone comes into the room. Keeping a considerable distance with people, flinching every time someone raised a hand or made a quick movement towards him.

He had been abused. Tortured.

When Patrick tried to talk to him about it, he became really defensive and scared, begging and pleading him not to tell anyone. Not to tell her. Patrick asked if she had done that to him, but that sent him into a state of so much distress he decided to leave it. He was not done, but he needed to give Brendon some time.

Ashlynne didn’t want the war to end; she wanted to win it, to be powerful. Patrick doesn’t want power, he wants freedom. To his eyes those two tend not to be the same thing.

Patrick was in his assigned room, walking up and down thinking about exactly how he would tell his guys about Ashlynne. In that moment, the door opened and Pete entered the room.

“I’m done, Patrick. I’m done with you ignoring us. We’re going to talk right now and there isn’t an excuse you can use to get out.” He said, crossing his arms against his chest, visibly frustrated.

“I need to talk to you…” Patrick started, but stopped when Pete scoffed at him.

“No, I’m gonna do the talking here.” He stated firmly, and Patrick just stayed silent. “I wanted to say this as soon as it happened, but you just didn’t let me, didn’t give me a chance. I want… I need to talk about what happened at the diner. With the gun.”

Oh.

“Pete…”

“No, don’t say anything. I just want to know one thing: why did you do it.”

“I already answered that question.”

“Patrick!” he shouted, tears of anger starting to prick on his eyes.

“I could never, ever hurt you, Pete. You mean too much to me. And there is nothing you can say that would make me change my mind about what I did, about the decision I took. You need to know that if I’m ever in that position again, I will always choose to save you. Even if it means I don’t make it, that’s what I mean when I say I would die for you.”

“I don’t want you to die for me!”

“Pete, I would rather chop my other hand off than killing you to save my own life.”

“Because you love me…” Pete whispered in a sad tone, as if it was a curse that had fallen upon him.

“Yes, because I love you.” Patrick repeated, and took a step closer to Pete when he saw him furiously rub his eyes to get rid of the tears.

“You can’t keep doing this to me. You can’t. This needs to stop.” he mumbled, looking at him with pleading eyes.

“Pete, what is it that you mean? I already told you I…”

“You can’t keep doing this to me because I love you, Patrick Stump.”

"I-I….” he stuttered. For some reason those words cut his breathing, and Pete started to take small steps towards him.

“This is more than just me loving my leader, my best friend.” He continued, and Patrick stepped back as Pete moved forward. “What I feel for you is way stronger. Is something so big it messes with my brain, I can’t take you out of my thoughts and I can’t think straight when I’m around you.”

“Pete…” Patrick almost sobbed, wanting to stop his friend from continuing but his back hit the wall and he got extremely close to him.

“I feel this… chills. Something I can’t control. I need you, Patrick. You make breathing easier when I’m panicking, you make living brighter. Without you I am absolutely miserable, and it hurts me just thinking about how close I came to lose you. You can’t do that to me Patrick, you can’t leave me too. All the things I said when I told you I was in love with someone, they’re all sincere, all true. But you didn’t realize it was you. It has always been you.”

Pete was now inches away from Patrick, their breaths mixing together in a warm cloud. Patrick was about to say something, when Pete suddenly pressed his lips against his and placed his hands on his cheeks. Patrick’s blue-green eyes widened in surprise and his hands started to shake uncontrollably. All he could think of was Pete’s chapped lips against his own and how confused he was about it. His knees felt weak and his brain started panicking, screaming for him to stop, to push him away but he froze in place, Pete’s hands and lips becoming rougher on his skin.

“Pete… stop it.” he managed to whisper.

“Patrick… please… I want you.” he breathed out.

“You’re scaring me… cut it out...” Patrick whimpered.

Finally, with his chest tightened and tears in his eyes, he placed his shaking hands on Pete’s chest and pushed him away from him as hard as he could. Pete stumbled backwards and lost his balance, falling on his butt.

“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” he screamed, tears falling down his cheeks. At first he had been really scared because what he felt was confusing, but now he was fucking pissed.

“Patrick…” Pete cried from the floor, but flinched back when he screamed at him again.

“NO! RESPECT MY FUCKING BOUNDARIES! IF I DON’T WANT TO KISS YOU THEN IT’S A NO PETE WENTZ.”

The black-haired man hung his head in shame, and didn’t bother to get up. He looked up to Patrick with eyes full of tears and regret, opening his mouth to say something but nothing came out, Pete was out of words, he couldn’t make a sound to show how disgusted he was with himself and how much heart-crushing guilt he was feeling in that moment.

“I’m sorry I shouted at you, but you’re being an asshole.” Patrick said, a little calmer this time.

Pete stayed on his knees and wept with his face hidden in his palms. His sobbing made Patrick’s heart clench painfully, and he knelt in front of him. Slowly, he pulled Pete into a hug and let him cry on his shoulder, softly rubbing his back.

“I know you’re sorry.” Patrick whispered after Pete tried to say something but couldn’t because of how hard he was crying. “You just haven’t said it yet. Never do that again to anyone, Pete. Hey, hey, look at me.” Patrick held Pete’s face with his hands and made him stare into his eyes. “What you did wasn’t right, but I forgive you. You are not alone, you hear me? I forgive you.”

Pete started to calm down after that, and Patrick stared at him without taking his hands away. Pete, his best friend, the one he had so close to his heart. Pete liked him. Pete was in love with him. Patrick couldn’t blame Pete for feeling that way, it wasn’t his fault and he shouldn’t be mad about it. He stared at his eyelashes dripping with tears, his swollen eyelids and the redness of his nose. Finally, his eyes wondered to his lips, red and swollen as well, and slowly leaned forward…

Patrick kissed him, softly and briefly, closing his eyes and trying, really trying to _feel_ something more than what he really felt for Pete.

But the heart doesn’t work that way.

He pulled back and apologized a million times; Pete saying it was okay, that he just needed some time alone. He said he was sorry properly once Patrick helped him into bed, and he just said he forgave him already.

“What have I done?” Pete cried to himself in the darkness of the room as he tossed around in bed. He wrapped himself in blankets and sobbed, feeling worse than ever before.

Patrick went into Pete’s room and slept there. The bed had his scent and the blankets also smelled like him. After staring at the ceiling for almost an hour, Patrick cried. He cried for the wrong reasons, tears like that shouldn’t ever be spilled.

“Why can’t I just love him?” he choked out, feeling a deep pain in his chest he was sure was going to be there for quite a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heeeeeeyyyy! I'm back.  
> I felt like writing this story again after this long time, I just didnt want to leave it to be yet another abandoned and incomplete story.  
> and I can say there's more to come ;)  
> have a really good day/night! <3


	7. I Thought I Could Trust You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dark Spades does not trust Ashlynne or S.I.G.H.T in general, but he doesn't know how far he's willing to go to do something about it. 
> 
> Sometimes love doesn't have the label of 'boyfriend'. Patrick and Pete are about to see that.
> 
> Gerard keeps secrets from Frank for a reason. He's about to find out why that's not a good reason.

Dark Spades knew how to read people. It was his gift, the gift of perception and persuasion. People couldn’t really keep secrets from him; they just felt compelled to tell him when he asked. He had been around for a while and never had he encountered someone like Ashlynne. Her vibe was a whole new thing for him, and it was like his gift wasn’t fully functional on her. He didn’t know why. Dark Spades could trust people really quickly, given he could see pass their facades, but not with her. So he ended up being really cautious around S.I.G.H.T in general.

Sleeping hadn’t been a problem for quite some time, so while the lights were dim and everyone was asleep, Dark Spades roamed the ship silently. He was really interested in it, the guards, the patients, the art on the walls; it was something he had never seen before. None of the rebels that were now on the ship knew about S.I.G.H.T, and Dark Spades wasn’t the only one wondering why they hadn’t showed up earlier.

Someone who didn’t sleep much either was this guy named Tyler Joseph. He was always awake when Dark Spades was in his nightly roams, but he stayed in a room, probably with his lover Josh. Even so, Dark Spades could _feel_ he was awake, the power he gave off told him where he was in the ship, he could track him like a hound. Tyler did sleep, and his aura dimmed when he did. Dark Spades could tell Tyler didn’t trust Ashlynne either, and he figured he was still there because of a bigger purpose. He knew that bigger purpose was Josh.

The inhabitants of the ship were all different, unique in their own way. They were people after all. But there was someone who stood up and got his attention. Nicotined Bachelor.

Dark Spades had always been fascinated by rebels, the ones who lived out in the desert day after day, that were beaten down quite a lot and were still full of… color. Rebels were full of color. Full of Vibrancy. And Dark Spades loved that. But Bachelor, something had taken away his color. His essence. He was crooked, broken. And Dark Spades wanted to fix that.

His attitude gave him some clues, and it was really hard to approaching him without harming his already weak aura. But Dark Spades made it, and got to talk to him privately.

“I know you’re scared.” He was saying after Bachelor had a mild breakdown and Dark Spades had talked him through it. “But if you tell me what’s going on, I might be able to help you. I won’t let anyone hurt you, you can trust me.”

Bachelor was curled up in the corner, staring at the other man’s eyes. When he looked deep into the color-changing orbs in front of him, he felt… peaceful. Like everything was going to be okay. This guy was so tender and understanding with him that he felt like he could tell him everything.

“I saw what she did to Josh.” Brendon started saying, getting his strength from Dark Spade’s tender touch. “She used him. She doesn’t care about Josh, or about any of the people in this ship. All she wanted was to get Tyler out of his coma so she could use him too. I’m scared, I really am because everyone here thinks she is so great and kind but she’s bad. She’s bad, I know she is because I… because I…”

It became hard to breathe again but Dark Spades calmed him down… somehow. It was something quite magical, to be around him.

“Because I’ve seen what she can do. What she did to me so I didn’t talk or screw up her plans. It worked…”

Suddenly, Dark Spades wrapped his arms around Bachelor and held his head close to his chest. Brendon then felt his heartbeat, a constant, soft beating. He felt like he was in a place where no one could get to him. The guy literally gave magic hugs. It was like he was made out of candy, softness and nice things.

But deep down Dark Spades knew that sometimes, he needed to play dirty. And he didn’t mind it when it was someone like Ashlynne.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frank felt like he had been through enough. Life was hard and all that but he thought he had already paid his part. Like there were no more bad things in his way. Mainly because he had gone from walking around under the sun all day, alone and starving, to having a bed he could share with the love of his life and eat three times a day. It wasn’t really going to get better than that.

There was a period of time where Gerard didn’t leave Frank for a second, and he always needed to be touching some way. Holding his hand, touching his leg with his, resting his head on his shoulder… all because he craved the physical contact and he felt like Frank was going to disappear at any time. Not that Frank was complaining, he loved always being in touch with Gerard. During that time he couldn’t stop kissing him, mainly because he didn’t really have a chance to do that after they got together.

Frank just really enjoyed kissing, even though both their lips were always dry and chapped. Gerard would be eating at the table with all the others and Frank would hold his head and give him a chaste peck on the lips, making Gee gasp and make a little squeaky sound. Everyone at the table would roll their eyes or make gagging sounds because of how disgustingly cute they were. Behind closed doors he would bite his lips and make out aggressively, hands in hair and pressed against a wall or on the bed. Other days they would cuddle up with blankets and kiss slowly, tenderly for hours.

Gerard felt like he was having a normal relationship. There was no fear of losing Frank in battle, or of him getting hurt badly after a run for supplies. Instead they smiled at each other every time they made eye contact, caressed each other with loving hands and whispered ‘I love you’ late at night. It was safe to say they were blissfully happy. They didn’t really talk about the past, about what had happened when they were apart. Sure, Frank told him about his journey through the desert with Dark Spades, but Gerard was weirdly silent about his side of the story. He didn’t even answer properly when Frank asked him why Dark Spades knew him personally; he kind of avoided it or changed the subject.

Of course, Frank wasn’t going to ruin their happiness because of something that had happened in the past and if Gerard wasn’t comfortable sharing then he wouldn’t force him to say it.

It did bother him. A lot.

They had a lot of time to spare; Ashlynne was always in her command room so every rebel was at their own devices. Frank witnesses how, slowly but steady, Gerard got better. He started gaining weight now that he was eating properly, the sick paleness was going away and he seemed to be healthier in general, and of course, happier.

One morning, Frank woke up alone. That was unexpected and got Frank wondering where Gerard had wandered off. He could go for the simple answer, he just got hungry and decided to wake up earlier or something like that but instead he became paranoid and jumped out of bed to go find him. As if destiny was playing games with him, he couldn’t find Gerard anywhere, even when he asked his friends they said they hadn’t seen him all morning. He walked up and down the hallways, until he stopped a soldier to ask him about it.

“Hey.” He said, trying not to sound so desperate. “Have you seen Gerard?”

“Who?” the soldier answered sharply.

“Party Poison?” he tried, but the guy still didn’t give him an answer, and he looked like he didn’t appreciate being bothered by this. “He’s like, this tall, messy brown hair, kind of hazel eyes…”

“Fun Ghoul, looking for the Party?” Ashlynne’s voice sounded through the hallway as she appeared almost out of nowhere.

“Where’s Gerard?” he asked, now hoping to get some answers.

“He’s in the recovery wing. I was on my way there.” She answered a smirk on her lips when he saw Frank’s expression.

“Recovery wing? Why? Did something happen to him?” he asked, now really worried Gerard had gotten hurt somehow.

“Not really, just procedure treatment.”

“What the hell are you talking about!? Treatment? What treatment? What for?”

Ashlynne fell silent for a moment, and Frank just got more worried by the second. Something was wrong with Gerard.

“You don’t know.” She whispered, and her eyes widened with surprise.

“Don’t know what!?!” Frank screamed eager for someone to tell him what the hell was going on.

“Gerard tried to kill himself a while ago.” Ashlynne explained, and Frank just froze in place. “We found him lying in the desert, alone, his wrists were slit. We took him in and placed him in rehab because of it and because he seemed to be addicted to a certain kind of pills, a lethal cocktail of antidepressants, sedatives, BL/ind pills. Pretty heavy stuff. He’s been detoxing ever since, he’s there right now.”

Frank kind of stopped listening, and his brain just keep flashing the words ‘kill himself’, ‘slit wrists’, ‘addicted’, ‘pills’. ‘Lethal’. And suddenly everything made sense, clicked into place. The mood swings, the sickness, the extreme weight loss. Him finding Gerard lying on the floor completely unconscious. He then remembered some of his last words to Gerard before getting separated. ‘We don’t have to die, not both of us’, ‘save yourself, I’ll hold them back’, ‘promise me something. You’ll carry on. You’ll keep fighting. For Mikey, for Ray. For me.’

‘Promise me, Gerard Way, that you won’t give up’

Frank didn’t say anything, but inside his heart had clenched painfully and fire started going through his veins. _He broke his promise. He lied to me_ was all he could think of. He started walking fiercely, pushing both Ashlynne and the soldier aside as he blindly went through the hallways looking for this ‘recovery wing’.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Patrick and Pete hadn’t talked to each other much since what happened, no matter how many times Pete said he was sorry and Patrick said he forgave him. There was still some tension between them, more than they would like to admit. Andy and Joe noticed this, but didn’t say anything about it. They were involved in their own ‘you gave up on Patrick’ drama anyway. It was like they were slowly drifting apart from each other, all of them being aware of it but none of them doing anything about it.

That was slowly killing them as well, the thought of them becoming strangers after all they’d been through.

Patrick was being tortured by his heart while Pete was suffering because of his head.

For Patrick, he felt all wrong. The perpetual pain in his chest every time he saw Pete was drowning him, and there was nothing he could do about it. Patrick had never been good at controlling his heart. It dominated him. Either he was too kind, or too harsh with himself. He blamed himself. He blamed himself for not loving Pete that way. Because, how easy would it be for them to just… be together. Be happy together. He was trying to feel something he didn’t when he didn’t have to. The undeserving guilt was bringing him down every day.

For Pete, the voices were back. Telling him how horrible he was. Awful. Disgusting. Guilty. Undeserving of anything good. Better off dead. Patrick made those voices go away, and now because he had ruined it with him, they were back. He believed the voices were right, he was guilty and disgusting. Better off dead, because if he was then Andy, Joe, and specially Patrick wouldn’t have that much trouble. They would be happier if he was out of the picture. He made everything worse. The voices were right, he was better off dead.

It was Patrick, the one who dared to speak up and set things straight. The hardest thing to do was look Pete in the eye when he whispered ‘we need to talk’. He saw the color drain from his face, as they walked towards a room where they could be alone. As soon as they were inside, Pete wrapped his arms around himself, making himself look smaller and staring into the ground. He thought Patrick was finally going to say everything he thought about him, and was bracing himself to take the blow he knew he deserved.

“This is not what you think, Pete, I didn’t bring you here to insult you in any way.” He started, trying to keep his hands from shaking. “We can’t keep ignoring it anymore. You need to understand that you matter so much to me, that… what happened is not going to make me want to shut you out. Please, I feel like I’m losing you, and I can’t lose you.”

Pete stayed silent. He wasn’t expecting that.

“I can’t look at you, Patrick. Not after what I did.” He muttered

“Not even when I’m asking you to?” Patrick pleaded, and his heart sank when Pete shook his head no. “How do you think I feel? Why can’t I have my best friend back?”

“Because he fell in love with you.”

An awkward silence followed. Patrick had planned to make this rational, but now he was about to start screaming and crying because of how hurt he felt. Not because of what Pete had done, but because he didn’t know how to fix it.

“I can’t begin to imagine what if must be like for you, to feel that way again after Mikey. I can’t bring myself to love after Elisa. And I’m sorry.”

“You said once you love someone that much and lose them to battle you never love anyone again.” Pete muttered, ignoring Patrick´s last statement. “So how come now I love you?”

Patrick was stung by those three words, three beautiful words that now meant pain for both of them.

“Maybe I was wrong.” He admitted, even though that didn’t make Pete feel better. “I need you to listen to me, Pete. You’re my best friend. I would die for you. And… there’s no other way to say how much you mean to me than… I love you. The thing is I am not attracted to you… sexually.”

“Are you saying that that’s the only thing holding you back?” Pete asked, confused. “That you don’t like men?”

“I don’t know if I’m bi. I don’t think I am. But… that doesn’t change what I feel for you.”

“So if I had boobs you would date me?” he asked, and Patrick squirmed internally. This was so much harder than he thought it would be.

“Yeah, basically. What I’m trying to say here is that… maybe we can work this out.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can’t kiss you in the mouth.” He said, and took the courage to say the next few phrases. “But I can hold your hand. I can’t give you my body, but I can share a bed with you at night. We wouldn’t be friends… it would be more than that. But we wouldn’t be boyfriends… it would be less than that. I know this probably doesn’t make any sense, it is weird and….”

“Different.” Pete completed, making Patrick look up to him, something he was too afraid to do.

“Yes, it would be different.”

“I like different.” Pete said, and for the first time in weeks, he genuinely smiled. Patrick returned that smile and closed the space between them, wrapping his short arms around him. After a moment, Pete hugged him back and pressed his cheek against the top of his head.

“I just need you to promise me something.” Patrick said, still in Pete’s arms. “If anyone comes around, and you have feelings for them, then you give them a chance. I don’t want… this to interfere between you and someone who can give you what I can’t”

“I don’t think that is gonna happen, but okay, I promise. Only if you promise to do the same.”

“It’s a deal then.”

The hole in Pete’s chest started to slowly close up, fill up with Patrick. Not a friend, not a boyfriend, just Patrick. And for him, that was enough. He respected Patrick and wouldn’t force him to do anything he didn’t want to, so Patrick had the reins in this kind of relationship and he set the rules and Pete played by them. He had learned his lesson, and was willing to make this, whatever it was, work.

It wasn’t the only thing Patrick had to say. He explained in detail how he didn’t trust Ashlynne or S.I.G.H.T for that matter, and that he thought there was something more behind doors, something dangerous that Ashlynne was hiding from them. He told him about Brendon. Pete just nodded, taking in all this information that was just the opposite of what everyone thought.

“I know it sounds crazy.” Patrick said, biting his lip. “But I need you to side with me.”

It did sound crazy. But this was _Patrick_. If anyone on this ship could be trusted, it was him.

“I will always side with you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After talking to Bachelor, Dark Spades decided he couldn’t just sit with his arms crossed. He needed to do something. He had heard over and over again ‘why do you care? Why do you even bother?’ well, _someone_ had to care, that someone was him. He didn’t know exactly what his goal was, but he knew there was something fishy going on. He needed to find people that he could trust, and that was a little hard.

He knew he could persuade everyone, but he didn’t want to do that. It would be using his power without being sure if he was right. So he went for the one person he didn’t use his powers on.

Crimson Clovers.

His relationship with his brother was quite different from the bond he had with Winged Hearts. Hearts was just a child, someone he had to protect, love, and more than having to be a brother, he had to be a parent. Crimson Clovers wasn’t that older, but he had matured early. He had to. He was just sixteen but he had become his brother’s partner. Dark Spades didn’t need to babysit Clovers as much, but he still had a kind of authority over him. He wasn’t a parent to him, just a big brother that sometimes bossed him around.

Dark Spades knew he could trust him.

He trusted his brother so much he didn’t use his powers on him, or on Hearts. They were family; there was no need to use such thing on family. The family he had fought through hell to keep safe and going. As for his drug problem, he had learned to control himself very well over the years. He wasn’t entirely clean, but he was getting there and fast. Dark Spades trusted him to be his own person despite his young age.

He told him about everything, and the boy just agreed. Clovers was aware his brother tended to be always right; something that could get annoying but now it was useful. It could even save their lives.

“I’m off her radar.” Clovers said, in a very low voice in case there were microphones. “She doesn’t think I’m a threat of any kind, for her I’m just another boy on the ship. You take care of Hearts and act as normally as possible; I’ll see what I can find about this whole thing.”

“Are you sure?” he asked, using that concerned big brother voice.

“Yes, I’ll be undercover. I’ll be Sherlock Holmes and solve this.”

“I’ve never doubted how intelligent you are.” He smiled. “But please, be careful.”

“When am I not careful?”

Dark Spades chuckled and was about to say something, before Clovers stopped him with a gesture and just muttered:

“Don’t answer that.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While Clovers was in investigating duties, Dark Spades was going to go talk to Phoenix. He saw something special in him; he was different from the rest of the rebels. He could tell exactly how good-hearted Phoenix was, how we was kind yet protective. Dark Spades needed people like that. Hell, the world needed people like that. He also noticed that Phoenix wasn’t so fond of S.I.G.H.T like the others; he questioned Ashlynne a lot and never let her go near his group. If he thought Ashlynne was a threat to his brothers, then he had to know that something was not right in the picture that seemed to be perfect. Dark Spades had never talked to Phoenix, and he was a little nervous, there were so many ways that could go wrong. But when he finally got him all alone in a room he was sure didn’t have any microphones, he spoke fluently and Phoenix listened, his eyes lighting up as he saw he wasn’t the only one who didn’t trust S.I.G.H.T and all its gifts.

They connected almost instantly, Dark Spade’s eyes staying their natural deep blue color, and Patrick not having to hide anything.

Believer barged into the room at one point, and gave them a look that just irradiated jealousy. Dark Spades did not know there was something between Phoenix and Believer, and he went red as his stomach twisted. Fortunately there was a very good explanation to the situation.

“It’s okay, he’s with us too.” Phoenix said, and Dark Spades let out a sigh of relief.

They were there, the little army of three that was planning to overthrow a whole industry.

It was little, but it was something. And Ashlynne had no idea what was coming for her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Asking Ashlynne to take him to the recovery wing would’ve been way easier. Now Frank was angrily going through hallways that seemed to be all the same waiting and half-hoping he would stumble upon a huge sing that read “recovery wing, Gerard Way is in this room.”

But it wasn’t like the airship was huge enough for Frank to get lost for hours. He finally found a glass door that lead to even more halls, but on top of it there was the sign he was looking for. He opened the doors harshly and walked down the path, poking his head in every room there was, until he reached the one that had Gerard in it.

He was sitting on a gurney and looked quite sad, holding the inside of his arm as if the nurses had just drawn blood from him. To test how intoxicated he was. Frank didn’t make a sound, he stood there in the frame of the door and it took Gerard a minute to notice his presence. And when he did, he blinked a couple times like a deer caught in the headlights and opened his mouth to say something but couldn’t because Frank had crossed the room and slapped him hard in the face.

The sharp noise bounced off the walls, and then the room went completely silent, the only sound being the little whimper Gerard let out as he touched his cheek in disbelief. His eyes filled with tears when he was met with Frank’s stone-cold expression, no sign of compassion in his eyes. Frank had never hurt him physically, and now there was a sharp pain in his skin.

“F-Frank?” he stuttered, hurt and confused.

“How dare you.” was all Frank said, in a voice Gerard had never heard before. Full of anger. “How dare you try to do this.”

He grabbed his wrist and squeezed it so hard Gerard cried out of pain, but it hurt more to see Frank showing him the thick, ugly scar that ran across it. His breath hitched with sobbing and he started shaking in fear, in fear of what Frank might do to him.

“I practically died for you!” Frank shouted, making Gerard flinch. “And you go and do this?! What the hell is wrong with you, Gerard!! You were supposed to keep fighting, but instead you gave up. You failed me! YOU FAILED ALL OF US!”

“Stop…” he begged, but Frank was so lost in his rage he didn’t listen.

“How long have you been addicted?” He asked, clenching his teeth, fuming.

“I-I…” Gerard tried to speak, but the words got caught in his throat.

“ANSWER ME!” Frank yelled, making Gerard cry harder.

“Months! I don’t know!” Gerard screamed back, but his voice was full of fear.

“Is this what you’ve been taking? Fucking BL/ind pills?!” he had a little bottle with BL/ind’s happy face on it, which used to be on a little table beside the gurney but now Frank had thrown it across the room and the little white specks were scattered through the floor. “And you didn’t tell me anything. You lied to me when I asked if you were fine, when in reality you were getting high and passing out on the fucking floor when everyone else was fighting to keep it together!! What the fuck were you thinking!?!?”

“I couldn’t take the pain anymore, okay?! It was too much for me I needed it to survive!!” Gerard cried, looking at Frank with pleading eyes full of tears.

“You were poisoning yourself!!” he answered, and Gerard was sure someone had to notice all the yelling and would come into the room to see what was going on. He prayed for it. “You became what you said you would never be. I thought you were done with all this drug bullshit you had when you were younger. I thought I could trust you!!”

Frank was insanely close to his face, Gerard could feel his hot breath and he was sure Frank could feel how hard he was shaking.

“Mikey and Ray would be disgusted. I am disgusted.” He spat, and Gerard felt a cold blade pierce his heart, and the pain was so intense he gasped and pressed his chest as if he had been shot and had to hold the wound to not bleed out.

Frank just walked away from him, stepping out of the room and slamming the door behind him, leaving Gerard alone. The room felt incredibly weird now that it was silent, except for Gerard gasping for breath. His vision went in and out of focus, and he barely felt a thing when he fell out of the gurney and his body crashed into the floor, where he curled up and clawed at his chest, trying to make the pain stop. 

It didn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! here's a new chapter. I hope you're enjoying this story as much as I enjoy writing it ;)  
> Have a really nice week! <3


	8. I Don't Want To Die...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank made a mistake.  
> It just took him a little while to notice.
> 
> Ironically enough, Dark Spade doesn't trust many people. But he knows that his brother can be trusted with this job.
> 
> Meanwhile, Gerard is shown something that completely changes his perspective about himself, about what really is inside him and what he can do.

Frank was really explosive. It helped him survive sometimes, Gee had even called him a small killing machine full of rage. Right now he felt just like that, a small killing machine full of rage. And he needed to get it out somehow. He had stormed out of Gerard’s room without looking back and ignoring the loud thud that sounded behind him. He ran up and down the hallways like a maniac until he was breathing heavily and getting tired, his legs screaming for him to stop. He had gained some resistance over the years, so to get him to the point where he was out of breath took him a while.

But he was finally there, that moment when his legs felt like jelly and couldn’t carry him anymore. When his lungs were hurting and pleading for air, making him breathe in faster and deeper as if he was drowning. That moment when his heart was pounding so loud he felt it in his ears and all over his skin. He walked all the way back to the recovery wing only to find Gerard’s door closed. Not that he expected it to be open after what had happened. He leaned on the door and let himself fall down slowly, closing his eyes and calming down.

It had been two days since he had found out about everything. Two days in which Gerard hadn’t showed up for any meals. Two nights, in which Frank barely slept, staring at the empty space besides him.

Focusing on breathing helped clear his mind, get some needed oxygen up there. Frank started going through his actions and analyzing them carefully, something he hadn’t done in that moment. He had ran up to Gerard who was in rehab, slapped him hard across the face, yelled at him, screamed how disgusted and disappointed he was, mentioned Mikey and Ray in a way he shouldn’t have and walked out leaving Gerard all alone and crying. Now that he thought about it, it sounded absolutely horrible. Gerard’s words were floating on his mind, repeating nonstop, ‘I couldn’t take the pain anymore, okay?! It was too much for me I needed it to survive!!’

Gerard couldn’t take the pain of losing Mikey and Ray so he had started taking pills to feel numb.

He needed them, otherwise he would have broken down and probably died soon after his brother and comrade did.

“ _and where were you, Frank?_ ” a little voice in his head whispered.

Where was I?

Frank had left Gerard alone. Alone with his pain, his thoughts. He couldn’t exactly blame himself for this, but he couldn’t blame Gerard entirely either. Sometimes we all do crazy things to stop the pain. Gerard fell into drugs because he was miserable.

Frank was the only one he had left, and practically sacrificed himself for him.

Gerard thought Frank was dead. That he was alone and that’s why he tried to end his life soon after. Because he felt it wasn’t worth it anymore? Maybe it was too much? Frank had never thought about it that way, and when he put himself into Gerard’s place, he realized how awful he had been. How badly he had reacted to the whole situation. You don’t yell at someone who had lost everything and everyone and was suicidal because of it. You sure as hell don’t slap them.

“Oh God.” Frank whispered to himself, feeling like a monster. “Gerard?”

Nothing. Complete silence.

“Gee?” he called out again, but no one answered. Maybe Gerard didn’t want to see him, and that would be completely understandable. “I hope you’re in there, I hope you’re okay.”

That sounded so pathetic, but despite everything, Frank didn’t want to lose Gerard. So he kept going.

“I want you to be okay. I have to admit, I didn’t think about what it was like for you… to be all alone. And I’m sorry it had to be that way. I… saw something, you know? They shot me, square in the chest. All I wanted was for you to be safe. I thought I was going to die but… I saw something; I don’t really know what it was. It was all black and white, gloomy. There was… a parade. I was in it, and you were in it. Mikey and Ray were there too. But all different, Mikey had his brown hair, mine was cut short. You had short white hair. This people… they called me, told me to join them and march to the end, offered me a medal. White-haired you told me you would get a medal too, soon. I think now I understand. I don’t know why I’m telling you all this, but I’m glad you didn’t take that medal. Sure, you tried, but you didn’t. I didn’t either. Because I realized you were out there and I couldn’t die just yet, that I had to find you. Now would I have done that if I thought you were disgusting and not worth it?”

Frank really hoped Gerard was listening, but there was no sign of it whatsoever.

“I’m really sorry, Gee.” Frank cried, overwhelmed by the thought that maybe he had ruined things forever. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you, I shouldn’t have hit you. I feel horrible, I’m so, so sorry. I shouldn’t have said any of the things I said. You don’t disgust me, you’re amazing. I… I love you, Gee, please I don’t want to lose you because I was a huge asshole, please… please let me in…”

“It’s open.” A little broken voice came from the other side of the door, and Frank took a moment to just admire the fact that he didn’t even try to open the door and realize it didn’t have a lock. He stood up and took a deep breath, pushing it open and meeting with a Gerard that was lying down in the gurney, looking small with his back turned to him.

Frank slowly approached him and placed a hand on his shoulder, making him roll over to face him. His eyes were red and puffy, staring into nothing, but the most painful thing to see was the purplish bruise forming on his cheek. Frank felt sick.

“Hey.” Frank whispered, caressing his head gently.

“I get why you’re mad.” Gee said, his voice feeble.

“I’m not mad anymore.” Frank added quickly. “I’m worried; did it all turn out okay?”

Gerard hesitated for a moment and bit his lower lip, before answering:

“I’m clean.”

“Oh thank God.” The words slipped out of his mouth, so Frank just went with it. “Please forgive me, Gee. I love you too much to let you go.”

Gerard sat up on the gurney just looked at Frank with his big, sad eyes. Very slowly, Frank wrapped his arms around his frame and pulled him close to him, resting his head on his chest and listening to his steady heartbeat. Frank felt Gerard press a soft kiss to his head, and it made a small tear fall down his cheek.

 _I don’t deserve him. He’s too good for me._ He thought.

“I love you too, Frankie.” Gerard whispered, his voice rough against his throat. “I’m sorry, about everything.”

“Hey, it’s all in the past now, okay?” Frank cupped his face and stared into his eyes, blinking away some tears. “I will never hurt you like that again, you hear me? I promise.”

Gerard didn’t care about his face, bruises fade anyway. Seeing it was enough torture for Frank already, he could tell. But he didn’t want to fight, he was too tired. So instead he kissed Frank’s lips softly, breathing him in and feeling safe between his arms.

“I’m tired of sleeping alone.” Frank muttered. “Please come back?”

For the first time, Gerard smiled. A sideways grin that lit up his face a little bit. He had also had a rough time sleeping alone, in the gurney since he was too afraid to go out of the room. So he would gladly go back to sleeping with Frank, the little guy he could wrap his whole body around to keep warm. The little guy who would wake up with messy long hair, smiling at him with a loving glare. He wanted to see that again.

And now he would.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crimson Clovers knew he was the smart one in the family. Dark Spades was the protector, and Winged Hearts was the loving. He didn’t show that much emotion, he was reserved and often came across as cold. But that was just because his mind was busy with other things rather than feelings. He enjoyed solving problems that required logical thinking, so he took this little mission as a big, complicated mystery puzzle.

He noticed how Ashlynne was keeping an eye on everyone but him and Hearts. She thought of them as children who were harmless. He used that to his advantage to get information out of some soldiers, the ones he saw tended to question her or disagree with her orders while carrying them out anyway.

He wasn’t as good with people as his brother, no one was. But he did teach him some tricks to get people to talk. With these kind of oppressed soldiers, the best way to earn their trust and get them to spill was to show them you were on their side. That you agreed with them, even if their opinion couldn’t be public. What started out as simple gossip about the boss, became really useful to Clovers.

He found out the majority of her armed forces in fact, didn’t trust her. They often disagreed with her judgment and courses of action, and even told Clovers that she had a special team that wasn’t allowed to say what they did. These were really loyal soldiers that only received direct orders and no one had seen them doing their job. Clovers assumed this ‘special team’ could only be doing ‘special tasks’ that couldn’t be known by the rest of the crew.

Even though his brother believed in ‘every person is different’ and whatnot, Clovers believed all people followed patterns. And working with those patterns was the key to solving the puzzle. Ashlynne was a leader, someone who had a public image and needed to keep it clean and perfect. She knew that. It was highly unlikely that Ashlynne didn’t know about what happened to Bachelor, she knew everything going on in the ship. And why else would she want Bachelor not to tell anyone what she did to Josh? Used him as an object, a bridge to get to Tyler, and not Tyler per se, but his power. Because if everyone knew that, they would start to question her authority.

Still, it wasn’t enough for Clovers. He was close, very close, but he needed to take that final step and finally go tell his brother to start his action plan.

That final step was behind a door that said ‘authorized personal only’

It was incredibly late at night, 2:59 am to be exact. Clover was crouching besides the door that led to Ashlynne’s command room. He had calculated the camera’s blinds spots, and he really trusted his numbers to be perfect so he could walk through without being seen. It had worked until that point. He knew the command room was going to be empty, Ashlynne would be sleeping and the ship was in autopilot.

Ever since he went into that ship he discovered that there was so much more to numbers than he thought. He analyzed the computers there, and with some help from a kind worker he started to understand code. Dark Spades was amazed at his ability to learn so quickly and Clovers felt like he had a place to be. He had always been in his brother’s shadow, following his orders, but knowing something not everybody could do made him feel special. Dark Spades realized his brother was a young adult, who had found purpose.

He learned how the whole system worked, and because his mentor kind of cared for him a lot, he taught him how to break passwords when he asked him to. Clovers knew what to do; he just needed a little push forward.

Taking a deep breath, he sprinted towards the door and opened it, shutting it at his back. He took a few seconds to marvel at the controls of that huge ship, and felt peaceful among the screens and buttons, the soft beeping sounds and the dim lights in the panels. He walked up to the main monitor and started it, the bright screen greeting him and asking for a password.

He started to work his magic, his fingers flying across the keyboard, his mind being calmed by the soft thud sound the keys made when he pressed them. He hit enter and when he looked up, it was open. He smiled a little to himself before starting to look for something with the label ‘plans’ or something like that. The folders were all named in a way he didn’t understand, but then again it wasn’t like he was going to find a folder named ‘super-secret evil plans’.

He opened them all and was greeted with a lot of documents, and he felt a little tingle of fear in his gut because he didn’t have that much time. So he searched a date, hoping the system had some kind of report, and it did. A daily report for what it looked like decades back. Clovers started opening some of them and going through the pages as fast as he could, processing the information with key words he could remember. As he kept going through the document, he felt his hands starting to shake and his blood ran cold.

His brother was right.

What he saw in those pages scared the hell out of him, like he was reading a horror story. What that woman had done…

Suddenly, the lights turned on and blinded him for a moment, making him jump. Clovers turned around to see Ashlynne with one hand on the light switch. The air left his lungs painfully as he started to look for a way out, but he felt completely trapped.

“Oh, Crimson Clovers…” Ashlynne started saying, her voice echoing through the room. “Such a smart guy, it is a shame you’re throwing it all away like this.”

He swallowed hard and tried to calm down, but his brain was panicking and urging him to run. But what could he do? If he hit Ashlynne and ran out, she would certainly come after him. There was no way he was getting out without consequences. What would she do to him? Torture him like she did with Bachelor? Or use him in another sick way?

“You’re always doing what your brother says, don’t you have a mind of your own?” she asked. “He tricked you, with his magical eyes, made you think it was all a game for you to solve so you would do his dirty work.”

She was trying to make him turn against Dark Spades?

“He doesn’t trick me with his eyes.” Clovers answered, his teeth clenched in sudden anger. “I’m family to him.”

“Family.” She repeated, as if it was an odd word. “You do really stupid shit for family and end up in bad situations. Just like right now. Trust me, kid. Family always ends in pain, blood, or tears.”

Clovers wasn’t so helpless, he knew how to fight. And he would fight Ashlynne if he had to. Even if she looked delicate and skinny, he had learned not to patronize anyone. She just laughed at his tensed position.

“I’ll make a deal with you.” She continued. “I’ll let you get out of this room unharmed, but I’ll confront your brother instead.”

He knew what ‘confronting’ meant. And he was not letting her get to his brother.

“As if I would do something like that.” He growled, and Ashlynne looked like she pitied him for a moment.

“Protecting someone always gets you killed.” She stated, and Clovers saw a shiny blade appear in her hand. He didn’t have any weapon on him, so he balled his fists, his heart going crazy in his chest.

Ashlynne was fast, in the blink of an eye she had her hand wrapped around Clovers’ neck. Something happened to him when she touched him. He felt a bolt of energy go through his body, making him shiver and he didn’t know why. Ashlynne squeezed his throat and held him up, so that his feet where dangling off the ground. Clovers started punching her arm in hopes of getting her to let go, but his head started to get fuzzy and he got weaker and weaker.

Just as Ashlynne was smiling to herself and Clovers’ eyes were starting to close, he landed a decent kick in her stomach which made her loose her grip and Clovers managed to wiggle free. He took deep breaths and stepped back quickly, watching as Ashlynne started to rise to her feet again. Before she could stand up completely, Clovers kicked her in the head and Ashlynne collapsed on the floor with a grunt.

There was no time to stand by and see how things turned out, Clovers ran out of the room and sprinted down the hallway, not caring about cameras anymore.

He was just about to get out when a door slammed shut in front of him, blocking his path. He stopped harshly and ran back, looking for another door that would lead him to freedom but soon realized he was trapped. Completely panicking now, he banged on the door but knew deep down there was no one to hear him. Suddenly, Ashlynne was pinning him against the wall and holding the blade to his neck.

“You think you’re so smart, you little shit.” She whispered sharply. “You thought you could learn some code and come into my room to try and reveal all my dirty secrets? You thought I didn’t care about what you did, that you were so goddamn invisible I wouldn’t notice? I am the leader here, I am in charge. You must think I’m dumb if you expected all my files to only be under one, easily-hacked password. I knew what you were doing from the very start. But I dragged you along, brought you here so no one can save you. Not even your beloved brother.”

She stabbed him, hard and fast in the chest. Clovers screamed out, more out of panic than pain. Blood starting flowing out of the wound and soaking his shirt, while Ashlynne stabbed him violently a few more times. She let him slide down, leaving a red stain on the wall and trail all the way down to the floor. He struggled to breathe and just watched Ashlynne’s heels walking away from him.

Tears of fear started rolling down his cheeks as he tried to stop the bleeding even though he knew it was useless. If Crimson Clovers was afraid of something in this world, it was death. The thought of dying terrified him, and now he was bleeding out on the floor and losing consciousness quickly, alone in an empty hallway.

“Andrew…” he cried, sobs hitching his voice. “Andrew, brother… please… help me please…”

He shouted his brother’s name, pleading that he would come, take the fear away with his eyes, and heal his wounds. He wanted to be a little kid again, when Andrew would tuck him in, tell him stories and kiss his head.

“I don’t want to die, Andrew…”Clovers begged. “I’m scared….”

He felt himself slipping into a dark place, a dark place that promised to swallow him whole and wipe his memory off this Earth. He was terrified, of what could come next. He screamed, cried and begged.

But nobody came.

He didn’t suffer for much longer. His body went limp, and his cries stopped. He lied there, in a pool of blood that wouldn’t be there in the morning, the hall in complete and morbid silence.

And just like that, Crimson Clovers was no longer scared, the light behind his eyes faded, and his hurt and aching heart came to a stop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just after he and Frank had solved their issues, Gerard had finally left the room to actually go and talk to his friends. He found out everyone was worried about him, and were glad he was okay. That made him feel warm and fuzzy inside. The rebels were sitting at the dinner table munching on some food and talking about random stuff, something they didn’t get to do out there in the desert.

Suddenly, Gerard noticed Ashlynne standing not so far from them, and when she saw him staring, she said:

“Gerard, would you please come with me for a second?”

Even thought it sounded like a question, Gerard instantly knew he didn’t have a choice. Frank squeezed his hand gently and gave him a look that clearly said ‘stay’. Gerard just kissed his forehead and whispered a small ‘I’ll be back, promise’ before standing up and walking with Ashlynne, leaving Frank at the table, distressed. Ashlynne didn’t say a word as they walked down the hallways, and Gerard had a feeling it wasn’t something good.

Finally, they stopped in front of a door that read ‘projection room’. Gerard had never been to that part of the ship, and honestly he was getting kind of scared. Ashlynne just kept smiling and led him into the room, which had a high ceiling and nothing in it. No furniture, no screens, just plain white walls.

“What are we doing here?” Gerard dared to ask, and when he turned around to face her, he realized she was inside a little cabin to the side, staring at him through the glass. He felt trapped, and his blood started rushing through his veins, making his skin feel hot and his face to blush.

“Relax, Gerard, there’s no need to be scared.” Ashlynne’s voice said through a microphone. “I just wanted to show you something.”

Ashlynne activated something from that little cabin and Gerard started hearing a low buzz, like a machine loading up and then exploding with a strong sound wave that knocked him off his feet. He landed on his butt and covered his eyes with his hands, scared something would hurt him. He was disoriented, confused, and didn’t know what the hell was happening or why Ashlynne had brought him there. After some moments of tense silence, Gerard opened his eyes and saw the room had changed completely.

The walls that were once white now were covered in bright colors. There was a mess of purple mixed with orange and white, and a dark figure hanging upside down. Then the colors turned to black with angry splashes of red across two people facing each other; to then fade into a light grey with slashes of black and a little skeleton marcher; and finally to all come together into a landscape, the yellowish sand littered with dead bushes, dark grey mountains and a blue sky with a blur of bright pink.

Gerard stared in awe at all the… art splattered through the walls, and noticed things about them that moved. A little white spider with a bolt of lightning on its abdomen, the little marcher he had seen earlier moved around too, with more small black creatures behind him. The faces of the man and woman didn’t move, but their mouths twitched slightly as if they wanted to lean in and kiss each other despite the expression of despair on them. The hanging man swung from side to side gently.

There were words scattered across all these pictures, but Gerard couldn’t read them. The letters were far too blurry to make them up. Gerard felt strangely confused, but amazed and astonished at the display all around him.

The mix of dark and bright all in a beautiful cloud brought Gerard a feeling quite unknown to him. Peace.

“What’s all this?” he managed to ask, but felt like he really didn’t care what it was or where it came from.

“This is you.” Ashlynne said, and Gerard could hear her smile. “This is what you are.”

What I am?

He thought Ashlynne was lying. How can something so gorgeous be… him? That didn’t make any sense to Gerard, but as if that world could hear his doubt, yet another figured appeared in front of him. This was more human-like, and when it focused completely, Gerard gasped and covered his mouth.

The person had fiery red-orange hair, and his skin had a really nice creamy color. Behind him there was a pink fluffy cat-like creature with a big smile and tiny eyes. The guy was wearing a blue suit with a red tie, and there was a ring on his finger. He had deep hazel, kind of amber eyes, and he blinked a couple times.

It was him.

Somehow, different, but it was Gerard. The other Gerard seemed to recognize him, and just gave him a sweet smile. He raised a finger and starting writing something in the air, white letters appearing in front of him in what Gerard recognized as his own handwriting.

_Don’t worry, you’ll be okay._

Soon after that he vanished, leaving Gerard with an odd feeling in his heart. As if he had received that little message from his future self. Deep down he knew it was that way.

“Now you believe me?” Ashlynne continued. “This is all that’s inside you, what you did in another time and what you are destined to become. All of it exists at the same time, in the same space. This micro-universe you hold inside you is all your creation. Your legacy.”

“I-I… I can create all this?” he stuttered. Everything was just so… deep and meaningful, detailed, sometimes overwhelming in the best way. He looked down at his hands, rough and scarred, and wondered how could he make all that with them.

“It’s not your hands, Gerard. It’s your mind, your voice.”

“How can you know all this?”

“You’re art, Gee.” She said, and Gerard jumped a little bit at the sound of his nickname, something Ashlynne had never used. “You just couldn’t see it, artists are often like that. You just need a little push, someone to uncover your eyes and show you exactly what you can do.”

Gerard felt something inside him, a beat, and a hum, something he couldn’t quite explain. A chill in his bones, a tingly feeling in his throat. He saw with sparkly eyes how the little creatures came together and kind of looked at him, even if some of them didn’t have any eyes. That’s when Gerard felt like that was his creation.

Words starting forming over them, a simple phrase that resonated inside his head, said by Frank, Mikey, Ray and other million voices.

_Art is your weapon. Use it._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frank couldn’t chill after Gerard had left the table. He was nervously tapping his foot under the table, his fingers fiddling with a strand of his coal-black hair. The nice conversation suddenly stopped to look at him, everyone at the table feeling a little sorry for him. They were all worried about Gerard, and they understood Frank wanted to always be by his side making sure he was okay.

“Dude, just go with him.” Believer chimed. His arm was around Phoenix shoulders, and the blond guy didn’t seem to mind. They didn’t give anyone any explanations, and that was okay. Everyone kind of thought they were soul mates, but not exactly in a romantic way.

“Yeah, may I remind you, you were absolutely miserable without him, so you better go and get your man.” Serpent said, chewing on a cereal bar.

“I don’t know where they went.” Frank mumbled softly.

“You’re Party Poison’s boyfriend.” Believer said, as if that was a huge title to have. “Don’t you have like a sixth sense that leads you to him? I mean, you guys keep getting separated and you somehow manage to find each other.”

“That’s true.” Phoenix whispered, feeling it wasn’t really his place to say anything. As usual.

Frank just thought what the hell, if he managed to find Gerard in the recovery room, he could find him again. He ignored the half-cheers he heard from the table as he stood up and walked off into the hallway Ashlynne and Gerard had disappeared into.

He didn’t wander that far until he reached a plain white room, where Gerard was sitting on the floor… giggling?

Frank didn’t enter the room; instead he went into a little cabin to the side where he could see Gerard through the glass. His lover was sitting on the floor near one of the walls, and was smiling fondly, looking at the white surface as if the most beautiful piece of art was painted on it. He was also giggling, and running his fingers gently on the surface.

What the hell was he doing?

“Gee?” he asked, and he didn’t think he would hear him. Gerard turned his head to see him and his eyes lit up with joy as he made signs for Frank to come in.

Hesitating a little bit, Frank walked into the room and suddenly felt an energy wave hit him so hard he almost fell.

“Come here, Frank!” Gerard chirped, his voice revealing how happy he was. “Look at all this! Isn’t it beautiful? And the best part is that it’s all mine! I created all this!”

Frank was completely silent. Gerard saw him staring with big eyes at the wall.

“Frank?” Gerard asked, getting up and walking to his side. “What do you see?”

“Nothing.” He mumbled, and Gerard felt like he was lying.

“You can’t see what I’m talking about? The colors… the creatures?”

“Not really…”

Gerard had a sinking feeling in his gut; it made him sad that Frank couldn’t see all the things that made him so happy. But when he reasoned it a little, he concluded everyone saw something different. If that whole universe was Gerard’s, then Frank had to have one of his own.

“That’s okay, maybe only I can see them. And you see something different, when the machine works on you.” Gerard said, sighing. “I swear I’m not crazy.”

“I believe you.” Frank said with a smile, taking Gerard’s hand and caressing his skin with his thumb. “Let’s just go.”

Gerard smiled back, and they both walked back to the table, hand in hand.

What Frank didn’t tell Gerard was that he did see something different in the projection room. That the machine was indeed working on him when he walked in.

He was himself. Hair cut short and leaning on something that looked like some kind of pole with a microphone on the end. He was wearing all white clothes with a black tie and there was a guitar strapped to his chest. He was covered in blood. Angry crimson liquid bathed him, staining his clothes, his guitar, and his face.

The disturbing thing about the whole scene wasn’t the blood.

It was that he was smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys!  
> hope you're having an amazing weekend  
> I absolutely love reading your comments, thank you so much <3


	9. Deeply Afraid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler hasn't been the same, that's no secret to anyone. But now he's faced with a decision that will completely change his life... and Josh's
> 
> Something is boiling inside the ship's walls, showing the world that even with S.I.G.H.T, rebels are still rebels and cannot be bossed around like soldiers. But some loyalties will be questioned in the process. 
> 
> Ashlynne can only keep a secret for so long... before big brother finds out.

Tyler had always been kind of a loner. Always lost inside his head, his body wandering around but his eyes glassy and clearly somewhere else. Some people thought he was some kind of ghost, or at least that he was possessed by one. He didn’t talk, and people would bump into him and Tyler wouldn’t even flinch. He was a weird kid, walking up and down the dark streets of Battery City way pass curfew.

Funny, how that was how he met Josh.

Josh was this energetic kid that had a smile on his face almost at all times, and was known for doing crazy shit like back flipping off things. It was like; he had that kind of rebel spirit on him, and always went against the rules. Tyler thought he was pretty cool.

One time, on one of Tyler’s late night walks, he found Josh lying on the floor, huffing slightly. He was baffled by this; no one should be out at that time. But Josh was, and when he saw Tyler approach, he thought it was a guard and that he was done for. Except it wasn’t a guard, it was the little shy kid with glassy eyes.

“Hey” he had said, his voice a little drowned by pain.

“…Hey” Tyler had whispered, so softly Josh barely heard him. Tyler remembers seeing Josh smiling at him.

“I kind of… sprained by ankle.” Josh had admitted, sitting up slowly. “I landed badly, knocked some trash cans.”

“Do you need any help?” Tyler asked. He remembers being dizzy, his gut twisting around with his awkwardness. Even if he was shy, he wasn’t letting a guy on the floor for the guards to find.

“That would be really nice, yeah.” He said, and Tyler proceeded to lift him up and walked with him while he jumped on one leg, listening to the instructions Josh gave him to find his house.

They didn’t talk at all.

“Dude, thank you. You totally saved me.” Josh said when Tyler left him in front of his door.

“Are you going to be okay?” he had asked, just out of politeness but still feeling a little worried about the guy.

“Yeah, I break bones all the time.” He laughed as if it wasn’t a big deal. “This doesn’t look so bad, but crawling home would have been a nightmare. Anyway, what were you doing out?”

“…Thinking.” Tyler answered, feeling his face heating up.

“Do you think a lot?” Josh asked, holding onto the frame of the door.

“Yes.”

“I think a lot too.” He murmured. His eyes suddenly weren’t so sparkly anymore. “My name’s Josh by the way.”

“Tyler.”

“Well goodnight, Tyler. I hope we meet again. When we’re both out to think.”

.

That memory had been embedded into Tyler’s brain since forever. Now it was kind of hazy, some things about it seemed off. Maybe it was because Tyler didn’t feel like himself anymore. He felt like some kind of vessel, that inside him there wasn’t a ‘warm being’ as Josh would say, there was just… Blurryface’s power. It was his to use, but he was slowly becoming the power itself. Becoming less and less human and more and more a force.

It wasn’t the first time Tyler had to find a way to cope, but this time was different and definitely harder. He went back to the time he was in the padded cell, alone with a freak. What had helped him stay sane back then? The lyrics, the sound, the songs, the music.

His music. His purpose.

That was why Tyler Joseph was slowly fading. He didn’t remember any of the words he had committed to memory and sang over and over again. It was like they were stored in the back of his head, and no matter how hard he tried, he could never reach them. And it was driving him insane. The sick, disturbing power inside him was too much, consuming him slowly.

He didn’t really sleep anymore, just closed his eyes and doze off a little, just to come back crying out of frustration. This would wake Josh up and make him all worried and anxious. Tyler always said it was just a nightmare, that it wasn’t real.

But it was, and it was killing him. The last thing Tyler wanted was for Josh to get hurt. So he kept the reality from him, but it always made his heart jump a little when he realized Josh _knew_ he had been different since he came out of the padded cell and he would still say he loved him regardless. He would get a fuzzy feeling in his chest, like when Josh called him cute all the way back in Battery City.

He went back to wandering in silence, this time through the stale hallways. He frequented the ones that were plain white, with no art in them. That’s how he got to the projection room, and decided to go in when he saw it was a plain white room. It didn’t last long; the walls became littered with words, pitch black words in his handwriting. But Tyler couldn’t make them out; they were all too blurry and fuzzy. Something flared inside him, frustration and anger in a mix that burned his chest and throat.

He saw colors. Green, purple, yellow, blue. Colors all making some kind of goo, that was slowly dripping on the floor like a cascade, that came from something that looked like a skull, he couldn’t really tell. Then it all turned into a scene, it looked like a sandy ground with houses on the background, and figures standing there with blue and red shirts. It all then faded into light grey and white, with two tall men standing there. He didn’t recognize either of them. And finally everything turned dark, black, red and white all scattered in dots and patterns.

It was like it was all behind a foggy glass, like there was something stopping him from seeing things clearly.

The only thing he saw clearly wasn’t on the wall. It was on the floor in front of him.

Blurryface. But he looked different. He didn’t have his usual… vibe. His blackened hands were chained together and connected to the floor; he was kneeling since the chain didn’t allow him to stand. He still had the red beanie and the floral kimono, but his face was paler and his blood red eyes were looking dull. But most importantly, there was a noose around his neck.

The end of the thick rope laid in front Tyler’s feet. His heart pounded as he stared at it.

“Hey, Joseph.” Blurry said with a smirk, though Tyler could tell he was weak. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

“What are you doing here?” he saw Blurry blink in confusion when he heard his voice, much colder and deeper.

“Well is not like I can go anywhere.” He answered, making the chains clink together. “You enjoy being in control? Not really? Is it too much?”

Surprising how even if Tyler was above him now, Blurry found a way to bother him anyway. He crouched and took the rope in his hands, giving it a pull. He heard Blurryface choke and he fell forward, hitting the ground pretty hard.

“Easy, Ty.” He complained. “You don’t have to be a dick.”

Tyler walked up to him and held the rope by the knot, Blurry’s eyes going wide when his breath was cut. His hands tried to make Tyler let go, but they had no effect on him. He could hold him there forever if he wanted to. It wouldn’t kill Blurry, it would just make him suffer. Tyler’s arms were firm and unbolting, but his chest had a weird pressure that made his lungs hurt with every breath.

“Let go.” Blurryface choked, almost pleaded. “And I’ll help you… come on…”

Josh had always told him not to believe anything Blurryface said, that it was all a lie. But now, Tyler let go of him and the man fell down harshly, breathing in deeply. He fixed his beanie and sat with his legs crossed, looking up at Tyler through his eyelashes. It always bothered him that the physical embodiment of Blurryface was so similar to him.

“I know you want the lyrics.” Blurryface explained, rubbing his chains softly. “No, I know you _need_ them. And you know why you can’t read them? Because of my power. It’s blocking them.”

Blurryface’s breath hitched, seeing Tyler didn’t give any signs of understanding what that meant. He assumed he would be shocked, hurt, but instead his features were cold. The same face and the same expression he had when he walked in. That wasn’t scared little Tyler anymore, this was someone different. Blurryface didn’t like it.

“If you set me free, you can have everything you ever wanted. Your songs, your happiness. Josh.”

Tyler felt sick at the way he said his name.

“Josh?” he asked, not entirely sure what Blurryface meant.

“Come on, Joseph.” He mocked him. “I thought you were smarter than that. I’ve been inside your head, I know you’re aware of what you’re doing to Josh. You’re slowly draining him, hurting him, killing him. When will you understand that as long as you have this power, you’re not allowed to love? Love is toxic for people like us, Tyler.”

“I am not like you.” he said angrily.

“Except you are, you just don’t want to admit it. You know what happens to you when you’re with Josh. He makes you weaker. But you have no idea what he goes through. Little Josh, he hides it so well, but if you look hard enough you can see the pain in his eyes. You were built to destroy, Tyler. You’re destroying him. And you both ignore it, like it’s not there because you’re both too scared to leave each other. The only way you can have your purpose and Josh by your side, is if I’m no longer here. Set me free, judge.”

“I won’t let you hurt other people the way you hurt me.” Tyler stated.

Blurryface sighed and sat back, wearing an ironic smirk on his lips.

“Is that so? Well congratulations Tyler Joseph, you have become a martyr, doomed to drag this noose for all eternity, pulling the great red-eyed demon that has been reduced to a simple slave, the monster on a leash. You will watch all your love ones fade away with time as you remain untouched, I your only companion. I will fade away too, eventually, because Tyler Joseph will become Blurryface, and so the cycle will begin yet again. This is why you didn’t die when you shot yourself, because you’re not done on this earth and you will never be. It gave you a choice, and you still decided to stay with me. Don’t you see I’m meant to never go away, no matter how many times you scream to leave you alone? Welcome to your new purpose, Ty.”

The cycles always begin again, and this one was just a matter of time. There needs to be balance, and of course Dark Spades couldn’t go on without a counterpart. And now there is one.

Dark Spades was blessed. Tyler Joseph was cursed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Why are they here again?” Pete complained for like the eleventh time. Patrick had given up. Joe and Andy were giving him looks that clearly said ‘please control your 5’5 man-child that also happens to be your platonic soul mate because he’s driving everyone insane’.

Even though it could be exasperating sometimes, Patrick loved that playful bickering that often went on between them. It was like being young and reckless again. Now they were not so young and even more reckless so nothing had really changed much. Both Andy and Joe had embraced whatever Pete and Patrick were, and wouldn’t pressure them about it since they saw their friends were extremely happy with each other. They did notice that Patrick had become more of a mom with Pete than he already was.

“Pete, come on, this is important.” Patrick mumbled, squeezing his hip with his synthetic hand, making Pete jump at the touch of the cold metal, something he did often.

Dark Spades was cradling Hearts between his legs; Joe and Andy were sitting on the bed with Bachelor close to them, and both Pete and Patrick were standing and leaning on the wall. Maybe Pete was so grumpy and annoying because the little meeting was taking place in their bedroom, and he just wanted to lie down and cuddle.

Fun Ghoul and Party Poison were the last ones to come into the room, holding hands and with what was clearly sex hair. Dark Spades smirked and moved over so they could sit. Pete just rolled his eyes and Patrick felt a little hurt. It wasn’t like he didn’t notice Pete having wet dreams all the time.

“Sorry to have interrupted your activities.” Dark Spades voice snapped him out of his thoughts. “But this is something important, that concerns all of us. For those who don’t know me personally, my name’s Dark Spades, and I believe something bad is going on behind Ashlynne’s closed doors.”

There were different reactions. Andy tilted his head to the side while Joe frowned at him. Ghoul looked a little shocked, but didn’t seem so skeptical. Maybe because he was the one who knew Dark Spades the best and knew he wouldn’t lie about anything. Party’s reaction was the most worrying. He frowned and squinted at Dark Spades, almost with anger. It was clear he didn’t believe him.

Dark Spades explained their reasons, but Party didn’t look convinced. On the other hand Joe and Andy were starting to see everything click into place. In the end, Ghoul was holding onto Party, looking at him with pleading eyes.

“No!” Party exclaimed, standing up. “You really think she did all those things? After all she has done for us?”

Bachelor looked up. He hadn’t said a single word since they met in the room and now he was staring at Party intensely. He pulled his shirt over his head, letting it fall on the floor with a soft thud. His cheeks grew red as everyone stared at his chest, which was full of fresh cuts, bruises, burns and some wounds that had been badly stitched and were still healing.

“She did this to me.” Bachelor whispered, wrapping his arms around himself in shame. “What he says, it’s all true. This is exactly what they did to Ryan, and I am not letting anyone do this to someone ever again. Not BL/ind, not S.I.G.H.T, no one.”

Party felt sick. There were too many things in his head and he was convinced Ashlynne was an angel that had been sent to him so he could see how amazing his creations could be. How great he could be. Ashlynne believed in him, like no one had.

He stormed out of the room, hissing. Ghoul gave them all an apologetic look and just said:

“I’ll make sure he doesn’t say anything.”

~

“Gerard.” Frank called him as he rushed down the corridors after his pissed boyfriend. He went into their room and almost slammed the door in his face. “Gerard!” he protested, barging in and seeing him go around in angry circles.

“How can they say that, Frank?” he muttered, looking at the floor. “Ashlynne’s not bad; she helped us when no one else did!”

“Don’t you see what she did to Bachelor?”

“You believe him?” Gerard asked, looking at him in disbelief.

“You think he did that to himself or what?” Frank answered, getting suddenly angry. “Didn’t you listen? Or do you think that just because she showed you some colors she’s goodness incarnated.”

“She believed in me!” Gerard shouted. “She actually made me feel like I’m not worthless!”

“Have I not believed in you?” Frank whispered, now feeling hurt, his eyes stinging slightly. “Have I not told you, over and over how amazing you are? Have I not been there for you from the very beginning? I’ve loved you, so much you said I made you happy. So why do you choose her over me?”

“Without her I would be dead, Frank.”

“Well maybe she can save you next time you feel like slitting your wrists.” He spat, and didn’t care anymore. He walked out of the room and closed the door behind him.

~

The room had fallen into a tense silence. Nobody dared to say a word and the only sound was Dark Spades shifting uncomfortably in his spot, feeling like he had caused more damage than good. Finally, the silence was broken by Ghoul, who came back looking tired. Party wasn’t with him.

“I guess its fine.” He whispered. “But we can’t count on him. Ashlynne’s cooed him into her ideas and now there’s no way we can make Party fight against her.”

“But… we’re rebels.” Bachelor said, finding his voice again and feeling more confident. “If anyone here is one of us, it’s Party. But now…”

“He doesn’t see S.I.G.H.T is just another version of BL/ind.” Patrick commented. “And there’s nothing we can do about it. Let’s just hope…”

“He doesn’t turn on us?” Pete asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Party is loyal.” Dark Spades defended him.

“He’s loyal to Ghoul and he just ditched him.” Bachelor added. “I don’t think we can trust him.”

Ghoul looked around to see faces that showed guilt.

“You heard?” he asked, not really in the mood to be mad about it.

“You guys were kind of loud.” Dark Spades said with an apologetic look.

“He’s not Party Poison anymore.” Frank said morbidly. “Party Poison slit his wrists and died on the desert. Now there’s only Hesitant Alien, Ashlynne’s most precious puppet. It’s just us on this.”

“For all we know, S.I.G.H.T is trying to exterminate what’s left of BL/ind. It’s true that our old enemy has taken some blows and it’s almost done for. Ashlynne won’t wait to send us down there and get the job done.” Dark Spades continued.

“It will be like the Poisonous Battle, only this time both sides are evil.” Pete snared, getting an approving hum from Patrick.

“The question is do we pretend to follow her orders or turn against her?” Bachelor inquired.

“I say we fight.” Patrick spoke up. “We can get BL/ind out of the way once and for all, and then we take care of S.I.G.H.T. We can’t fight both at the same time, so let’s just take advantage of Ashlynne and then bring her down.”

“Phoenix’s right.” Dark Spades agreed. “Hopefully Clovers can provide some more information about Ashlynne’s plans.”

“I haven’t seen him in a while, is everything okay?” Bachelor asked.

“Yeah, my brother’s a tough guy.” Dark Spades said, and smiled sweetly. “He just gets a lot into it and needs some space. I’m sure he’s fine.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Boots were been tied and guns were been held. It felt refreshing, to put on the harsh battle clothes once again, even if they were dusty and worn. It was like being back into their old skin. Frank was feeling calmed, even relaxed at the prospect of going out there again, now with a whole army even if it was of an organization no better than BL/ind itself.

What was bothering him was that Gerard was completely ignoring him. He had it coming, sure, the last thing he said was pretty harsh, but Frank was sure he was right in this situation. Ironically enough, so did Gerard. So now they were both too stubborn to talk things out. Because of the actions of a cruel and fair universe, they ended up in the same small ship that would take them to ground, both standing out in between the plain-black soldiers. Force to sit next to each other, Gerard stared out the window. Frank knew it was just to avoid talking to him, because Gerard wasn’t a fan of flying.

“Don’t do anything stupid, okay?” Frank said, and Gerard didn’t acknowledge him in any way. “Just because we’re mad at each other doesn’t mean I stop caring about you… doesn’t mean I stop loving you. So I will kill you if you get yourself hurt.”

Gerard stayed silent, and Frank had a sudden pain in his chest. He really wanted to stop fighting with him, but the only way was that Gerard came over to their side. Which was not happening soon.

“Are you and your new squad going to pull some stunt?” he asked in a monotonous voice.

“Not yet.”

“Okay.”

“I don’t want to fight anymore. I want you to believe me.”

“Why should I? You said to run to Ashlynne if I felt like dying.”

Frank felt something inside his chest shatter at Gerard’s coldness. He had never talked to him like that, and it hurt like hell.

“I’m sorry about that. Really.”

“Mm hmm.”

“Gerard, please…”

“Just leave it, Frank. You made your choice, I made mine.”

“I shouldn’t have to choose between you and what’s right! I want you by my side!”

“Same here.”

“Fine then.”

Frank was done begging him. He would go down with the operation when it comes to it, but he would also keep an eye on Gerard. He could do both. When they exited the little ship and jumped down on solid ground, the wind picked up as if it was welcoming them. Frank felt more at home there where it was dusty and hot than up there in the giant metal cage.

There were only a few draculoids on sight, and they didn’t even have their weapons drawn. Korse was there too, sided by Devotee. She looked devastated, his white glowing hair was flicking on and off, it seemed like her power was weak. She gasped when Tyler’s feet hit the ground.

Everybody felt a sudden change in the atmosphere, and when they turned around they saw Tyler, stone-cold expression and irradiating dark smoke from all over his body. A few steps back was Josh, looking determined as well but a little worried. Tyler’s steps echoed throughout the field, no one dared to move. Ashlynne was close to him, matching Korse’s formation.

“You…” Devotee breathed out, looking at Ashlynne with wide eyes. “It was always you…”

“That’s right Dev, it’s me.” Ashlynne answered, smiling. “Did you know that the closer we are to Acceptance, the stronger the power? Guess that means you’re the underdog here, Denial. And yet you insist on protecting this… bastard. You got away with that for a while, but now Depression over here has no boundaries and given our boy Acceptance isn’t here, he’s the one dictating the rules.”

“I will not bow to a demon in the carcass of a kid.” Devotee spat, and Tyler raised his hand towards her. She immediately collapsed on her knees and everybody drew their weapons, pointing at each other but not firing. Devotee, who was gasping for air, raised her delicate and injured hand and all Tyler could hear was a gun hitting the ground and a whimper at his back.

He turned around to see Josh, completely paralyzed, his eyes wandering around without really seeing. Devotee was blinding him, showing things only he could see and that seemed to be terrifying him.

“Let him go.” Tyler demanded, pushing Devotee even further into his spell.

“Then back off.” She managed to say, and a second later Tyler’s smoke aura went out.

Ashlynne looked like she was about to kill someone, while Tyler was slowly stepping back. He knew she would react badly if he did anything sudden. Instead she held her gun and pulled the trigger, the zap flying through the air and landing on Josh’s shoulder.

Everything turned into chaos.

Shots started been fired, body’s hitting the floor left and right. Ashlynne tried to seek protection with Gerard, because Tyler was now pissed beyond end and more powerful than ever. However, Gerard was completely frozen over what had happened. Had Ashlynne just shot Spooky Jim? Why? Why would she do that?

He was so out of it the only thing he felt was Frank’s hand shoving him aside and making him move, going back to reality. Avoiding getting shot by any of the rays, Frank made them take cover behind a dead bush, shooting over his shoulder.

“Stay here, lower your head.” He ordered.

“What?” Gerard protested. Was Frank really telling him to stay hidden while everyone else was out there battling? Who did he think he was? Why was everyone acting so fucking strange!? “No!”

“You’re distracted, you’re gonna get yourself killed.”

“I’m not, I-I’m fine! I’m not gonna let you fight alone, we’re a team!”

Frank looked at him in disbelief. What was wrong with this man? First he’s mad and won’t talk to him and now they were a team again?

“Look Frank, I’m sorry I-” a shot flew very close to Frank’s head, making him hiss and burning a little bit of his hair.

“Now’s not the time for apologies.” He said. He didn’t sound mad; it was just the heat of the battle. “Party Poison or Hesitant Alien, you know how to shoot. Make it back safe and we’ll talk about it, deal?”

“Deal.” He muttered, jumping into action and feeling the familiar rush in his veins. The feeling was ecstatic. In a few seconds the draculoids were either dead or retiring quickly. A hurt Devotee carried a very hurt Korse a little bit back before disappearing, and when the fuss was over everyone ran to check on their loved ones.

Phoenix’s tapped the Youngblood’s heads, counting them and making sure they were complete, just like a teacher in a field trip. Frank and Gerard weren’t so far from each other, and quick glances told them they were both okay.

“Josh, Josh…” Tyler was muttering while he held his lover in his arms, protecting him with his body.

“Agh, I’m okay Ty, don’t worry.” He whined, trying to hide his pain and not look at the bleeding wound on his shoulder. Tyler glared at Ashlynne, but kept his temper on the line because if he got too flustered his power could hurt Josh. He would deal with Ashlynne later, when he made sure Josh was back on the ship and getting stitched up.

Ashlynne didn’t look at anyone. She just got into one of the small ships, hissing to herself, and the machine flew up into the sky and got lost. Slowly but steadily, everybody helped each other into the ships to go back, not really sure if they felt like they won or not.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You know that feeling when everything you’ve believed in suddenly falls apart before your eyes?

Well that’s what Gerard felt. An utter sense of betrayal and anger at his own stupidity, at not seeing what everyone saw and told him was there. To remember he had openly defended Ashlynne made him sick. How he had been so stubborn and bitchy with Frank only made it worst.

He apologized a million times, and even though Frank told him he forgave him, Gerard knew the only way to fix this was doing something about it.

Nobody had been seriously wounded, just a few cuts and scratches, nothing out of the ordinary for them. Gerard wanted to go check on Jim, but Blurryface wouldn’t leave his side and honestly, everybody was a little afraid of him, even though they knew he used to be a troubled kid who knew nothing about the desert and just escaped the city with his best friend. They had another meeting in Phoenix and Believer’s room (which Believer didn’t look so pleased about) and everybody was nervously picking at their bandages. Frank had to shave a piece of his hair to cover the wound on his head, and didn’t look too happy. Mainly because his hair was wild and having a bald patch looked ridiculous.

Gerard had apologized to all of them, and made it clear he was on their side. What had happened in the battle had opened his eyes and now he was willing to take part of the ‘we know S.I.G.H.T is evil’ team. Nobody seemed too reluctant about it, it seemed like Party Poison still had his rebel image. Even if Gerard didn’t feel like him at all, he had learned to hide behind the yellow, clown-eyed mask.

Suddenly, Dark Spades burst through the door, panting. His face was red and his eyes were like a storm, dark blue mixed with grey and some tears were threating to spill.

“My brother…” He opened his mouth, his lips trembling when he whispered: “I can’t find him.”

~

Dark Spades could calm anyone he wanted, except himself. He was absolutely convinced Clovers was fine, sure he hadn’t seen him in a while but that wasn’t new to him. His brother was a teenager; he couldn’t expect to have him on a leash at all times. He would go missing from days a time, like a cat, but would always come back with ruffled hair looking for food. Dark Spades had followed him, of course, but had found that the teen just bundled up in a dark place to make experiments about things that he found fascinating, or just be alone for a while. He didn’t harm anyone or himself, so Dark Spades had learned to trust him.

But never, not once, had Crimson Clovers go missing without his brother knowing where he was. He would silently leave him snacks and meals when he got so immerse he forgot to eat.

Dark Spades blamed himself for not looking into it any sooner. ‘Oh, I’ll just go into battle and look for him after’. How stupid. He had walked the ship, searched every room and every corner thrice, and his brother was nowhere to be seen. He felt panic rising in his chest, and now he couldn’t look properly because the tears where blinding him. His hands were shaking, it was getting hard to breathe and he felt light-headed. But he couldn’t have a panic attack now, that way he would never find Clovers.

He decided to ask for help, because by now he was getting desperate. Everybody started looking on the most non-suspicious way they could, but they did get some weird looks from the soldiers.

Dark Spades asked Frank to take Hearts, but there was only so much he could do, the child on the verge of tears. He tried to soothe her, telling him everybody was searching for Clovers, but the kid was completely heartbroken and crying out of worry for his brother.

Phoenix was walking besides Dark Spades, his presence giving him strength to keep going. But it was too much for him, the despair he felt got the best of him and he fell to his knees, crying as his hair fell on his face. Phoenix knelt beside him and tried to make him stand, but it was like his body was made of stone. Instead, he wrapped his arms around him and held him close to his chest, his sobs rocking his shoulders harshly.

Phoenix didn’t know how much they stayed there, in the floor of the hallway; soldiers walking pass them as if they were invisible. Only one person stopped besides them. Phoenix didn’t look up, but Dark Spades did, seeing Blurryface’s soft brown eyes.

“I know where your brother is.” He whispered, and felt a sting of pain in his chest when he saw Dark Spade’s eyes turn a hopeful warm green. He stood up shakily, using Phoenix’s arm to pull himself up and blindly followed Tyler that guided him through the hallways he was not allowed into. The doors that were locked for almost everyone opened without a hitch for Tyler, until the little group reached a hidden room, which looked dusty and forgotten.

There, lying on the floor was Crimson Clovers, lifeless.

Phoenix swallowed loudly and Tyler just stayed silent, cursing his powers for making him the bearer of terrible news.

“Adrian…” Dark Spades murmured, rushing to his brother’s side and taking him into his arms. Clover’s head fell backwards, completely limp. His eyelids were swollen, his lips were broken and his chest had multiple stab wounds, his shirt completely soaked in dry blood. Dark Spades held his head and tapped his cheek, as if that way he could wake him up. “Adrian… Adrian… please, no… no no no”

“Spades…” Phoenix whispered, afraid to come any closer, but worried someone would come and they would get caught.

“My brother… my baby brother…” he cried holding Clover’s lifeless bodies close to him, tears were cascading down his cheeks. “Oh he was so afraid of dying, he was so afraid and I wasn’t there… I’m sorry Adrian… I’m sorry… this is all my fault…”

He trembled, and something strange happened. Tyler stepped back, a hand over his chest. Phoenix full on fell to the ground, his legs suddenly too weak to hold him up. Everybody on the ship was hit by a wave that knocked them off their feet, because a sudden stinging pain in their chest left them breathless. It was raw pain, something nobody could really explained except it _hurt_.

Gerard felt it, and recognized it almost instantly. It was the same pain he felt when he found Mickey dead on the road. Frank felt it too, similar to the way it had hurt when his brothers passed and Gerard was crying miserably over them.

For Brendon it was like shooting Ryan, watching him fall and holding him on his arms all over again.

The inexplicable pain reminded Josh of when he watched Tyler shoot himself and fall to the ground.

It was Dark Spade’s cries. A weeping sound that echoed throughout the whole ship, in everyone’s mind, and his pain was so intense and raw his powers acted out and started hurting the people around him.

Everybody went to bed, but nobody could move Dark Spades or even separate him an inch from his brother. He didn’t care if someone found him. Ashlynne could kill him for all he cared. The wave got stronger when he heard Frank trying to hold a crying Hearts back, the short man exerting all his strength in keeping the little girl away from the scene. Dark Spades was thankful for it. She then ran away and locked herself in her brother’s room.

Frank held onto Gerard when they lied down to rest, and Gerard wrapped his whole body around him, not letting go and shedding a few tears. The Youngbloods pushed two beds together and lied all together under the covers, all tangled with in each other’s protective embrace. Tyler stayed up in bed with Josh, careful with his wounded shoulder but with an arm around him, Josh burying his tear-stained face in his chest. And Brendon… Brendon just curled up on his bed and cried over a memory until he fell asleep.

It went on and on, all night, and suddenly everyone was grateful their loved ones were alive, hurt that some weren’t anymore and over all…

Deeply afraid of what was to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! here's a new chapter and I'm having so much fun writing this, I'm really glad you're enjoying it ;)  
> Thank you to all of you who have left comments and kudos, I get extremely happy when I read them or get the notification so thank you very very much <3 <3


	10. You Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a point when that inicial sadness turns into burning anger. Dark Spades is about to find out.
> 
> Something is happening to Tyler, and Josh can feel it.
> 
> with the two sides finally divided, Ashlynne realizes she understimated the guys. But they understimated her too.

The screaming eventually stopped. The people on the ship walked around blinking rapidly and looking dazed, most of them couldn’t pinpoint why. The rebels could. Once again they found themselves in Phoenix and Believer’s room, which had become their reunion room without anyone really pointing it out. This time, Tyler and Josh were there. Josh still had a bandage around his shoulder and Tyler wouldn’t leave his side for a second.

“Things are pretty clear now huh.” Believer whispered, and his voice sounded louder with the echo of the room. “The question is what are we going to do?”

“I think is more of a ‘how’.” Phoenix added, fiddling with his fingers. “Any ideas?”

“Ashlynne knows we’re onto her.” Gerard said. He hadn’t said anything since Clovers had been found dead, and Frank was really worried about him. “She has to know. The safest move is to stay low for a while.”

“My brother was killed and you want to stay low?” Hearts said, clenching her small fist and glaring at Gerard. All the adults had been watching her closely, she was still very young after all, but Hearts didn’t seem to need any help. Her sadness turned into anger, and she was fucking pissed. Frank knew that if she had the opportunity she would go up to Ashlynne and beat her up. Or at least try to.

“We can’t risk another one of us dying, Hearts.” Frank spoke, trying to be rational. “I know you’re mad and trust me when I say she won’t get away with this, we won’t let her.”

That seemed to reassure her, and when she sighed Frank saw that deep down she just wanted to cry.

“Tyler.” She said, and both Tyler and Josh turned their heads towards her. “Can you… feel if my brother is okay? He was always afraid of whatever there is after death.”

Everyone was surprised by her composure, and suddenly Tyler felt like his powers weren’t so horrible. Josh looked at him with a question in his eyes. Tyler never spoke about what he could do, and Josh never pressed on the matter.

“He’s okay.” Tyler answered. “At peace, I mean. He’s not scared anymore.”

Hearts just nodded, and wrapped her little arms around herself. The conversation shifted into them talking strategy, and coming to the agreement that they would be submissive, nod their head yes to whatever Ashlynne or her soldiers said, and just wait out until they were once again on land. When Ashlynne sends them back to battle, and she will, they would whip out their guns and take over the whole situation.

Because they were rebels. They fought for what they believed and went against the system at the cost of their freedom, and sometimes even their lives. BL/ind has been trying to extinguish the flame of the rebellion for years, and never succeeded entirely.

S.I.G.H.T isn’t going to either.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This wasn’t a case of an unsolved murder. Dark Spades knew exactly who had stabbed his brother and left him bleeding to death. And he had always been the kind of person who heals people instead of hurting them. His powers were meant to help, to soothe. No matter what happened in his little community on the underground, or with the people he used to sell drugs to, Dark Spades couldn’t stay angry for long. There was just something inside him that suffocated anger before he could do anything under its influence.

That little thing inside him was now broken.

Nobody, absolutely nobody messed with his family.

Ashlynne did, and she was going to get it from him.

He stood in front of the command room’s door, adrenaline rushing through his veins, feeling awake and alert even though he hadn’t slept at all. He didn’t knock, he took the handle and ripped the whole thing off, throwing it behind him and hearing how it hit the ground and all the bolts clinked on the floor. Of course Ashlynne was expecting that, but not this soon.

“You evil bitch.” Dark Spades said through his gritted teeth. He was like a storm in the middle of the ocean, lighting and thunder flashing behind his eyes, an enormous wrath fueling the power that sparked between his fingertips. He didn’t know what that burning energy could do, but he was willing to find out.

“Dark Spades, you’re one of The Five.” Ashlynne said, not surprised. She was actually pretty calm for someone who was being faced by someone who was irradiating power. She looked pleased instead.

“I’m not.” He answered, his lip quivering slightly. “But you are.”

Ashlynne just raised her eyebrows.

“You killed my brother, Bargain. You are going to feel my wrath and die a horrendous death.” His voice was low and dangerous, and he was ready to avenge his brother when he was suddenly frozen in place. The air left his lungs and he forgot how to breathe. Ashlynne just smirked.

“Like you said, I’m one of The Five. And you’re not. Therefore I am more powerful than you; you’re just a residue, a mistake. A shitty replacement for Acceptance and ironically enough you are the weakest of us. I may not have the destructive powers of Depression, but do not patronize me for a second, Dark Spades.”

Even though he was completely paralyzed, Dark Spades wasn’t scared. He didn’t care if Ashlynne aka Bargain killed him or not. She could torture him, reduce him to pieces and he still wouldn’t care. And honestly, he kind of wanted Ashlynne to put a bullet in his head, at least that way the blinding pain would stop. Who knows, maybe he’d get to see Clovers again, tell him he was sorry. Tell Clovers he loved him.

Instead, Ashlynne snapped her fingers and Dark Spade’s world went dark. His irises turned black like a pot of boiling tar, spilling like ink all over his pure white sclera and flowing over his eyelids and down his cheeks like tears. He was completely blind and felt like he was deprived of oxygen. His sense of balance failed him when Ashlynne’s rough hands shoved him forward, and dragged him through hallways, not caring if he ran into corners harshly. Dark Spades tried to get free of her grip, but his limbs were useless. So useless he couldn’t stop Ashlynne from shutting thick cuffs around his wrists, nor could he pull against the chains to at least give some of a fight.

The last thing he heard was Ashlynne’s heels clicking away from him, and a door slamming shut.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Josh?” Tyler whispered. The room was in complete darkness, and Josh was supposed to be sleeping. But Tyler noticed his breathing wasn’t deep and regular like when he was asleep, so he knew his boyfriend was awake. Tyler tended to notice those details. “Why can’t you sleep?”

“I’m worried about you.” Josh answered. His bright pink hair had faded already, he seemed to be paler now that he wasn’t getting any sunlight, and his pretty mocha eyes were tired all the time.

“Why?” that Tyler didn’t understand. He was completely fine; Ashlynne wouldn’t lay a finger on him or Josh so what was keeping his lover awake? “Is it because of Clovers? Because you don’t have to.”

“I notice things, Tyler. How you don’t sleep, how you’re always roaming around. I know you, I know is not good when you roam because you do that every time something is out of place. You did it all the time in Battery City, and you do it here.”

“You also know what is wrong with me.” Tyler said his voice plain and monotonous. “It didn’t take your sleep before, it shouldn’t now.”

Josh stayed silent. Not the peaceful silent, but the ‘I’m angry at you’ silent.

“What did I say?” he asked, innocently.

“Nothing, Tyler.” He answered. Tyler should write a book on how to get someone mad with just two sentences. “Just leave it.”

“Why are you mad?” he pressed on. “Don’t be mad, you do stupid shit when you’re mad at me.”

“Oh do I really?” Josh asked sarcastically.

“Yeah, like the time you literally ran down the road screaming at 3 in the morning because you were frustrated.”

“You remember that?” he questioned, and his voice let Tyler know he was amused.

“How could I forget? You said you did it because the butterflies in your stomach were confusing you. And for some reason you blamed that on me. We fought about something stupid, and then you ran and some guards started chasing you. You almost got caught and locked away forever. So, don’t be mad, please.”

“Look who’s talking. You climbed a tree after a fight to get away from me. I stood there yelling at you to get down and you were too stubborn to admit you were stuck.”

“I told you to stop calling me and you threw rocks at my window until you smashed it and my parents called the cops.”

“You didn’t speak to me for three weeks because I broke one of your ukulele’s strings. Even though you knew it was an accident _and_ even though it was illegal to have it you went to my house and played it horribly so I couldn’t sleep.”

“You back-flipped down the street when I told you to fuck off.”

Josh giggled slightly, and Tyler felt his chest warm up with that beautiful sound.

“We fought a lot, didn’t we?” he said, and he wasn’t so mad anymore. “And did a lot of crazy stuff.”

“We fought a lot because we were too scared to admit we liked each other. So we went on making the other’s life more difficult than it already was.”

“Aw come on, we did good shit as well. When I finally accepted I had a crush on you and started spoiling you rotten in any way I could.”

“You used to sneak in stores and steal candy for me.” Tyler said with a smile. “I thought it was the cutest thing ever.”

“Things have changed.” Josh whispered sadly, and snuggled closer to Tyler.

“And that’s okay. It’s not our fault.” Tyler soothed him, running his fingers through his hair. Josh flinched and tried to hide it, but Tyler noticed. “I know why you’re mad. I’m hurting you.”

“That’s not true…”

“Don’t lie to me Josh.” Tyler said with a stern voice, and Josh fell silent. “I’ve been slowly draining you and you’ve been too nice to tell me. But I’ve known all along.”

“If you knew then why didn’t you leave?”

That sounded a lot like an accusation, and Josh didn’t mean it that way. He was just conflicted between his love for Tyler and the harm he brought onto him. Feeling weak and tired, being sick after almost every meal wasn’t fun.

“Because I’m selfish.” Tyler murmured, and pressed a soft kiss to his temple. “And I can’t bear the thought of leaving you. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Josh answered and rolled over so Tyler was on top of him. “Kiss me instead.”

Tyler hesitated for a second, but then leaned down to press his lips against Josh’s. The pink-haired man wrapped his arms around his neck, pulling him closer even though he knew he would feel awful afterwards. But in that moment, with Tyler’s body pressed against his, his lips meeting and their tongues dancing together, he felt whole. He felt out of breath, with a soft warm energy flowing slowly through his veins, the burn of it painful and pleasurable at the same time.

Tyler felt alive. In his world full of smoke and darkness, the feeling of Josh’s skin, his lips, his scent, it all felt so real. So tangible, the only certain thing he could latch onto. He kissed him feverishly, wanting more of that sensation of safety and care Josh provided. It was almost like a drug, a drug that numbed his pain and left him all relaxed and high. That’s why he didn’t notice Josh’s hands on his shoulders trying to push him away, Tyler was so lost in his bliss he didn’t notice Josh fighting to get out of his embrace, kicking his shins and clawing at his back, nor he felt Josh lose his strength, nor his arms falling limp to his sides. Josh wasn’t scared; it was like falling sleep, with a bittersweet taste on his tongue and his head full of clouds.

Suddenly, the lights were turned on, and a voice filled the room.

“Guys?” Bachelor said, not entering the room completely. “Do you know where Dark Spades is? We’ve been looking for him and…”

He trailed off when he heard Josh’s small whimpers, and entered the room only to see Tyler hunched over him, pinning his wrists down. Josh seemed to be fighting to stay conscious, trembling while Tyler kissed and bit his lips like a hungry vampire. Bachelor immediately bolted forward, taking Tyler by the shoulders and pulling him off Josh, making him fall harshly onto the floor. Tyler grunted and glared at him, blood-red eyes shining with anger.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Bachelor shouted, making Tyler flinch back a little and get down from his high. He was dizzy and confused, seeing how Bachelor shook Josh slightly until he opened his eyes.

Tyler covered his mouth and a burning pain rose in his chest when he saw that Josh was barely awake, his skin had acquired a sickly grey color, and the veins underneath his pale skin were like dark rivers flowing with difficulty. But his eyes… those bright mocha eyes had a thick white layer over them, taking away the color and the life in them, making them look dead. And despite all that, Josh used the last bits of his strength to raise his arm and reach for him, his dry and chapped lips mouthing his name.

“What have you done?!” Bachelor yelled, his hands holding Josh up so he could breathe. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM??”

“I… I just…” Tyler tried to explain, but the words got caught in his throat, tears starting to flow.

“You monster… get the fuck out of here. Leave him alone.”

Tyler couldn’t take it anymore. His feet made him rush out of the room and into the hallway, which started spinning violently. Voices started screaming in his ears and even though he was pretty sure he had his eyes open, he couldn’t see anything. He screamed, but nobody heard him. After a few seconds of agony, everything stopped. And he felt like himself again. He heard Josh calling him and saw him limping towards him, Bachelor following him closely.

“Are you okay?” he asked, breathing heavily but looking slightly better. Was Josh really asking _him_ if he was okay? After what he had done?

“Josh… no, no… stay away from m-me.” He pleaded, crawling back and looking at the floor.

“Tyler…” he tried to call him, but he was already standing up and sprinting down the hallway with an inhuman speed. Josh felt dizzy again and groaned in pain, making Bachelor help him up and into his room again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Any luck?” Frank asked, resting his hands on his knees and looking at Gerard through his sweaty hair. Gerard just shook his head and let out a sigh. The ‘let’s be discrete’ plan was thrown out the window when Dark Spades went missing. Sure, the rebels were giving him some space after what had happened, but never stopped keeping an eye on him. They didn’t want the story to repeat itself. And yet there they were, rushing up and down the hallways trying to find their friend that had so mysteriously disappeared overnight. Just like Clovers.

They weren’t letting Dark Spades get killed, so they were trying to find him at all costs. Their only hope was Tyler, who could tract him by his aura. However, Bachelor filled them in on what had happened and now Tyler was MIA as well. The Youngbloods were pretty worried about Josh, given how awful he looked and that their bond was stronger. After hearing the story, a tense silence fell over them, sharing scared glances until Josh spoke up:

“He didn’t mean to hurt me.” He assured. “He just couldn’t control himself. It’s not his fault, he’s not a monster.”

That did little to ease the tension everybody felt when Tyler appeared almost out of nowhere, arms wrapped around his chest and head low. Bachelor huffed angrily at him but otherwise everybody stayed silent.

“Dark Spades is still alive.” He stated. “But Ashlynne did something to him. Something bad. For what I can feel he’s in some kind of prison in the upper part of the ship. I don’t know exactly where, the power around it is pissing me off.”

He really looked annoyed. Josh noticed the slight twitching in his hands, how his head would twitch to the side at times and how he blinked rapidly as if he was trying to get away from a bad dream.

“Well that just means this is war.” Believer said, standing up straighter. “We take the bitch down now.”

“You can’t.” Tyler said with an urgent voice. “I mean, she’s Bargain. One of The Five. She’s been hiding her powers to make you believe she was human, when in reality she’s like Devotee. She’s like me.” He saw Josh flinch at that statement.

“You’re nothing like her.” He said, a little pissed.

“You know what I meant.” Tyler answered harshly, and everybody kind of shifted towards Josh to protect him. Tyler noticed it, and shook his head with an expression of sorrow.

“You’re more powerful than her, right?” Frank asked, cautiously. “You can bring her down with a finger.”

“You can make yourself invisible, right?” Josh asked, still leaning a little onto Bachelor. “Like that time we almost got out.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure.” Something was wrong with Tyler. Something was happening and Josh could feel it. “Besides, now the cameras have ultra-v, so I can’t sneak past them. She’ll see me coming.”

“Ty are you okay?” Josh questioned, giving him a look full of worry.

“I’m fine!” he screamed, and his voice got deep and distorted, his eyes lit up with red and a low growl left his throat. A second later he was back, panting heavily but still on his feet. “But I have an idea that will work. I’ll find a hatch I can go through, and I’ll climb outside of the ship to drop-kick her from above. She won’t expect it.”

“Isn’t that a little dangerous…?” Phoenix whispered, and Josh agreed with him. He glared at Tyler like he was scolding him for being so reckless, to which Tyler only answered:

“I’ve always been good at climbing.”

Josh got free from Bachelor’s grip and walked up to Tyler before anyone could do anything. He stood there in front of him, throwing his head backwards to look at him in the eye and puffing out his chest. Tyler just looked at him, a pinch of sadness and shame in his eyes.

“Tyler Joseph.” He said. “If you fall off this ship, I will personally kill you.”

Tyler gave him a little smile, and even dared to place a hand on Josh’s cheek. Josh swallowed hard but placed his palm on top of his, and sighed.

“I promise I won’t fall off this ship.”

And a second later he was just a blur of black smoke floating away from them. Josh watched him disappear and began to pray silently.

~

Tyler fought through the most recent wave of nausea and made it to the top of the ship, forcefully opening the hatch and climbing out. The wind hit his face like a rock and his eyes started watering so much he couldn’t see anything. But he pushed through it, closed the hatch and held onto the small ladder steps. He didn’t know why he felt so sick, if being with Josh had been so peaceful and pleasurable. He tried not to think too much about that. Ignoring the annoying sound of the wind in his ears, he started climbing along the ship, until his hands hurt like hell and he started getting lightheaded from the pressure.

He tried to block it all out, like he had done when something such as pain bothered him. He used his power to protect himself, and it worked in its own half-assed way, letting him breathe a mouthful but not taking away the soreness of his muscles.

Despite all, he couldn’t just give up. He needed to make it right. He thought about Josh and how he used to get anxious every time he started to climb those abandoned structures back in Battery City. How he would chew on his thumbs when Tyler was so high up he could barely see him. Only hearing him when he giggled like a small child at the sensation of vertigo. That particular memory calmed him down, and he was able to make it to the nose of the ship, where he literally punched a hole in the front window, and smiled evilly when Ashlynne whipped around to see him like a bug on a windshield.

The glass started shattering and melting with his touch and Ashlynne started to back away from him. The air pressure dropping considerably didn’t seem to bother neither of them, even though there were alarms going off everywhere. Tyler stared at Ashlynne with cold, dead eyes, and without warning raised his hands towards her and she fell to the ground.

Tyler felt her power pushing against his, but he was stronger and managed to almost suffocate her. Then Ashlynne got on her feet with difficulty and moved to smack Tyler across the face, with incredible force and speed. It made him lose focus and gave Ashlynne the chance to regain control. Tyler fought with his blackened hands and gritted his teeth when Ashlynne didn’t seem to care that he was literally burning her skin. He focused on her head, her mind, and she started screaming in agony but didn’t back down for a second.

Then Tyler started to lose strength and his head started pounding, he felt dizzy and his sight was blurry and in slow motion. Ashlynne punched him in the face two, three, four times, drawing blood and reducing him to a simple weak pulp. He screamed out when he felt his own powers turn against him and start hurting him, just like before, his mind burning like hell. It was like having Blurryface acting out again, mocking him when he was younger, making his existence miserable and making him want to just die.

Ashlynne noticed she didn’t have to pin Tyler down, since the guy was writhing on the floor and couldn’t do anything about it. She stood up and examined her wounds, huffing at the burns on her arms and wiping the blood off her broken lip.

“If I could suck Blurryface out of you, I would dump your sorry ass off this ship.” She growled, walking towards Tyler with sparks coming out of her fingertips. “Without him you won’t survive.”

“Love to see you try.” Blurry spoke, burning Tyler’s throat but laughing maniacally at the newfound control he had. Then he pushed it too far, and the chains clinked and dragged him back down.

“It has come to this, uh.” Ashlynne spoke calmly, ignoring the alarms and the wind around them. “You need Blurryface to stay alive. How ironic.”

She took Tyler by the neck and he couldn’t fight her anymore, all he did was give her slight burns on the wrists as he tried to get free. In a second he was defenseless like a ragdoll, staring at the fluffy clouds that almost looked like they could catch him. The last thing he saw was Ashlynne’s victory smirk, before she threw him away from her, his body hitting the glass that broke into a million tiny shards that, just for a moment, flew around him like snowflakes before gracefully falling down.

Just like Tyler, that suddenly found no ground to support him, just the merciless abyss of the bright blue sky, swallowing him whole.

~

Ashlynne hated inconveniences. She hated it when things didn’t go her way, and oh was she so naïve to think she could bring rebels in her ship, her kingdom, and expect them not to overthrown her. That’s what rebels did, and she thought she could change that.

The only governor they accepted was themselves.

Silly, silly Ashlynne. She would have to go with plan B, no mercy, just the ancient teacher.

Pain.

She didn’t have to hide her powers anymore, so she slipped through the hallways like air, and planted the seed of chaos between the men hoping to win. Like a lethal siren she lead them all in separate ways, separate rooms, and they had no idea what was happening or that it was her. The things she had promised were always the same, things most humans appealed.

But not these guys. These guys were so hardened, so broken by the unforgiving desert that the things they wanted were simple. Peace, love. Their loved ones, dead or alive, to be with them. For the war to end. That was a pleasant surprise for Ashlynne.

The first room she entered to was Gerard’s and Fun Ghoul’s. The Fabulous Four reduced to a Dynamic Duo. Warriors and lovers, no matter what happened with these two, they were almost inseparable.

Almost.

When they go out of the bliss, they weren’t in the same place as before. They didn’t remember moving into a solitary room. Frank sure as hell didn’t remember entering into a tall glass prison. He blinked at Gerard and saw that he was as confused as he was. Frank tried to find a way to get out of there, but saw that the only way out was up. The glass prison didn’t have a top, and if he was ten feet tall he could easily climb over it.

It was far too tall for Gerard to help him out, and even if he could, Ashlynne was standing right there.

“Let him out.” Gerard growled, and Ashlynne just tilted her head.

“Oh Gerard.” She said. “I really thought you could be a powerful weapon to me. I still believe it, but apparently you don’t.”

“I am nobody’s weapon.” He answered, and as soon as those words left his mouth, something below Frank’s feet shifted. And suddenly his little glass prison became… a fish tank. Water starting bubbling out of the floor, damping his shoes and forcing him to step to the far corner.

“Swear to me Gerard, swear over your heart you will become my weapon. My second in command, my servant, my loyal ally. Swear you’ll fight by my side, against your comrades, against anyone and anything I tell you to. Only then will the water stop flowing.”

Said water was now at Frank’s knees, and he was starting to feel desperate. Even so, he looked at Gerard and shook his head. Gerard bit his lip so hard it bled, and Ashlynne just stood there waiting for an answer.

“Gee, don’t.” Frank said, and his breath made the glass foggy. “You can’t, you can’t…”

“Yes.” Gerard said. “I’ll do whatever you want, just let him live.”

“No!” Frank screamed, and the water reached his waist like icy blades piercing his skin.

“I tried so that you would come to me by your own means, and I almost made it…” Ashlynne muttered, walking towards the door. “All I had to do was show you some colors on a wall. I wasn’t lying, S.I.G.H.T wasn’t always mine, but I sure as hell didn’t order to paint over the walls or build that projection room. My ways are more effective, a thousand times more painful but effective indeed. By being my soldier you will be stripped off your personality, your bonds. I will break you down completely and build a new Gerard Way out of the pieces. And the first thing I need to break is your heart.”

And she left. Frank and Gerard looked at each other; the only sound present was their heavy breaths, and a small cry that got out of Gerard’s throat.

“I can’t swim, Gee.” Frank said in a broken whisper.

“I know.” Gerard answered.

Frank just looked down, the image of his feet all wobbly and distorted. He knew there was no way out and Gerard knew it too. He didn’t cry, he didn’t want to contribute to the raising water that would eventually cover him and drown him, not even with a single tear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! hope you're having a great week  
> After all we've been through, the series is coming to an end in the next chapter.  
> I've fallen in love with this series and the characters, and I will do my best to give them the ending they deserve.  
> Thanks so much to every reader, for the comments and kudos, that always makes me happy.  
> Love you all! <3


	11. To Their Revenge, Their Victory.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time never stops, empires eventually fall.  
> People suffer, but throughout the years this people carved by the desert have kept a flame alive.  
> A flame that is now the start of a fire.

Gerard banged his hands on the glass, defeated. He had tried everything, but the transparent walls imprisoning Frank were intact, like they were mocking him for not being able to do much more than a scratch. Ashlynne had locked the door behind her, and the room was practically empty. Gerard had punched and kicked the glass until Frank shouted at him to stop. How he could be so calm was making Gerard even more nervous. 

“Gee.” He called. The water was now damping his chest, and Frank was standing on his tiptoes. “Relax. It’s okay.” 

“No, it’s not okay!!” Gerard cried. “I need to get you out of there, I will, I just need more time!” 

“There’s no more time.” Frank whined, and placed his hands on the glass. Gerard breathed in and out and saw that Frank was shaking just like him. He placed his hands on top of Frank’s and it almost felt like they were touching. Staring into his deep hazel eyes, a small tear rolled down Gerard’s cheek and Frank just soothed him. 

“It will be okay.” He assured. “You will be okay.” 

“Frank…” Gerard whispered. He was absolutely sick of the pain in his chest, that no matter how hard he tried it would always be back, one way or another. He was sick of losing people. The prospect of being all alone terrified him, it was like walking down the desert road after battle all over again, just that now Frank was dying before his eyes and there was nothing he could do about it. 

The steady rumble of the water filled the room, and when it reached Frank’s neck he really started to panic. His body felt heavy like a rock and he tried so hard to just float but it seemed nearly impossible. 

“You don’t have to watch.” Frank said. His voice was a little hoarse. Gerard just rested his head against the cold glass, his hair falling over his face, but Frank could hear his sobbing. Sure, being in a tank filling with water without knowing what how to swim was bad, but watching your lover drown on that tank? That had to be heart-wrenching. 

After some moments of tilting his head back to breathe, Frank took a long, deep breath and let the water cover him completely. Gerard looked up, his eyes full of tears, and saw Frank right in front of him, squinting slightly at the sensation of the water in his opened eyes. His long dark hair was flowing beautifully around him, and he seemed… calm. Just floating there like a merman. But then the air escaped him in a string of bubbles, and he started struggling to get out, to swim like he didn’t know how to the surface. The water entered his lungs, burning his chest and his throat begging for release. Gerard couldn’t watch anymore, he screamed loudly to ease the pressure in his chest and that’s when the lock clicked, and the door opened. 

It was Spooky Jim. He was looking better already, less pale and stronger. He scanned the scene with his mocha eyes and ran towards them. 

“Boost me up.” He ordered, and Gerard just stared at him. “He’s running out of air Gerard boost me up!!” 

Gerard snapped out of his confusion and linked his hands so Josh could step on them. He was pretty strong, and managed to fully extend his arms over his head, supporting him as high as he could. It made it easier for Josh to grab on the edge of the glass and jump into the water with a splash. 

He swam down with expertise and grabbed Frank’s wrists, squeezing it tightly and pulling him towards him to wrap an arm around his chest. Frank was barely conscious, his head was about to explode and Josh hugging his chest wasn’t making it any better. Josh kicked his feet as fast as he could, and was finally able to hold Frank’s head over the water. But his neck wasn’t supporting him any longer, his eyes closed and his head thrown back. 

“Poison!” Josh called, and with all his might he pushed Ghoul’s body over the edge, and Gerard was there to catch him as he fell. 

He laid his lover on the floor, his clothes forming a puddle below him and his wet hair sticking to his temples. Gerard started pressing his chest, putting his whole body into it, whispering pleads under his breath. He wasn’t giving up, not on Frank. Finally, the short man started coughing and Gerard helped him roll over so he could spit out all the water in his lungs. Frank opened his eyes as he held onto Gerard’s hand, which seemed to be the only solid thing in his blurry world. He felt himself being lifted and in a second he was in Gerard’s lap, his lover hugging him against his chest and kissing his head. Frank grabbed onto Gee’s jacket sleeve, and slowly breathed in and out with him. 

He felt a thousand times heavier, and was content to just lie on Gerard’s arms, both of them not caring about how cold it was getting with their clothes all wet. They were so lost into each other that they barely heard Josh falling onto the floor painfully, grunting in pain. 

“Are you okay?” Gerard asked, not really looking in his direction. The sound had been sharp, like a slap. 

“I’m fine.” Josh answered, holding himself up slowly. All he could think about was the hard sting on his skin that reminded him of that time Tyler dared him to belly-flop from the diving board. And the people told him learning how to swim was stupid and just for rich kids who could afford to go the pool. 

Josh felt absolutely exhausted. Swimming and dragging a guy out of the water after he had being almost completely drained had not been one of his brightest ideas. He closed his eyes and let himself sink into the memory

....

“Josh… what are we doing?!” Tyler whisper-shouted, fidgeting with his hands nervously.

“I’m picking this lock, obviously. And you are waiting for me to pick said lock so we can have the best night of our lives.” He answered casually. He heard Tyler scoff at his back, but knew he was smiling. Josh knew Tyler would complain about them getting into places illegally but would follow him happily. When he got the door open, he gesture towards it with his arm, like a gentleman would do with a lady. Tyler blushed and looked everywhere before stepping in. Josh chuckled and closed the door behind his back. 

“Josh?” Tyler asked, and his voice echoed throughout the place, which was in complete darkness and he was too afraid of stumbling on something and falling on his face. 

“Scared, Tyler?” Josh laughed right next to his ear, making him let out a high-pitched scream and jump away from him. He just laughed louder as he flipped a switch and the lights inside the large swimming pool turned on, making the water glow.

Tyler knew it existed, but never actually got to see it. Only the rich kids could go in there when it was too hot. Basically all the time. Before Tyler could say he didn’t know how to swim, Josh was already taking off his shirt. 

“Holy shit.” He whispered, and felt his cheeks grow so red he was thankful the room was dark. Hell, his entire being was blushing, his blood making him feel all hot and bothered. 

As if the sight of Josh’s bare muscular torso wasn’t enough of a torture, he started to strip until he was only in his black boxers. Tyler wanted to die right there. Josh turned his head towards him, and gave him a broad smile. 

“Well, this is it. I’ve had a good life.” He thought to himself, he was sure his heart was about to explode and he would legitimately die. Instead he watched, frozen in place, how Josh dived into the pool and become a blur underwater. He emerged gracefully, brushing his wet mohawk hair out of his face. 

“Come on Ty! Jump in!” he yelled, smiling. 

“I-I-I d-don’t know how to um… s-swim.” He stuttered and punched himself mentally for it. Seeing Josh’s wet skin was doing things to his head. 

“I’ll teach you.” 

“Like that time you ‘taught’ me how to backflip and I almost broke my face?” Tyler replied, pleased that he was able to come up with that comeback. Good job Tyler. 

“Shut up, I am a great teacher. You’ll be able to do cool stuff like this.” He floated on his back and, taking some water into his mouth, blew it up like a fountain. Tyler chuckled because this guy was such a dork. A very hot, wet dork. If he even considered going into the water with him, it would mean two things: 

One, Josh would hold him. With his arms. 

Two, he would have to strip. 

If he didn’t want to walk home dripping wet. That would be hard to explain. Fuck it. He took his shirt off and Josh fucking whistled at him. Glaring at his friend, he took his jeans off as fast as humanly possible and without thinking it through he jumped. And he sank like a rock, kicking and wrestling against the water, panic rising in his throat until he felt Josh’s strong arm pull him out. 

“Tyler! Tyler!” he said, and he seemed angry. And worried. “Are you insane? God, let me at least hold you first. I got you, calm down.” 

“Josh I almost drowned.” Tyler said, like he couldn’t believe it. 

“I know.” He answered, squeezing his arm and Tyler immediately held onto him, no shame. 

When he was finally calm enough to detach himself from Josh, he swam like a dog, sinking quite often but not afraid anymore because he knew Josh was there to push him up to the surface, placing his hands on his belly and making Tyler become a flustered mess. They both floated on their backs, staring at the ceiling, had splash fights that Josh let Tyler win, and swam around. Or rather Josh swam around with Tyler holding onto him. 

“Don’t you dare let go of me Josh.” Tyler whispered, hugging him when they reached the deepest part of the pool. 

“Wouldn’t even imagine it.”

....

Tyler had told him that story from his perspective not so long after they started dating, and it suddenly became a thousand times funnier and cuter. Josh was smiling like an idiot when Gerard’s voice got him back to reality. 

“Thank you.” 

It was one of those times when those two words were said with such honesty and gratefulness you felt all warm. Like you just saved someone’s life. And Josh saved two that day. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Youngbloods opened their eyes to see themselves in an empty room. They looked around and noticed there were only three of them. Pete’s heart jumped before he located Patrick, but finding him wasn’t a relief. 

There was a knife at his throat, held by Ashlynne, who smirked evilly at them. 

Something horrible would have happened if Joe and Andy hadn’t grabbed Pete by the arms to stop him from running forward like a hunt dog ready to tear a victim apart. He even showed his teeth in an angry growl, struggling slightly but knowing it was a very reckless move and it would probably get Patrick killed. 

“I like your enthusiasm.” Ashlynne mocked him, but Patrick silently pleaded him to stay back. “But you’ve never been good at following orders. That’s why you need a little thread to work. If I’m going to take down a BL/ind that has Devotee on its side I need soldiers. Loyal, unquestioning soldiers, not rebels. I’m sure Phoenix understands. The deal is simple, please be my puppets and sweet Phoenix over here gets to see another day.” 

Dammit, again? Why was Patrick always the bargain coin? Why couldn’t he just be left alone? Why couldn’t people just LEAVE HIM THE FUCK ALONE? 

All those thoughts in Pete’s head boiled his blood, palpitating through his temples and going into overdrive. Even if Andy and Joe tried to make him calm down and don’t do anything stupid, it was Patrick’s soothing eyes that got him to stay in one place. The blue-green eyes he had loved so much were still the eyes of a martyr that would very willingly die for them. But this time was different; it wasn’t a ‘let me die this honorable death’ kind of situation, it was more of a ‘I am really, really tired. Just get it over with’. 

Pete didn’t understand that, Pete was a small man full of rage in love with another small man that was on the verge of giving up. And being as selfish as he was, he wasn’t letting Patrick give up on himself. Patrick had never given up on him no matter how bad things got so why should Pete give up on him. 

“Okay.” Joe said without consulting the others. “You know there’s only one way Phoenix doesn’t get hurt, and you know that’s the option we will take.” 

“Guys…” Patrick was protesting when he felt the blade dig into his skin and the warm blood slowly drip down his neck. Ashlynne didn’t say anything, but the message was clear. 

Phoenix cannot be a puppet; he cannot be alive on my ship any longer. 

Pete felt his life flashing before his eyes and he didn’t want to see any of it. The truth was that he had been a complete asshole to Patrick the last few days just because he reminded him too much of Mikey. He was sharp and cold with him and Patrick had been sick of it, he could be kind but didn’t let people like Pete step over him. And now, as if his life was just a cruel joke, he was going to die, drown on his own blood while they didn’t resolve anything. 

Pete came to believe it wasn’t his fault, the pain he felt when Mikey would come to him in his dreams and then the disappointed when he woke up and it wasn’t him on the bed next to him was something he couldn’t control. But instead of being honest with Patrick he bothered him until Patrick was so done he walked away from him himself. Pete convinced himself that was what he wanted, his methods were poor but the end result was the same. 

It wasn’t what he wanted, he got that in that precise moment.

Then it all happened way too fast. Ashlynne gasped visibly and her grip loosened, enough for Patrick to get out and twist her arm, throwing her to the floor. 

They saw Hearts, standing over Ashlynne and pointing at her with a gun. Not a ray gun, a regular, bullet gun. Where she got it from was a mystery for them. The little child hadn’t stayed still after the death of one of her brothers and the disappearance of the other. Oh no, her little body was fueled by the desire of revenge, and she was going to get it. Before Ashlynne could get up Hearts was already firing. 

The bullet dug deep into Ashlynne’s shoulder, and maybe that was Heart’s intension, or maybe she was aiming for her chest and just missed. She was dead serious, not even flinching when the recoil of the gun broke her thumb since she wasn’t holding it right. She stared at the broken digit and blinked a couple times, maybe pain was slowly registering in her brain. Patrick took the gun from her and the second of hesitation between whether he should shoot Ashlynne or not, was all she needed to get out, her powers paralyzing everyone again until she was out of the room. 

Andy was the first to move, directly towards Patrick to wrap his tattooed arms around him. Then Joe joined them, hugging them both and keeping an eye on Hearts, that was distracted on herself not so far. Pete hesitated to even place a step forward, until he saw Patrick’s eyes digging into his, silently calling him and putting the bitterness aside. But Pete couldn’t get the feeling out of his head, so he slowly came into the conclusion that when it came to being a rebel, you just couldn’t afford to fight with anyone you loved, because then destiny would pick that moment to strike and you’ll regret it for the rest of your life. 

And Pete wasn’t taking any chances. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tyler thought he knew what falling felt like. He had endless nightmares about falling into a black pit, and given he climbed everything that seemed climbable (and those structures that didn’t too), he had fallen from some high places. But being thrown out of a flying ship into the air thousands of feet up was a completely different thing. 

He felt like he was a sharp blade cutting through the air on his way down. There was no fear; he knew that if Blurryface wanted to keep existing, he wouldn’t let Tyler die. Then again, he had almost gotten Tyler killed. Even so, when you’ve been in a dark place for as long as Tyler has, death doesn’t scare you anymore. If he died, then he would die and that was it. It was actually pretty simple. What really anchored him to this earth and made him not want to leave was…

“Josh is going to kill me.” He whispered, and the air swallowed his words. It made him laugh slightly. He really hoped Josh would be okay without him. He would; definitely, he would go back to being the nice thug of Battery City. Now the legendary Spooky Jim. Yeah… that would be really nice. 

He was almost falling asleep, just waiting when his body collided with the hard metal nose of the ship. The pain rose like flames enveloping his whole body, and he screamed in agony. He didn’t dare to move, afraid he would fall the rest of the way and this time onto the ground. 

“Is my spine broken?” he asked, and he didn’t expect Blurry to actually answer even though he felt him complaining. 

“I wouldn’t say broken, more like… cracked.” He said, sounding like he was in pain as well. “I would get inside, carefully.” 

Tyler grabbed onto the cold metal of whatever part of the ship he was on, and tried to locate a window or something he could kick in. But then a crazy idea popped into his mind, and a grin appeared on his face. 

“Tyler.” Blurryface said, his tone dangerously low. “Don’t you dare. We will all die, and you know it.” 

“You underestimate how tough we are.” Tyler answered, and rolled over to start climbing towards the sound of the engines. The surface of the ship was smooth, so he used his powers to melt the iron and leave little dents like his fingerprints. It was exhausting, his feet dangling off, having no place to support himself. It was also kind of terrifying, the air hitting his face like tiny blades and making his joints all sore. 

He finally reached a huge metallic cover, and he saw all the gigantic gears turning and the hot air they expelled. Balling his fist tightly, he punched through it and stared at the metal pieces all working with each other to keep the ship in the air. He knew it was extremely risky, but they couldn’t take down S.I.G.H.T if Ashlynne had the crew and her huge flying ship. 

He stopped, thinking about the possibilities of it going terribly, terribly wrong. 

It he had learned something in the little time he was in the desert was that sometimes you needed to make sacrifices. Sacrifices that involved others, and you should do them anyway because that’s the unspoken rule: we have all given our lives for the cause, if something needs to be done to achieve it, then it doesn’t matter the consequences that fall upon ourselves. 

So he reached inside the engines, feeling the metal bite his hands but he grabbed onto whatever piece and pulled it out. Sparks flew and burned his skin, but that only meant it was working. Ignoring the pain, he kept absolutely destroying the engines, sharp pieces of metal flying out and getting lost in the endless skyline, he tore apart cables and wires until he felt the ship shift sideways and through the black smoke he saw that they were indeed, going down. 

He smiled to himself. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everything turned red. Flashing lights and loud sirens filled the hallways, the rooms, and the panic rising from every corner. The soldiers were terrified. They had spent their whole lives on that ship they came to believe it was untouchable, that nothing could ever happen to their beloved home and now it was almost impossible to walk on a straight line due to the giant machine swerving uncontrollably. 

The rebels were even more scared. Did that mean Tyler had failed? Was he dead? They regrouped in the open space of the cafeteria, barely standing until they had to be on their hands and knees to keep from falling over. 

Patrick counted heads, and sighed in relief when he counted all three. Then he scanned the room for the others and saw Josh grabbing onto his hair and breathing rapidly, eyes closed shut. He was screaming, his whole body trembling. Ghoul was holding Hearts tight against his chest, and Party was biting on his lip so hard there was a trail of blood going down his chin, and he was holding onto Ghoul, protecting the little girl between the two of them. 

Then he came to a cruel and bitter realization. 

“Bachelor.” He let the name slip through his lips, and turned to see Pete. He stared back at Patrick with big eyes, shaking his head furiously. 

“Patrick, don’t.” he glared. 

“I can’t leave him.” He answered, and Pete just grabbed his wrist so tightly Patrick let out a yelp. 

“Yes you can!” Pete screamed over the noise. “I am fucking tired of your shit, of you being a fucking martyr Patrick! You’re not going anywhere you hear me?! Call me selfish call me whatever the fuck you want but I’m not letting you go after Bachelor so you can get yourself killed, I don’t give a flying fuck about Bachelor but I give all the fucks about you!! So choose yourself for once!! Choose me!!” 

Patrick didn’t say anything. He had never seen Pete that angry. Or swear that much. He punched the floor with all his might and his knuckles started bleeding, but the frustration didn’t go away. 

“Jesus Christ, I’ll go.” Joe said, and before any of them could grab him he was already crawling towards the hallway. 

“Joe what the hell!” Andy yelled at him. 

“Get back here, right now!!” Patrick ordered, but his voice was full of fear. 

“Oh so you can go around sacrificing yourself but I can’t?!” Joe replied, and he was almost out the room. “I’ll go get Bachelor, and then I’ll be back.” 

“ _Hey guys_ ” a voice came through the speakers, and even though Josh was having a panic attack over the whole situation he raised his head towards the sound. 

“Tyler.” He said, and a dry laugh left his throat. He was panting hard but it he was able to breathe a little. 

“ _I just ripped out this machine’s heart, and the good news is Ashlynne can’t do anything about it. Bad news is we’re going down (down in an earlier round). Everybody take cover and don’t die!_ ”

Then the transmission was over, and Joe was gone. 

~

Wobbling through the hallway, Joe tried not to regret his decision. He was confident that he could find Bachelor and make it back. He screamed his name over and over but no one answered, and the movements of the ship just keep throwing him against the walls. Maybe he should go back, say he didn’t find him and that he was sorry. 

That was the deal with Bachelor; no one thought he was worth saving. Joe wouldn’t admit it, but he felt like if anyone was going to be left behind has Bachelor. Simply because he had lost his spark, it had gone out when Fever died and he had been empty ever since. He wasn’t himself, just a walking corpse that was becoming a dead weight on the rest of them. 

The worst thing was that _it wasn’t Bachelor’s fault._

They hadn’t talked about Fever ever since he died, and Bachelor hadn’t either but they all knew that no matter how terrible the things Fever did were, Bachelor still loved him and he was still hurt by his passing. He would spent days roaming around in the road mumbling to himself about there being no sunshine, no air to breathe, no in-betweens, and the only person who cared enough to at least try to look for him was Patrick. 

Then it all piled up on his back and slowly broke him until all that was left of him was bits and pieces lying on the floor. 

And he was getting left behind. It was horrible and it wasn’t fair, but that was how the world worked. 

Nobody thought it was possible to mend Bachelor back together. Even he himself believed his spark was long gone. Then why was Joe Trohman, Alpha Dog and member of the Youngbloods risking his life for a hopeless cause? 

Because he was mad. Specifically, he was mad at the world, at the cruel world were the weak get left behind and people try so hard to be strong they become ruthless. He was going to find Bachelor goddammit because nobody got left behind on his watch. And since Pete was holding Patrick back, he just took business into his own hands. 

And as if his prayers had been answered, he saw a figure struggling on the ground and when he finally made it at the end of the seemingly endless hallway, he noticed it was who he was looking for. 

Bachelor was lying on the floor, covered in sweat and trying to get his leg out of a big piece of the ceiling that had fallen on it. There were sparks showering from loose wires, and it looked like an explosion had happened there, the metal all burned and black. Joe held the big metal piece with his hands and lifted it just so that with the combined force Bachelor could slide free, leaving some of his pants behind. 

Joe let go of the metal piece and it sank into the floor, and when he whipped around to see Bachelor, he saw the reflection of flames on his eyes. But besides that, he saw a man with a will to live. 

“We need to get out of here.” He said, and grabbed Joe by the arm and started dragging him away from the fire that had formed behind them. 

Joe was starting to get dizzy and suddenly the ship started spinning wildly, making them bang against the walls and the ceiling. When it stopped, the two rebels started running down the hallway as fast as they could. Joe saw that the roof over their heads was about to give in, Bachelor didn’t. Even with his slight limp Bachelor kept sprinting forwards while Joe stopped dead on his tracks and before he could warn his partner, scrap and wires fell down and made a whole in the ground, separating the two guys. 

“Jump!” Bachelor screamed, trying to stay on his feet. 

“I don’t think I can make it!” he answered, and it was true. Jumping long distances had never been his strong point, especially while being on a ship that’s falling from the sky. 

“I’ll catch you!” and he said with all the confidence in the world, standing at the edge of the gaping whole between them. Fortunately it led to a lower floor, but the only safe zone they knew was the cafeteria and they needed to get there. 

“Even if you do, my weight will drag us both down!” 

“You came back for me, Alpha.” Bachelor said, and stared at him with honest eyes. “I am not leaving without you.” 

“You need to keep going, tell the other’s you’re fine.” Joe said, not believing the whole ‘you can make it’ thing. 

“Do you really think they care?!” Bachelor yelled, and he saw tears at the corner of his eyes. “I am no one!! I’m so pathetic no one thinks I deserve to be saved, I am useless without Ryan!!” 

“That’s not true.” 

“But you have a family that is waiting at the end of this hallway worried sick about you!! Out of the two of us who needs to make it back alive is you! I am begging you, Alpha, jump or I won’t forgive myself!” 

Joe bit his lip and shook his head. What the hell. He stepped back just so that he didn’t lose his footing, and bolted forward. 

He felt Bachelor’s hands wrap around his arm, and he was being pulled towards the other end when the ship gave a lurch and threw them off balance. Bachelor tried with all his strength to pull Joe up, but he slipped through his fingers. 

He fell down and dented the floor below him, pain shooting up his hips and spine. 

“Alpha!” he heard Bachelor scream above him. 

“I’m fine!” he lied. He couldn’t walk. “I’ll find another place to hide, go!” 

“But…”

“I said GO!” he yelled, and it came out like a violent cry that pierced through the noise. Then Bachelor was gone. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tyler crawled back inside the ship, it was safer than being outside when Ashlynne was desperately trying to keep it steady and doing the opposite of it. At least they wouldn’t spiral down and hit the ground full force; the crew would be able to slow the collision down a bit. This meant they had a chance of surviving the fall, and Tyler was going to make those numbers go higher. 

He used his powers to locate the rebels, who had gathered all in one spot. It hurt his head to do it, but he pushed through the pain and walked as fast as possible. Tyler knew Blurryface was somehow screwing things up with him, so his powers weren’t a guarantee anymore. He was vulnerable, he could be hurt easily and he was growing weak by the second. A thought wouldn’t leave Tyler’s head, the fact that his powers seemed to be… running out. 

So if he used up what was left, then they would be gone forever. No more Blurryface power. He would go back to being a human with breakable skin, but the truth was that was all Tyler wanted. He wanted to feel human again. 

He could think about that at any other time, he had priorities. 

When he reached the cafeteria, he saw everybody holding onto the tables, which were secured onto the floor. Even there, they were divided into little groups; they had each other so Tyler went straight to Josh. He touched his cheek and Josh looked up, blinking the tears away. Tyler noticed he wasn’t breathing properly, his eyes were watering and he didn’t seem to actually see him. 

“Josh.” He called him, holding him steady. “Josh you hear me?” 

He barely moved his head towards him, twitching almost violently. For once in a very long time, Tyler was truly concerned. He knew Josh had issues with anxiety, but he had never seen him having an attack before. He didn’t know what to do, what to say, what not to do, he was afraid to make it worst. So he wrapped his whole body around Josh, kissing his nape softly. Josh grabbed onto his arms and squeezed hard, but Tyler didn’t care. 

“I know right now it seems like everything is falling apart.” Tyler whispered, and an aura started coming off him, surrounding everyone that was present. “But I won’t let you fall apart with it, okay? I won’t leave you alone; we’ll get through this together. Can you breathe with me? A little slower?” 

Josh trembled and shook his head, tears falling down his cheeks and Tyler was quick to backtrack. 

“Its fine, its fine. I’ll pass, I’m here, remember? I’m here.” 

Tyler projected the aura even harder until he felt like something was tearing at his skin. Maybe that way it wouldn’t be so hard on them when the ship hit ground. He didn’t know how he was doing it, but he didn’t care. He just buried his face on Josh’s back, and waited for it to just end. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

People in Battery City and rebels alike would talk about the crash. They would tell their grandchildren how they saw a giant star engulfed in flames falling from the sky, how the loud bang pierced their ears like a thousand needles, and how the sky turned dark from all the dust and sand thrown into the air. 

The rebels didn’t dare to go near the blast, since a sandstorm was starting to form. 

Tyler was the first to wake up. When he opened his eyes, he felt a million dust particles making them burn. He coughed loudly and tried to find anything he could pull himself up with. Not finding the table that was beside him a minute ago, he raised his arm to feel if there was something above him. Finding nothing but air, he slowly got up, wincing at the pain in his muscles. He had small painful cuts all over his body, probably from pieces of the ship flying off. 

The room was in complete darkness and utterly destroyed. Lights were hanging from the ceiling, chairs and tables everywhere, and just pieces and pieces of metal that had come off the walls, glass from the windows. It was like a hurricane passed through the room destroying everything. He tried to use his night vision, but nothing happened. He tried to spark up his powers, and nothing happened. Has he right in the end? Were they gone? 

He walked blindly towards any direction, trying to find a wall or something he could position himself with. Fortunately he didn’t trip over anything… or anyone. He stepped over the metallic debris like it was a matt of dry leaves, until he reached what seemed to be a wall that was still standing. Without really thinking about it, he punched the surface and his fist went through it like it was paper. Then it started burning and recoiling into black bits. So he hadn’t lost his powers. 

Light came through the hole, and Tyler continued to tear a way out with his hands. He saw there was still a decent drop, and the rest of the ship was crushed under them. He turned around when he heard coughing, and rushed to that whoever’s side. It was Bachelor that had made it to the cafeteria just before the crash, the lucky bastard. 

“Hey, are you hurt? Do you feel anything?” Tyler asked, removing the pieces that had fallen on his chest. 

“I think I’m mostly fine.” He answered, sitting up and running his hand through his messy hair. “Don’t seem to have anything broken.” 

Slowly but steadily, they started looking for the others, shaking them awake and helping them on their feet. They all had deep slashes on their bodies, which were bleeding and tinting everything red, but Tyler was so glad everyone was alive. He wrapped an arm around Josh, who had a pretty long wound on his cheek and seemed to be more light-headed than the others. 

“Are you alright?” Tyler asked, and Josh knew he was talking about earlier. 

“I think I passed out before we hit ground, so I didn’t feel much.” He answered, and Tyler held him tighter. “But I’m alright.” 

Not everyone was so alright. Believer was holding his hands tightly, and still blood was seeping out and down his arm, and Phoenix was talking to him softly, trying to soothe him. 

“This is my dominant hand, ‘Trick.” He was saying, clearly upset and in pain. Andy tore a piece of his already torn shirt to press it onto his wound. Believer held it in place and stared at his hand, now missing the ring and pinkie finger. “How am I supposed to shoot a gun now?” 

“You can learn to use your other hand; it’s not the end of the world.” Phoenix said sweetly, clenching his metallic hand into a fist. 

Party Poison walked onto the light with Fun Ghoul almost hanging from his grip. Blood was dripping from Ghoul’s face, and he was hiding behind his hair. Everyone gave him a concerned look, and Poison shook him slightly, but he didn’t look up. Hearts was with them, and she wasn’t so hurt, the adults had taken most of the blow. The ones that weren’t missing parts had skin hanging loosely, shards sticking out and blood cascading down and damping their clothes. 

But they were all alive. 

Tyler was the first to jump down, seeing how he was virtually unharmed. He landed and rolled, feeling the hot sand and the sun beaming down on him. Josh went next, completely trusting Tyler to catch him. And he did. Apparently his powers were starting up again, filling him with the force he needed to receive a grown man falling from a considerable height. One by one they jumped down, Tyler lowering them completely onto the ground. Hearts jumped down without much hesitation. When Party was on the ground, he shouted: 

“Come on! It’s okay!” 

And so Ghoul dropped down, and then rushed to hide behind Party. 

“Frank, cut it out.” Tyler heard Party whisper. “I know it hurts but you need to get your hair out of it, it’ll get infected.” 

Party brushed Ghoul’s long black hair out of his face tenderly, and his hand lingered on his cheek. Ghoul bit his lip and stared at Party with one, single hazel eye. Blood was still dripping down his cheek, coming from where his eye should be, where there was a raw, angry red wound. 

He moved his eye around and kind of turned his head the other way, so they could only see one side of his face. 

“We need to get out of here.” Phoenix said, looking around for anything that could tell them where they had landed. “Get our wounds cleaned.” 

“Wait.” Believer said, his eyes growing wide. “Where’s Alpha?” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With Tyler’s help, they found Joe. They had to tear through corridors to find him, and the Youngbloods were just following Tyler blindly, not daring to ask if he knew if Joe was okay. He hadn’t said anything, he could be hiding the fact that maybe he knew Alpha was dead and he was just leading them to a body they could bury. Andy was looking straight ahead, not showing any emotion, while Patrick was holding Pete’s hand tightly, half to keep his wound from bleeding half for comfort. 

They had to step over corpses, both of rebels and soldiers. Tyler clenched his fists at the sight, he hadn’t thought about the other innocent people on the ship, and their deaths were on him. As if he wasn’t a killer already. As he walked down the destroyed corridors, he stared at his blackened hands and couldn’t help thinking how much blood was on them. He doubted he would be able to keep going like that. Then he thought about Josh, and concluded he couldn’t leave just yet. 

He was also tracking Ashlynne, trying to find her among the broken ship. He felt nothing. 

They reached an open room, light was coming down from holes in the roof, holes that went through some stories. It was a hundred times more destroyed than the cafeteria, given the fact that the impact was stronger there. The Youngbloods didn’t understand why Tyler had leaded them there if it was empty, and then they saw him. 

“No…” they heard Andy whispered before he rushed and knelt down. 

Pete and Patrick got closer and saw Joe. He was lying on his back, eyes barely open and his skin was covered in black dust. There was a big sharp piece of metal sticking out of his chest, and he had been bleeding for a while, his whole chest was covered in blood that started forming a pool below him. 

“Guys…?” he whispered, breathing with difficulty and trying to focus on them. 

They didn’t say anything. They couldn’t, the words were stuck on their throats. Joe just looked at the metal sticking out of him, and sighed. 

“Well fuck.” He didn’t feel any pain or his body at all. 

He heard sobbing and looked at Andy that was covering his mouth and thick tears were rolling down his cheeks. He wanted to say ‘please don’t cry’, that he didn’t want him to cry… but he was feeling like crying too, seeing his friend so torn. While Pete and Patrick were together and having their drama and reconciliations, they had bonded over the time they spent together. Joe’s fingers twitched, and Andy held his hands. He couldn’t feel it, but the gesture made him feel warm. 

Patrick had started crying too. No, please no. Joe hated seeing them cry. Pete on the other hand had his eyes closed tightly and a single tear had rolled down his face. But Joe knew that tear wasn’t one of sadness, but of rage. Pete was pissed, he didn’t know why but he was trying to cover pain with anger. Joe tried to speak, but the words wouldn’t come out. The three of them shushed him. 

“I’m sorry.” Pete finally said, biting his lip harshly. “I’m sorry…”

Joe only nodded; his only way of saying it was okay. Joe didn’t care what Pete was apologizing for, he forgave him anyway. And then, his light ocean eyes stared into nothing, completely lifeless. Pete got up as fast as he could and walked away, stomping his way back outside. 

Without saying a word, he punched Bachelor in the face so hard it knocked him out. Party was quick to stop him front going at him again, pushing backwards as Josh knelt to see Bachelor’s bloodied face. Frank, who had been immersed in his own world, stood behind Party to stop Pete if he got past him. 

“Believer…” Party growled, struggling with Pete and placing his arm firmly against his chest to stop him. “Control yourself.” 

“It is all his fault!” he shouted, finally giving in and crying his anger out. “He’s the reason Joe is dead!” 

“He took his own decision.” Frank argued, trying to sound reasonable but comforting. “Bachelor doesn’t deserve to be blamed for how things happened.” 

“It should’ve been him!!” he screamed, but stopped when he heard Patrick and Andy coming back. Tyler was with them as well. 

“Stop it.” Patrick ordered, and his voice let him know he wasn’t up for discussion. 

“Your leader gave you an order. Follow it.” Party said, and Pete stepped back, huffing. 

Suddenly, Hearts spoke up, her voice full of sorrow. She hadn’t spoken since the crash, and she seemed to be calm despite everything that had happened. The kid had kicked Ashlynne and pointed at her with a gun, she was tough. 

“Tyler?” she asked, looking up at him with her shiny blue eyes. 

“Yes?” 

“Where’s my brother? Is he still alive?” 

Tyler fell silent for a moment, and everybody thought he was about to tell the little girl that had just lost one of his brothers that the other one was gone too. But instead he looked really focused, and then a smirk appeared on his lips. 

“He is. And I’ll bring him to you.” 

He disappeared inside the ship, trotting away from them. Everybody sat down on the sand, exhausted, thirsty and in pain. They didn’t want to think about what they needed to do next, fight Ashlynne and Korse at the same time? Right then they only wanted to wash the blood off and rest. It turned out Tyler wasn’t lying, as he came out of the ship walking with Dark Spade’s arm thrown over his shoulder. He had found him in a cell, still tied up and barely conscious. But he was alive. 

Hearts ran towards him and almost made him fall while tackling him with a hug, but her brother just smiled even though his whole body was aching. Andy had gone back into the ship despite Patrick telling him not to, but he was back just in time. 

“We need to get out of here.” He said, and everybody noticed he was carrying Joe’s body in his arms delicately, as if it was something of extreme value. Patrick nodded and started walking, everybody silently following him. Frank and Gerard were going to carry Bachelor, but Josh offered to do it. They walked slowly, weak and wounded. 

“Joe wouldn’t want you to do that to Bachelor.” Patrick said, walking alongside Pete, who was still fuming. “It’s not his fault, even if it feels that way.” 

“How can you be so collected?” Pete asked, looking away. 

“I’m not.” He answered, and they didn’t speak again. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rebels reached a lair full of scared rebels that had probably being hiding ever since the Poisonous Battle. When they heard the door knocking and opened the door to see Party Poison, Fun Ghoul with only one eye, American Phoenix with a mechanical hand, Black Believer with two finger less, Inked Serpent holding a dead Alpha Dog in his arms, Blurryface, Spooky Jim, a guy with color-changing eyes and a little kid, they were pretty surprised. And astonished. But seeing the state they were in, the young rebels were quick to make room for the older ones. Those rebels were still very young, barely getting used to the life in the desert but they had to admit they were pretty well established. 

One of them even accomplished what Gerard had been trying for hours: To cheer Frank up. The teenager had given him an eye patch with a skull on it, and said that he could be a badass pirate. That small gesture made Frank smile. 

Gerard had been strangely quiet, and only Frank seemed to know what was going on with him. He had his game face on. Party Poison had surfaced once again, and oh was he mad. He asked one of the young rebels to give him a radio, and suddenly he was a thousand times deadlier and no one dared to question him. The only appropriate answer was a ‘yes sir!’. 

He found Dr. Death Defying’s signal and asked for a transmission, and even him didn’t say no, and Dr. D wasn’t someone who could be pushed around by rebels. He held the radio close to his mouth, and Frank could see the wrath in his eyes when he whispered: 

“For the two leaders out there, I know you’re listening. You always are. We are no longer pieces of your games. You’ve killed enough people and broken too many hearts. Oh, you tried to tame us, turn us into pawns that you could send out to die but now we are the kings that turned their backs on you the ones who tried to control us. You cannot extinguish the flame of the revolution, no matter how hard you try, because it burns bright in every man and woman’s heart. You’ve destroyed everything we ever cared about, our families, our homes. But you cannot destroy _us_ , because even if this is a wasteland, it is _ours_. This is Party Poison, leader of the Fabulous Killjoys and of the Desert Revolution, making a call to every rebel out there. Put on your mask, tighten your boots. Let’s make some noise.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The desert could be deadly silent sometimes, like there was no life between the sand. But that day, a loud battle cry was heard all throughout the Zones, rebels from near and far gathered to fight one last time. With pain still fresh, wounds still open, hundreds of rebels formed before the two remaining Killjoys. Party Poison, his freshly dyed hair going wild with the wind like a flame, his eyes determined behind his mask; and Fun Ghoul, powerful arms crossed over his chest, raising his chin to defiantly look with his one eye. The rebels returned that look, their own sign of respect. 

The Youngbloods were there, silent, facing them from the front lines. People noticed there were only three of them, so they placed their hand over their hearts and chanted: 

“A Youngblood has fallen.” 

Phoenix breathed in deeply and nodded, acknowledging their gesture. 

Party made a sign, and a young guy stepped forward. He had short brown hair and his hands and neck were pitch black, and when he stood in front of the Killjoys everybody fell silent, not even the wind was howling. 

“Blurryface.” Party said, looking up at him. They could feel the tension in the air; Tyler felt how some rebels placed their hands on their guns ready to shoot at him if he even dared to raise a finger against their leader. He felt like a hundred chains were placed around him, and they were just waiting for him to pull so they could fry him for good. 

Party simply stepped aside, and said: 

“This man is the reason we are alive.” 

Some whispers erupted from the crowd, angry and hurt comments leaving the rebels mouths in such numbers Tyler felt trapped. 

“I know that when you see him you see the face of a killer.” He continued. “But the truth is there are two different people living inside this one body. One is, you’re right to say it, a killer. Blurryface. The other is called Tyler, who is standing beside me right now. He has an incredible power, and he used it to fight for us so we could escape and be here today. He has been fighting the red-eyed demon on his own, a battle inside his mind that he has been able to withstand for _years_. Tyler is the reason Blurryface is no longer terrorizing our loved ones, because he is taking all the pain by letting Blurryface hurt him so he cannot hurt _you_. This man, right here, is a hero, and he deserves all the respect we have.” 

The rebels cheered loudly, throwing their fists into the air, a sign of support, a sign of respect. Tyler felt something in his chest, something that he hadn’t felt in a long time. He felt accepted; suddenly those strangers were his family, his brothers and sisters he had to protect. 

“Lead the way. I’m right behind you.” Party told him over the noise of screaming voices and stomping feet. 

“Thank you.” he whispered, and only Party could hear him. He smiled, and started walking forward, following the pull of Ashlynne’s power and feeling his own build up with every step he took, black smoke swirling around his hands, coming out of his eyes and ultimately turning into a flame that burned in the palm of his hands, filling the air with the smell of gasoline. He opened his arms as if they were wings, the flames burning bright like torches that led the way to their revenge, their victory. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ashlynne and Korse didn’t stand a chance. Even though the woman had come to him after her ship had fallen, not even their combined forces were able to withstand the destructive power of the rebels. The colorful army marched into a base near Battery City, and completely annihilated any chances of them getting back in control. And honestly, Korse was kind of relieved he didn’t have to share the power with Ashlynne, she was basically his nemesis. And yet she had come begging for help when she realized the rebels were dangerous to all sorts of government that didn’t play by their rules. He tried to warn her, and it has a huge, satisfying ‘I fucking told you’ now that they were on their knees, tied up and surrounded by all the people they had hurt through the years. Well, at least Korse, Korse knew that if Party Poison gave the order he would get beaten to death, all of them taking turns to kick him or something. 

Ashlynne on the other hand, she had the privilege of being killed by the top rebels, the ones she manipulated. 

“Who here has lost someone because of this man?!” Party shouted, and got an overwhelming response that made the prisoners shrink. “How many of us have lost a brother, a sister, a lover because of him?! How many of our comrades have fallen?! How many are dead?!” 

“Go on, children” Korse hissed, and everybody listened. “Who’s gonna be the one to pull the trigger? Who’s gonna live with that for all eternity? Knowing they killed the great Korse leader of Better Living Industries?” 

“I will.” Poison spoke up, and stepped forward. 

“Predictable choice. Party Poison, leader of the Fabulous Four, or should I say Fabulous Two? That doesn’t have the same ring to it, does it?” Party felt his blood run hot at Korse’s words. “Leader of the whole fucking revolution. But you’re not the only one whose feelings I hurt, what about you, Little American Phoenix? Don’t you miss having two normal hands?” 

It was Believer who growled at the statement, but the others were visibly offended too. Most of them had heard the message Phoenix had sent while he was trapped. They all knew what had happened. 

“And you, Nicotined Bachelor, don’t you miss your little boyfriend Ryan? Yeah, you’re still bitter about that, but last time I checked it was you who killed him!” 

Everybody started mumbling between them, but Bachelor didn’t let that make him nervous. His partners knew the truth, and other people needed to know it as well. 

“His name was Odd Fever.” He started. “But to me he was Ryan Ross. He was tortured to the edge of death and was used as a puppet by Korse to carry out his plans. He made mistakes, mistakes that led to consequences that seemed unforgivable. He was the living proof of what BL/ind could do to a person without turning them into a sick drac. I shot him, and he died in my arms, paying the price of what Korse had done to him.” 

Party pointed his ray gun at Korse’s head, looking at him straight in the eye. 

“You’re the reason Jet Star is dead.” Party said, and instead of sadness his voice was full of rage. “Disappeared without a trace, didn’t even bother to leave his body for us to bury. What you did leave was my little brother’s body lying on the road with his throat slit. You’ve put me and many others through the most unbearable of pains. You broke us into pieces that we and the people we loved had to put back together, cutting ourselves with the edges. Our skin is covered in scars and our hands are tough, we’re full of wounds. All because of you” 

Some's breathing hitched, Frank’s included. In a second, every rebel in the room was connected, they placed their hands on the other’s shoulders until they were all part of the net, which came full circle and ended in Party. And so it wasn’t just him holding the gun, it was the entire rebel community holding the gun. 

“Well my plan worked.” Korse answered. “She told me you’re Hesitant Alien now, that guy is a coward. He doesn’t deserve any of this glory.” 

“You’re wrong, Korse. I am Party Poison.” 

The entire rebel community held the gun and pulled the trigger. 

The leader of Better Living Industries, the one that made their lives a living hell finally fell to the ground, dead. The blood splattered onto Ashlynne’s face, and she laughed maniacally. You would expect the rebels to be loud about their victory over Korse, but they were silent, still linked together. The only sound was Ashlynne’s heavy breathing. Tyler was the one who stepped forward this time, and Party placed his hand on his shoulder. 

“Oh, so it’s going to be you?” Ashlynne said, laughing hysterically. “The red-eyed demon has finally caught up to me…”

Tyler didn’t say anything, he didn’t have to. He placed his hands, the hands that had killed so many times, the hands that had wielded the fire of the revolution that day, on Ashlynne’s temples. He closed his eyes and let that same fire rush through his veins and through his fingertips, destroying everything in front of him, all life, and all power. Turning off the lights, and when he opened his eyes again, Bargain was lying lifeless on the floor, her eyes turned to white and her aura no longer present. 

Tyler wondered where she’d go, given she wasn’t human. Would she be trapped in a padded cell? Something told him the answer was not pretty. 

It was the cheering of the rebels that really took them back to reality, the reality that everything was over. The Youngbloods engaged one of their group hugs, and Tyler saw Josh in the crowd smiling at him, that words were not needed, it was a look that said: “You’ve done so much good, I’m proud of you.” it made Tyler feel all warm and fuzzy, so he quickly went up to him, not caring about the people that stepped aside and away from him, and wrapped his arms around him tightly. 

Bachelor was received with pats on the back and hugs, and for the first time in a very long time, he felt like he wasn’t alone. 

However, Gerard was deadly serious. He was staring at the two corpses, not really listening to what went on around him. The fact that is was actually all over downed on him like a bucket of ice water, leaving him speechless. His heart ached when he remember that his friend and his brother weren’t there with him to see how far they’d come. 

His mind instantly jumped to back when he was in Battery City. When he was twelve years old and already had to take care of Mikey, who was only eight. He remembered telling him stories about heroes and monsters so he wouldn’t ask about mom and dad or get scared at night when they were alone. He had said that someday, they would be those heroes, fighting evil side by side. 

And they did become heroes, they did fight evil, but Mikey wasn’t there to see that it hadn’t been in vain. 

He only realized he had started crying when he felt Frank’s arms around him, and he buried his face into his black hair and sobbed there for a while. At least he had Frank, the little dude that had stuck with him through thin and thick and had loved him despite everything. He wasn’t so alone. And he would never be. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After everything that had happened, rebels were faced with a question a little hard to answer. 

Now what? 

There was no need to keep living in the desert, in such conditions. They were no longer wanted criminals; they no longer had to be weary of every shadow on every corner. The majority of them made a pretty large group that marched into Battery City, with their chins high and their chests puffed, like a massive ‘fuck you’ to everyone who said they wouldn’t make it out there. 

The people of the City were, at the most, terrified, yet curious. They had heard the rumors of rebel groups living in the Zones, and now there was a whole parade of them, men and women in bright, dusty clothing, hair dyed crazy colors and holding spray-painted ray guns. The people watched their masks, their bodies full of wounds and scars, the way they moved. It all sent the message that they were there to stay, and nobody was telling them otherwise. 

Most of them headed for their homes, weird feelings in their guts, wondering how their relatives would react. 

Gerard knew exactly how his would. 

Frank was with him, but he stayed back when he saw Gerard walk up to his house and knock the door. His old home looked like it hadn’t changed, but the man that opened the door was old and some white hairs stuck to his head. 

“Father.” 

The word felt impersonal, cold. More like an official than a relative, and it had always been like that. Gerard stood straighter when his father’s gaze examined him. 

“And so the prodigy son returns home.” The old man said, almost mocking him. “What did you do out there, huh? When you decided to jump the fence and become a criminal, you dare to show your face around here?” 

“I led the revolution, sir” Gerard answered like a soldier would talk to an upper rank captain. “I stood for what I believe in, and I won, sir.” 

“Is that so?” he didn’t look impressed. “Are you the Party Poison everybody keeps talking about?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“And what is Party Poison doing here, at my doorstep?” he asked, and his words were tinted with venom. 

“I’ve returned home…”

“No. I once had a son named Gerard Way. He died when he stepped out of this house and decided to join a group of drug addicts and go live like a criminal in the desert. I do not know you, my son has been dead to me for years, and this is no longer his home.” 

Frank was watching everything from a distance, and he couldn’t help but noticing pain rolling off Gerard. He was trying to keep his posture, but the mask was slowly slipping. 

“Where’s my other son?” the man asked. “Where’s Michael?” 

Michael. 

The mask fell to the floor and shattered into a million pieces. Gerard looked down at his shoes and started to tremble, not able to look his father in the eye. He knew he wasn’t the favorite, he knew damn well that to his father he had been a disappointment from the very beginning, he was never good enough. But… 'Michael' was the baby of the family; he didn’t have any expectations because he was just a kid. 

“Answer me!” his father shouted, and Gerard flinched back a little, memories flooding his brain. “And look me in the eye when I talk to you!” 

“He’s dead!” Gerard answered, looking up at him through tears. “I took him with me because I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving him behind, and I got him killed!” 

Mr. Way just stayed there, very still, staring at his crying son that was no longer a child. He slapped him hard in the face, the sound making everyone go silent. The Youngbloods were holding Frank back, who was struggling with them like a rabid dog. Gerard stopped crying, and he didn’t move an inch, not even to raise his head. 

“You useless piece of shit.” The man spat. “All you ever had to do was take care of your brother; it was your only duty, your only purpose in this world and you ruined it, just like you ruined everything. It is your fault Michael is dead, it is your fault he didn’t get to live because you made a choice and it was the wrong one.” 

“His name was Mikey.” Gerard whispered, just as his father was ready to slam the door. 

“What did you say to me?” he asked, hatred in his voice and it looked like the Youngbloods wouldn’t be able to hold the small killing machine much longer

“I said his name was Mikey.” He said, this time louder and raising his head over his father’s, throwing his shoulders back at full height. “He was a rebel and he fought bravely for our cause, saved hundreds of lives. Michael might have died the second he left home, but Mikey lives on, with me, with us. Because he was a hero, he was our hero.” 

The few rebels that were gathered nearby placed a hand over their hearts, and Gerard’s father watched with conflicted eyes what his son had made. Hell, he had escaped the City, he had survived for years on the desert, he had dyed his hair bright red and had brought down a whole organization, by being part of an army. He silently slid back into his empty house, closing the door. 

Gerard just sighed, but was soon tackled by Frank into a bear hug that seemed to wash all the heaviness away. 

He instead focused on the fact that he was marching into Battery City, finally triumphant. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Oh the dark alleys, the dirty streets he used to roam around had not changed at all. They all held memories, good and bad, sweet and bitter and the combination of both. It was there were Tyler felt secure, at home, in the silent alleyways far from the movement and commotion of the City. 

That was where he saw Blurryface for the last time. 

He was standing in front of him, chains still holding his wrist together. They didn’t move nor speak for a while, just stared into each other. Tyler felt his own wrist itch, but he controlled himself and didn’t scratch the skin until it bled like he used to. 

“Depression, my old demon, my old partner.” He said with nostalgia present in his voice. “How many sleepless nights we spent together.” 

“Far too many, Joseph.” He answered. Something had shifted, something had changed in him. He seemed rather calm than malicious. He was also beaten down, bruises and cuts adorned his skin, but the black of his hands and neck was still vibrant. 

“Now that I have control, I have the choice to set you free or trap you forever inside me.” 

“And what are you gonna do, TyJo.” 

“Even if I don’t like it you've become a part of me.” Tyler said, and his eyes were completely serious. Blurryface had seen that look a few times, and it terrified him. 

“Yes, I have.” He admitted. Tyler was his vessel; of course he was a part of him. 

“But it is time that I let go of it.” 

“You gonna free me?” he asked, not quite believing him. But Blurryface had learned not to patronize the kid he had tortured for so many years, that had caused him a lot of trouble in the past. 

“Yes” 

“Why?” he couldn’t help but asking. “I’m a monster, I hurt people.” 

“Well, by showing mercy to a monster, I let go of my fears, my insecurities.” Tyler answered. “I let you go. You’ll torture someone else's sleep and it will be bad. But sometimes that someone will be like me; they will find purpose through you one way or another.” 

And it that moment, Blurryface realized Tyler Joseph was no longer afraid of him. 

“I don’t choose to free you, Blurryface, I choose to free myself.” 

He stayed silent for a moment, and then shook his head. 

“You're very special, Tyler Joseph.” He said, staring at him right in the eye. “You've freed me, yes, but within you there’s the power to kill me. Over and over again. You, Tyler Joseph, have the power to save lives.” 

The chains burned and disappeared from his wrists, but he didn’t move. They smiled at each other, an honest smile…

And never saw each other again. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a new dawn for the rebels. They stuck around in Battery City and some of them even found homes and warm arms to receive them, other weren’t so lucky. 

The Youngbloods didn’t even bother, they knew all they had was each other, and that was okay. It still hurt the fact that Joe wasn’t there, the wound was still open and the pain was still very raw, so they would stay out of the spotlight at least for a while. It took time to heal after all. 

No one could deny Inked Serpent was completely devastated by the loss of his best friend. So he replaced that pain with the slight burn of a needle he knew so well. He got a black jackal with bright ocean eyes tattooed on his neck, looking exactly like Joe's mask. That way he carried his friend's memory on his skin forever

Frank and Gerard didn’t leave each other’s side for a second. Frank didn’t have any family left and Gerard lost his only remaining relative. It made him question whether everything he had done was worth it, but all his doubt washed away when he saw how… happy everyone was. They loved whoever they wanted to love, lived the way they wanted to live. 

They were free. 

So of course it was worth it. 

He didn’t know what the future held for him, but it looked much brighter now that neither BL/ind nor S.I.G.H.T was present to make their lives a living hell. He had fought the good fight, and it had been more than enough. Gerard Way had finally succeeded, and life was rewarding him with a loving partner who could be his home, and years of peace yet to come. Frank had never asked for much, in the end through the pain and misery and blood, he got what he always had wanted. 

To have someone he could trust, place his life in their hands and not be scared. Frank Iero wasn’t scared anymore. Frank and Gerard were happy, and that’s all that ever mattered. They moved forward, remembering the people they lost but smiling at each other. 

Bachelor was starting to move on as well. Ryan had left a gaping hole in his chest he had struggled to fill, to complete, to ignore, and nothing seemed to work. His life had spiraled down into a pit he didn’t see an exit to. But with time, little by little, he started to pick up his pieces and put them back together himself. He realized he was on his own, but came to terms with it and breathed in and breathed out. He could do it, he couldn’t give up. He owned it to Ryan. 

Brendon Urie was convinced his path would be a lonely one. The universe had other plans for him; he just needed to be patient.

Tyler came to the conclusion that love was selfish. He tried not to think about his choice too much, about what he had done in the past and what he would do in the future. Instead, he took joy in the fact that everything seemed to be so… beautiful. The trees looked alive, bushy, inviting. The people beamed, full of emotion. His world had shifted from dull greys into a harmonic colored pallet. Inside he felt no pain, no heaviness, and no dark thoughts poisoning his mind. He had forgotten what that felt like. 

And Josh, his best friend, his lover, that had seen him at his worst, was now delighted to see him at his best. There was nothing in this world Josh wanted more than Tyler to heal, to be free of the demon in his head, for him to stop screaming, to stop crying. And even though it was way more complicated than that, Josh got what he wanted. 

Tyler Joseph, the little guy with the cute smile and the profound words. He had a mission, _they_ had a mission. The other rebels, the Youngbloods, the Killjoys, they had been the hope of a generation, they had saved lives. 

Now it was their turn. 

Dark Spades continued his labor in Battery City, along with his sister Winged Hearts. Dark Spades knows his duty will never be over, he’s destined to live among the broken and mend every piece of them forever, and he was the constant light that never faded. The guy with magical eyes would eventually be alone, no family, just the ones he would form over the years. It was an endless cycle, to see life come to its peak and then watch it slowly grow old while he stays the same. But that’s okay, he chose the gift and that’s what comes with it. 

No one can deny the horrors the sky witnessed throughout the years, it is forever engraved in people’s skins, in people’s hearts. These desert people, the rebels…

They will start over in this wasteland of theirs, and make it a better place. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there.  
> Well, this is the end.  
> I can't find the right words to describe what this journey has been, what it meant to me. This characters, this people... they make our world a little brighter. I hope you liked this series that comes to an end, I just want to let you know how happy this makes me, the comments and the kudos have given me hope when times get dark. It's those little things, the little details. I can say I am proud of what I've made, I'll forever hold this creation in my heart.  
> and, thank you, for making all of this possible.  
> I love you, stay strong, stay alive. <3
> 
> this wont be the last you see of me ;)


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